Full Circle

 

By Crystal Wimmer

Prologue: March, 2002

Lois glanced out the window of their new two-storey home. She
could still smell the paint in this room, so she struggled until
she was able to raise the window wide open. She enjoyed the fresh
air, the sound of birds, and the peace of this quiet
neighborhood. Raised in the city, Lois had her doubts about
moving into the suburbs, but Clark had for once been insistent.

"Lois, think of the crime rate," Clark had argued. "It would
be safer for CJ, and the schools are better. It's time we
moved."

"Clark, no. I don't want to commute. We can't do our jobs from
forty minutes away. Besides, we have a good daycare here, and I
don't want to search for that again."

"Lois," Clark had pleaded, "his school is as important as his
daycare."

After months of argument, Lois had conceded defeat, more as a
measure of Clark's persistence than actual agreement. In truth,
he had some good points: the Metropolis School District had been
plagued with crime and accusations of apathetic teachers. There
were guns in the schools, and often in the teachers' desks. The
classrooms were overcrowded and children failed to receive the
individualized attention that they really needed.

The entire issue of drugs was another point of contention. While
Lois had difficulty believing it, drugs had been reported in the
*primary* grades. Art and Music had been dropped due to their
expense, and journalism training as well. The sports programs
were failing and, in general, the entire school system was a
mess. No, she didn't want her CJ there.

Finally, they had found a small land plot in the tiny suburban
area of Claremont, just outside of Metropolis. They had assisted
in the design for the building of this three-bedroom,
two-bathroom brick home with a full basement. It was beautiful.
Lois was pleased with the house, but still concerned with CJ. He
had been despondent since the move was initially discussed. He
had looked forward to starting kindergarten with his friends at
the daycare center, and was disappointed that he would not have
the chance.

Lois and Clark had enrolled CJ in a before- and after-school
activity program, and he would begin school at Claremont
Elementary in a few days. Lois was confident that CJ would make
friends quickly. Although he had Clark's reserved nature, he was
as friendly as any child Lois had ever seen. The schools out here
had a better reputation, and she had less fear of the situation.

Just then, Lois heard CJ's voice drifting softly up to the
window. She couldn't make out the words, but she could hear the
concern in his voice. Peeking out the open window, she saw her
son carefully looking both ways to cross the street in front of
the house. She considered stopping him but, as she had an
excellent view from where she was, she elected to observe.

***

CJ looked carefully, left, right, and left again, before crossing
the small street. There were no cars to be seen or heard nearby,
so he figured he was pretty safe. His mom hated him to leave the
townhouse without permission, but things felt different here, and
she hadn't *told* him he had to stay at home.... He heard a
small voice, and it sounded as if it were crying, so he needed to
find out what was wrong. Approaching the house across the street,
a smaller and older version of their new house, CJ saw a little
girl sitting next to the steps leading to the porch.

"What's wrong?" CJ asked her.

"You're not a girl," the child sobbed softly.

"That's not something to cry about."

"My mama said that a girl might move into your house. But
you're not a girl. Now I'll never have anyone to play with."

"You can play with me," he assured her. "I'm CJ. What's your
name?"

"I'm Katie. Well, my mama calls me Kathryn, but at school
everyone calls me Katie."

"What school do you go to?"

"I'm in kindergarten."

"I get to start kindergarten on Monday. My mom says I'll like
it better than daycare, but I don't think so."

"It's okay. At least there's someone to play with. There's no
kids on this street, just old people. My mama says that's why
it's so quiet, but I think it's just boring."

"Maybe we could be friends."

The little girl looked up at CJ from her seated position. Her
huge green eyes were obscured behind blond bangs that had become
too long, and her ponytail was on the verge of coming untied.
"I'd like a friend," she told him solemnly.

CJ smiled and sat down next to her, using the cement steps as a
backrest the way she did. "Good," he told her, "'cause if
we're the only kids here, we'd better stick together."

***

Lois witnessed the exchange from her perch at the window. CJ sat
next to the small girl. After a short conversation, they began
drawing in the dirt with sticks. She realized that she would have
to reprimand him later for crossing the street without asking,
and not telling her he was leaving, but that was for later. Now,
it appeared he had made a friend, and that was more important.
There were few children that she had seen in the neighborhood,
and she was glad that there was someone that CJ could talk to
that was around his own age. She hoped the child would be a
friend to her son. He seemed lonely lately, and it was a
loneliness that a mother couldn't breach. He needed friends, and
this was a good start.

With a satisfied sigh, Lois left the window and went back to
shifting clothes from boxes into the dresser. She would find
Clark in a few minutes to tell him of CJ's new friend. She was
feeling slightly better about the move now, and she wanted to let
him off the hook. After all, this was really the first time that
Clark had insisted on making a major decision that Lois disagreed
with. Perhaps that was why she had let him sway her into this
move; she didn't want to leave the city, but she did know that
Clark always had their best interests at heart. He would never
hurt their family.

In addition, his arguments had been right. She had never
questioned his accuracy, just his insistence. At the moment, she
was glad she had deferred to him this time. The house was
beautiful, and it was theirs. CJ seemed to be adjusting, and that
would steadily improve when he entered school. It was with a
light heart that Lois flattened the box she had just emptied and
carried it back to the living room to get another.

***

Ten years later....

***

Kat smiled as she watched the ending to the movie. She loved this
sappy stuff, and CJ was the only person she knew who would
tolerate it with her. He was her best friend, and had been since
kindergarten. She probably knew more about him than was good for
her, but he didn't seem to mind. He was really sweet, and he
seemed to be good at everything. He had helped her with sports,
math, and even cooking. In addition to all this, his mom was the
nicest mom there was. Kat appreciated Lois Kent almost as much as
she did CJ. Kat's mom had died when she was young, and she
missed having a mother around. Lois made up for that. In fact,
lately, Lois had spent almost as much time with her as CJ did.

"That was really good," CJ said as he stopped the tape and hit
the "rewind" button on the VCR.

"Yeah, I love that one." Kat picked up the box for the tape, an
old VHS copy of "Highlander", and handed it to CJ. "I'm not
sure that immortality would be all it's cracked up to be, but I
kind of think it would be cool."

CJ ducked his head in a gesture that had become familiar to Kat.
He was hiding something, and she intended to find out what it
was. He had been this way for the last few months, shying away
from her at odd times, and the feeling made her uncomfortable.

"CJ, do you trust me?"

His head jerked up to look at Kat. "Of course I do! We've been
friends forever. Why?"

"I feel like you're hiding something from me. It's like you
just get quiet all of a sudden, and I can't reach you any
more." Kat vainly tried to explain her feelings, but after a
moment she just shrugged, looking rather sheepish and wishing she
hadn't brought up the subject.

CJ smiled gently. "Welcome to puberty," he commented softly as
he wrapped his arms around Kat. "You're a girl, and I'm a boy,
and there are some things that we just can't understand about
each other."

Kat snuggled into his arms for a moment, drawing comfort, then
leaned back with a grin. "So you mean this is a sex thing?"

"Not really," CJ said, returning her smile. "Just a growing
thing. Every day, I feel different to the day before. It's kind
of weird. Sometimes, I just... I don't know. It's like I can't
relate to anyone. I can't tell my parents; they'd think I'm
crazy. I can't tell my friends -- it's just too weird. I can't
even tell you, because you're not a guy." He smiled anew at the
expression on her face, "See what I mean? You already think I'm
crazy."

"Nah. I tell *you* everything." She glanced at him with a wry
expression. "I even told you when I started my period."

CJ laughed at that. "Actually, you came over here screaming and
crying because you thought you were dying and you were afraid to
tell your dad."

Kat found it a little more difficult to laugh at the incident.
She had been terrified. She had run to the place she felt most
safe, to have them take care of her. She hadn't known what else
to do. CJ hadn't been nearly as frightened as she had, and had
immediately called for his mother. Lois had patiently explained
the facts of a maturing female reproductive system in a very
matter-of-fact way. Kat had felt better, and had even allowed
Lois to walk her home and explain the situation to her father. In
retrospect, the only one who had appeared uncomfortable that
night had been Clark. He had looked around the room, almost
panicked, before announcing that he had forgotten to do something
and dashing out the back door. But then, Clark did that a lot.

"Well, my point is that there isn't *anything* you don't know
about me."

"Frightening thought!"

"CJ! Be nice!" Kat yelled as she tackled him. The two of them
engaged in a short wrestling match, then sobered as CJ allowed
Kat to come out on top. "You never used to let me win."

CJ had that guarded look in his eyes once more. "I just don't
want to hurt you," he said simply. "I'm a lot stronger than I
used to be, and you might get hurt."

Kat looked puzzled at the thought. "You'd never hurt me."

"Not on purpose, no. But sometimes I do stuff I don't mean to.
I break stuff. I just want to be careful."

Kat noted the real concern in CJ's eyes and took his hand in
hers. "CJ, I never feel more safe than when I'm with you.
You're my big brother. You fight the bullies and charm the
teachers, and I know for a fact that you could never hurt me."

CJ smiled at Kat's confidence in him. The fact was, she was two
months older than he was, and nearly as tall. Sure, he was
protective of her, but that came from years of confiding in one
another and backing each other up in battle. Truth be told, he
had gained as much from her protectivness as she had gained from
his. She had defended him against numerous teachers who demanded
that he live up to his "potential", letting them know, in no
uncertain terms, that he deserved a life as well as an
education.

Actually, what he had told her was more than true. He *could*
hurt her. It had been years since she could actually beat him in
a wrestling match, and he had just been beginning to get strong
then. His dad had explained the situation last year when CJ had
gotten mad and pulled off a doorknob that had been locked. CJ's
initial shock had been nothing compared to the surprise he had
received that evening....

***

CJ stood with the doorknob and a good-sized chunk of wood in his
hand, looking and feeling stunned. When he raised his brown eyes
to that of his father, expecting a serious verbal lashing, he was
surprised to see an amused understanding there.

"Son, we need to have a talk."

"I know I shouldn't have been mad, and I'm sorry I broke it,
but it isn't my fault this stupid thing broke. I mean, it's a
door and it should be able to keep out burglars, much less a
fourteen-year-old boy. I didn't even pull the thing that hard,
you know, I just pulled a little, and this happened. I'll pay
for it if you want, I just...."

"SON!"

CJ stopped in mid-sentence to look at his smiling father. "You
don't have to yell."

Clark broke into a full laugh. "Son, you remind me so much of
your mother when you get nervous. Nobody can babble like your
mother, but you sure come close." Once he was under control, he
continued, "I'm sorry for yelling, but we need to have a talk,
and we need to do it before you break anything else."

"I didn't mean to," CJ said sullenly.

"I know. Let's go into your room." Clark took the doorknob
from his son and placed it on the table as they passed through
the kitchen. He made a mental note to replace the door and knob
as soon as possible. Then, he led his reluctant son into the
small but colorful bedroom at the top of the stairway.

Once seated on the edge of the bed, Clark eased into the
conversation he needed to have. He had been rehearsing this since
he realized that the tiny baby entrusted into his and Lois's
care would be around for a while. The years of practice made
little difference, this was still going to be hard. "There's a
reason you can't control your strength. It's kind of a...
hereditary thing."

"You mean I'm strong because you are?"

"Oh, yeah. But it's more than that. CJ, this is really hard,
and you might not believe me at first, but you know I could never
lie to you."

"Yeah, I know."

"This is ridiculous! You're my son, and I can tell you
anything." Clark was exasperated at his own difficulty to deal
with this subject. "First, though, I need you to promise that
what I have to say will not leave this room. Your mother knows,
and your grandparents, but nobody else can find out. Do you
understand me?"

"Not really. What could be that bad, that you don't want anyone
to know about it?"

"It's not bad. Not exactly. Just watch." With that, Clark
decided that a picture could be worth a thousand words and he
stood up to spin. In a moment, Clark was standing before his son,
wearing a blue and red suit that had made him a household word
for more than a decade.

Wide-eyed, CJ watched his father transform into a super-hero.
Staring, he immediately saw the resemblance between the "two"
men, and wondered why he had been so blind. "Oh, wow!"

Clark stood with the suit on and his glasses in his hand. As he
put the glasses back on, he looked down into the stunned eyes of
his son. "Any questions?"

"You have *no* idea!" CJ replied.

Clark smiled and twirled back into his jeans and sweatshirt.
"Shoot."

CJ considered the first thought that came to mind. "Am I as
strong as you?"

"I'm not sure. Probably not, or at least not yet. I was about
thirteen when I started bench pressing cars, but you have your
mother's genes too, so it may take you longer, or you might not
get as strong at all. There isn't any way to be sure, except to
wait and see."

"What else can I do?" CJ's mind was reeling with the
possibilities.

"That remains to be seen. You have always had really good
hearing, so I don't know if it's 'super' or not. The rest was
mainly concentration for me. Learning to control how much I see
or hear, or how much strength and speed I use are just a matter
of really concentrating. That should be the same for you, but I
have no idea what limits you will have, because of your
mother."

Finally, a big thought jumped into CJ's mind. "Can I *fly*?"

Clark smiled. This was his son, but also a true boy. "I doubt
it," he said. At CJ's crestfallen expression, he elaborated,
"I was in my late teens before that started for me, so it will
probably be a while before it starts -- *if* it starts -- for
you.

CJ's eyes became unfocused a moment as he considered the
information. Deliberately, he focused his vision across the room
and onto one of his birthday cards. He had left the cards sitting
up on his dresser, and now he concentrated on the small image of
a basketball in one of the pictures. He concentrated as hard as
he could, focusing his energy on this one point. Gradually, he
saw the basketball begin to darken as the card started to smoke.

Clark watched his son focus his eyesight, and knew what he was
trying to do. He considered stopping the experiment, but decided
that this was a good time to evaluate just how much power CJ had
acquired. When the card began to smoke, Clark placed his cupped
hand before his son's eyes, effectively blocking the beam.

The sudden appearance of a hand before his face startled CJ from
his task. He looked up to see his father smiling. "You need to
be careful what you focus on," Clark told him. "You can do a
lot of damage that way."

"This is amazing!" CJ shouted. "What else can I do?"

"That's something that will take time to find out. It may be
fun, but we'll need to find a safe place to do it."

***

Chapter 1

It had begun that day. CJ had started experimenting with his
abilities and had rapidly found that they could be quite useful.
Suddenly he had that little extra for football, that great jump
for basketball, and a little more speed for track. It was fun,
really. He had a secret that made him different. On the other
hand, it bothered him that his family's safety was dependent on
secrecy. Clark had taught him from an early age that truth was to
be honored above all else, and he felt very much that he was
violating the good faith of his friends.

He kept his word to his father, and he told no one about his
abilities. He had to be cautious about using them so that he
wouldn't get caught. The hardest part was hiding himself from
Kat. She had always been his confidant. He could tell her
anything, but telling this would mean lying to his father. It
felt unnatural to keep something from Kat. He had shared with her
every joy and every hurt for as long as he could remember.
Usually, he told her things before even confiding in his parents.
At first, it was easy to hide the little changes. After all,
unless he had been actively looking for the abilities, he would
probably have dismissed them as a little extra athletic ability,
or just really good senses.

As time progressed, it became harder to hide the differences. He
wasn't just a little stronger, he was a *lot* stronger. He
wasn't exactly able to control all of the powers, especially as
teenage hormones began coursing through his system, so the
incidents where he could be caught became more frequent. What
worried him the most, though, was that Kat was noticing changes.
She mentioned frequently that his improvement in sports seemed
sudden, or his strength too great. Lately, it was harder to make
excuses when he could see things that she couldn't, or when he
heard things that she was unable to hear.

She was suspicious, but it was more than that. She made him feel
like he was betraying her trust. This was the most exciting thing
in his life, and he wanted to share it. He wanted her to be
excited with him. He had wondered for nearly a year whether it
was time to share his secret, then he became frightened for a
different reason. His father had told him that Mom had flipped
out when she figured it out on her own. Mom had felt betrayed
because he did let her in on the secret. Would it have been
different if Dad had told her?

It was with these thoughts that he had gone to Lois, early on a
Saturday morning. Clark had been up and out early handling a fire
near a gas station, and he had not returned yet. "Mom," CJ
began, "I need to ask a question."

Lois was still far from June Cleaver, but she took some pride in
managing her kitchen. She set two slices of buttered toast in
front of her son, and wiped crumbs off the counter with the other
hand. "What's up?"

"It's kind of serious," CJ began.

The tone of his voice was the trigger. She looked at him sharply
before sitting and waiting for the other shoe to drop. It was
definitely the voice -- the exact same voice that Clark used when
he was about to tell her something she really didn't want to
hear. With a fifteen-year-old boy, this could not be good.
Nightmare images of teen pregnancy, sexually transmitted
diseases, drug dependence, alcohol-induced stupors and failing
grades flashed through her mind in no particular order. This
could *not* be good. "Let's have it," she stated, with as much
confidence as twenty years of reporting could give her.

CJ saw the look on his mother's face and nearly smiled. She
really was expecting the worst. In a way, this would probably be
a relief. "It's not that bad, Mom. I just want to know
something about you and Dad."

"That doesn't sound terrible," Lois said with relief. Raising
a teenager was never easy, and CJ reminded her so much of Clark
that sometimes she just forgot he was a kid. "So, what do you
need to know?"

"Dad said you were mad when you found out about him." He
didn't have to elaborate on what Lois had found out. "Why were
you mad? Was it because of what he could do, or because he lied
to you?"

Lois pondered the question for a moment, searching for why he
needed to know this, and hoping that the knowledge would help
guide her answer. "Is there someone that you want to tell about
this?"

CJ's instant blush told her more than his hesitant words of
"...not really."

Lois smiled softly. She loved her son the most when he was so
like his father. They were linked in a way that they were just
beginning to understand, and she wondered how rocky that road
would be. "He never told me one of the most important things
about his life, and that hurt. I really think that it was more
embarrassment than anything else, though. I had said things to
Superman that I never wanted Clark to know, and that embarrassed
me. When I'm on the defensive, I do get angry. It's just a part
of me."

"So, would you have been as mad if he told you?"

"I really don't know. Like I said, it had more to do with my
embarrassment than his dishonesty. What he did was wrong, but he
did it for all the right reasons. He wanted to protect me, and
it's hard to stay mad at someone who is trying to keep you
safe."

"That really doesn't answer my question," CJ said with a
sigh.

"It didn't answer mine, either. Who is it you want to tell?"

This time, CJ's sigh was long and loud. "How do moms always
know everything?"

"With you, it isn't hard. I have spent almost twenty years
figuring out your father, and you have his eyes. Sometimes, I
swear I'm looking at him -- especially when you have something
to hide." Lois smiled and sat down in the chair next to her son
at their breakfast bar. "Is it Kat?"

"You *do* know everything!" he said with surprise.

"Not everything, but I know *you*. You've known her for years,
and I know you tell her everything. This must be hard for you."

"Yeah, it is. We don't do secrets. We never have, not about
anything. This is the biggest thing in my life, and I can't tell
my best friend. I know all the reasons why, but this is still
hard. I mean, I know she would never tell anyone. I can trust her
more than she can trust me, now."

"It's more than a matter of trust, CJ. If you tell your secret,
you tell your dad's. That isn't really your place."

"I know that. That's what makes it so hard. It's like I'm in
between Kat and Dad, like a tug-of-war, and I'm losing." The
anguish on his face made Lois hurt for him. He had such a soft
heart, and it was easily bruised. He had Clark's sense of honor,
and her impulsivity. She often wondered just how volatile this
combination would become.

"I can't tell you what to do. Maybe I should, but I won't. I
can tell you what your dad said, but you already know that. All I
can say is, just go with your heart on this. Remember, though,
that if she knows, she becomes a target. You'll be making *that*
decision, too."

***

It was with all this in his mind that CJ faced Kat across his
bed. She wanted to know, she had said so, and this was as good a
time as any. With the feeling that what he was doing was right,
but the result would be bad anyway, CJ dove in.

"We're both growing up, Kat. You know how you learn new stuff
about your parents all the time? Well, I learned something, and
it kind of affects me. It has me worried. I want to tell you
about it, but my parents told me not to." There! It was out in
the open, or sort of, and he had been totally honest. That had
been too easy.

"So, tell! You know all about *my* dysfunctional life. My dad
had an affair, my mom made herself sick and died, and my dad
makes a lousy mom. There's nothing you don't know about me. We
just don't have secrets."

"This is a big one, Kat. If I tell you, you might get hurt."
She needed to be forewarned.

"Oh, please! Quit with the melodramatics and just tell me
what's bugging you. It won't leave this room, I promise."

"Okay," CJ began. "You know how my folks are friends with
Superman?" That was a good start.

"Yeah, I got to meet him. So, what's the point?"

"My dad really *is* Superman."

"WHAT!"

"Don't shout! And don't tell anyone."

"Right, like I'd repeat *that*. CJ, come on, what's really
wrong? It's not like you to make things up, so I'll forgive
this whopper. But you need to tell me what's wrong."

"I'm not lying," CJ declared defensively.

"Right."

"My dad's Superman, and I have powers, too. Not like his. Not
yet. But they're getting better. I can outrun anyone except my
dad, and I can burn stuff by looking at it. And I can see through
stuff, too. My dad says I may be able to fly, but that comes
later."

Kat was stunned. She had never heard CJ utter so much as a fib,
and this was ridiculous. She couldn't figure out his motivation.
They always told each other the truth. Her life had been one big
soap opera, and she had always told him about it. For him to make
this up was insulting and hurtful. Her emotions had been
uncertain at best, lately, and this set them off once more. "CJ,
this isn't funny," she said quietly.

"Tell me about it!" CJ said in an exasperated voice. "Can I
just show you?"

She looked at him quizzically. This was getting out of hand. This
was out of the fib zone and into delusion. "I don't think
so."

Rolling his eyes, CJ did the first thing that came to the mind of
a fifteen-year-old boy. He concentrated and looked her over from
head to toe. "You have on a lacy pink bra and white underwear
with blue dots."

Kat's eyes flew open in shock. This was crazy! This couldn't be
right. Either he hadn't lied to her, or he had been peeking
looks in the girls' locker room. In any case, she'd had enough.
"CJ Kent, I never want to see you again in my life!" With that,
she marched out of his room, through the house, and left,
slamming the door behind her. CJ just stood there gaping. It
never occurred to Kat that she had been more melodramatic that
even CJ had seemed.

***

Life was not fair. CJ had learned that in a hurry. School was
out, he was finally old enough to drive, and he was miserable.
Life was really not fair.

CJ went back to the list his mom had given him of things to do,
and groaned. "Stop at the store, get milk, bread, and cake mix
for Grandma to make my cake, and remember to fill the car with
gas." CJ read the list aloud to be sure he wouldn't forget
anything, then grabbed his keys to the car on the way out the
front door.

CJ had been driving for six months. Because he had a job, he had
received his driver's license at fifteen rather than sixteen,
and his parents gave him full access to the truck. He liked
driving the small pick-up truck that his dad had fixed up for
him. His only responsibilities were to keep it in gas and pay his
own insurance. It seemed reasonable to him, and much more fair
than what most of his friends were dealing with.

Kat had always liked driving around with him.

Kat... bad thought... and just when he was feeling almost normal
again.

Kat had spoken to him only briefly in the last several weeks. She
had explained that she did believe him, but she was no longer
comfortable having him for a friend. The entire "alien" issue
had her seriously confused, and she was still angry that he
hadn't told her the truth right away. This was part of the
reason CJ just didn't care about his birthday this weekend. What
good was a party when your best friend wasn't there?

He did look forward to the visit from his grandparents. He loved
Grandma Martha in a way that he couldn't put into words. She was
always on his side in any argument, and they had forged a bond
that he didn't begin to understand, but couldn't live without.

Grandpa Jon was a lot of fun. They could talk about anything, and
CJ never had to worry about it getting back to his parents. Maybe
he would ask to go back to Smallville this summer. He had helped
out on the farm a couple of summers, and he always enjoyed the
break from his parents. It would also get him away from the
tension of having Kat mad at him. He just couldn't deal with
that. Yes, that's what he would ask for on his birthday. He
would miss some work but, other than that, he had no reason to
stay here this summer.

After finishing the errands his mom had requested, and switching
out her car for his truck, he went back into the small town of
Claremont. He drove by the convenience mart where Kat worked,
twice, before he got up the nerve to stop. Entering the store, he
waited for Kat to finish with a customer before walking up to the
counter. "What's up?"

"Not much." Kat kept her eyes down. She had been avoiding him
since the incident in his bedroom. It really bothered her that CJ
wasn't entirely human. Like every other teenage girl on the
planet, she had a fair-sized crush on Superman, and realizing
that the hero was the father of her best friend had given her a
major case of the weirds. She had rarely given Mr. Kent more than
a passing glance, other than to consider him a better father than
her own; thinking of him in *that* way made her feel really
uncomfortable.

"I wondered if you got the invitation to my party," CJ said
quietly.

"I got it," she replied. "I don't think I can come. I may
have to work."

"Okay. I get it." CJ turned to leave, then turned back around.
He scanned the store quickly to ensure that it was free of
customers, then he faced Kat once more. "Actually, I *don't*
get it! You have been my best friend since I can remember. You
haven't missed one of my birthdays since I turned six, and if
you don't come, it isn't because you have to work, it's
because you don't *want* to come! I'm sick of you being so damn
polite when I talk to you. If you're mad at me, then fine, but
admit it! If you hate me, I'm sorry, but I can't change what I
said or didn't say. I'm doing my best here to be a friend, and
I can't change who I am just for you." CJ finally ran out of
steam and walked to the door. Before he left the store, he fired
a parting shot. "I may not have done everything right, but I was
always your friend. I really thought you were mine."

Kat managed to watch CJ leave the store, get into his truck, and
drive away. Once he was out of sight, she calmly walked to the
door and locked it, and then returned to her place behind the
counter. It was with his words ringing in her ears that she began
to cry, sinking down to the floor behind the counter so nobody
passing by on the street would be able to see her.

***

CJ's sixteenth birthday was thoroughly depressing. He moped in
his room most of the day, coming out only when Martha served the
cake that she had made for him. CJ ate the cake, smiled politely
when he thanked her, and promptly went back to his room to mope.
There had been no party. CJ had only given out one invitation,
and when that had been refused, he had torn up the rest and
decided not to bother.

"I'm getting worried about him," Lois told Clark as they
shared the job of filling the dishwasher in the kitchen. CJ had
refused to eat dinner, and Lois had refused to listen to Clark's
assurances that CJ most likely would not suffer from one lost
meal. For that matter, they didn't even know if CJ required
food. Clark didn't, but Lois most certainly did. They assumed
that CJ fell somewhere in the middle, as he did with so many
other things. "He won't eat, he doesn't sleep. Clark, he's
going to make himself sick."

"Lois, you need to relax. He's just a teenage boy who got his
feelings hurt. He'll bounce back; he always has."

"But he's always had Kat to run to. He needs her, now, and
she's the problem."

Clark looked at his wife with a wry grin. He smiled at her has he
lifted his palm to cup her cheek in a familiar gesture. "Lois,
she's reacting the same way you did."

Lois pressed her face against Clark's hand for a moment, then
she moved back. "I'm not proud of that, you know."

Clark expanded his grin into a true, heart-stopping smile. "I
realize that. I just think that we need to give Kat some time.
You came around, and so will she. Besides, this can't be easy on
her. It isn't just CJ that she has to get used to, it's me,
too. The few times I've run into her since this started, she
can't even look me in the eye."

Lois sighed, "At the very least, I think the secret is safe with
her. If she isn't willing to talk about it with us, I doubt
she'll spread it around. Besides, she thinks too much of CJ for
that. She may be hurt and angry, but she won't hurt him. I trust
her."

"Now, that's something. You don't trust anyone," Clark said
with a smile.

Martha entered the kitchen carrying the remainder of the dinner
dishes for Lois and Clark to wash. "I know it's not my place,
but I really want to talk to you about CJ."

Jonathan and Martha had immediately noticed that their grandson
was not himself. While Clark had explained on the phone that CJ
was "a little depressed", and the reasons for that depression,
Martha had been unprepared for the desolation she saw in his
face. CJ had been a part of her heart from the moment she had
held him. She had always felt a strange attachment to the child,
and she assumed that it came from his resemblance to Clark.
Jonathan, too, had been drawn to the child more than one would
have expected, even considering that this was their only
grandchild. Initially, they had assumed that it was the fear of
losing him to his own time that had intensified their reactions
to the child, but that thought had been pushed to the back of
their minds for years now. They had given up waiting for the
impending arrival of some time traveler that would carry CJ away,
and had learned to enjoy each moment as it came. On the other
hand, they had never entirely forgotten, and their attachment to
him had never lessened.

"Jonathan and I have been talking, and we were wondering if a
change in scenery might get CJ back to normal," Martha offered.

"You mean, take him back to Smallville?" Lois inquired.

"Well, yes. We've had him there before, and he seemed to enjoy
the time with us. He loves to explore the farm, and Jonathan
could really use the help." Martha frowned, wondering how to be
more convincing. The truth was, she just felt the need to spend
some time with her grandson. "I know that he's working now, but
he can write at our house as easily as here, and the stories
might even be better. He could always e-mail them to you."

Lois considered the suggestion carefully. CJ's column in the
paper was a teenage perspective section that was designed to
increase the circulation of the paper by reaching the younger
audiences. He had shown Clark's flair for words, and his writing
was unbelievably good, considering his lack of experience. It was
true that he could write from anywhere, and his comparisons of
farm life to city life could be as interesting as the series he
had done last summer on the differences of city life to suburban
living. He had an amazing analytical mind, and the potential for
a good story was always there. In addition, Martha was right
about getting his mind off Kat. The boy had lost his best friend,
literally. Perhaps removal from the immediate situation would be
a good thing.

Clark's reasoning had followed the same pattern as his wife's.
He had watched her face run the gamut of emotions as she
considered sending their son away for the summer. This was always
hard for her. The first time, back when CJ had been only nine,
they had sent him to Smallville for purely occupational reasons.
Lois had been promoted to Editor-in-Chief of the Daily Planet
after Perry's failing health had mandated his retirement. While
she was more than capable of running the paper, the initial
adjustment in time management had threatened their marriage and
undermined her confidence in her ability to parent CJ. The
two-month-long break that the Kents had provided had allowed her
to get together a routine that did allow her time for family.

While Perry had insisted that it was impossible to have both,
Lois managed to do so with her determination to have it all.
Within a few weeks, she had established a daily pattern that
included a home computer, cellphone, and message system. She had
also delegated authority to two junior executives to eliminate
the constant nightly phone calls that had plagued her. Finally,
when the system she devised was working perfectly, they had
brought CJ home to a much happier arrangement and found that the
whole family, Martha and Jonathan included, had benefited from
the situation.

CJ had spent two other summers, and one Christmas break, with his
grandparents. He loved the time with them, and he learned so much
from the older values that Martha and Jonathan instilled. This
really wouldn't be any different, Lois decided. He would spend a
few weeks with them, and by the time school started in September,
CJ would be back to normal. Hopefully, by then Kat would have
resolved this confusion she had, and they could go back to being
friends.

"That really may be a great idea, Martha," Lois said. Turning
to her husband, she inquired, "What do you think?"

"I think it's perfect. Now we just have to talk him into it."

"That shouldn't be too hard," Jonathan said, as he walked into
the kitchen with CJ behind him. "CJ just asked me how to talk
you guys into letting him spend the summer with us."

"It's all I want for my birthday," CJ added.

"Well, then," Martha said with a smile, "it looks like you're
coming home with us."

***

Lois helped CJ to pack, and Clark and Jonathan loaded his things
into the car. Because CJ had wanted to take his truck, Clark had
offered to drive his parents' car for Martha, while Jonathan
would ride with CJ. Normally, Martha and Jonathan would have come
to Claremont by "Superman Express", but this time they had
impulsively decided to drive. The scenery as they traveled
through the mountains of West Virginia was beautiful along I-64,
and they had decided it would be fun to just drive. Under the
circumstances, they were glad for the decision. CJ would be
happier taking his truck to the farm, and this trip would provide
Clark time to talk with Martha, and Jonathan time to talk with
CJ.

At the moment, however, Lois was feeling decidedly left out. As
her family piled into the vehicles, she regretted the
responsibilities that would keep her near the Daily Planet for
the night. It was at times like this she really wanted to skip
being an editor, and go back to just being a simple reporter.
Odd, she had thought she had worked through this. Yet here she
was, having just celebrated her sixth anniversary as
Editor-in-Chief, and still having difficulty with the
responsibilities of the job. Some things would never change.

"I'll be back before morning," Clark whispered in her ear as
he hugged her good-bye.

"I know," Lois smiled weakly. "I just feel like I'm missing
something, and I can't shake it."

"I'll miss you."

"I know. I love you."

"I love you too, Lois. I'll be back as soon as I can." With a
last lingering kiss, Clark left Lois standing on the porch,
waving at her family as they drove away.

Lois had said the rest of her good-byes in the house, so she was
surprised how bereft she felt at the moment. She knew they needed
her, and knew she was loved. At the Planet she was irreplaceable
(as they informed her frequently) but, at home, she often felt
like a fifth wheel. Perhaps it was because Clark and CJ had this
new bond from sharing powers that nobody else had, or maybe it
was just that CJ was growing up and needed less direct
intervention. She missed playing "mom" to Kat as well. Lately,
she wondered just how important she really was in the grand
scheme of things. Oh well, she decided, this mood could be cured
by only one thing. Moments later, she settled herself in front of
the television with a pint of cookie dough ice cream and put in a
favorite video. If she wasn't necessary, she would just have to
enjoy herself.

***

Chapter 2

CJ had been on the farm for nearly three weeks when he finally
started opening up to his grandparents. It wasn't that he
didn't want to talk to them; he just couldn't seem to find a
starting point. They hadn't been kidding about the amount of
help Jonathan needed on the farm. CJ was constantly utilizing his
powers to toss hay bails and clean equipment. He lacked his
father's skill with repairs, but Jonathan gave good directions,
and they even managed to fix some of the larger pieces of
equipment working together.

Time with Martha was also a joy. Despite CJ's lingering
depression, he couldn't help but feel better about life when he
was with his grandmother. She cooked and cleaned for him, and he
was on his own for finding ways to keep busy. When Jonathan
wasn't around, he often helped around the house with the heavier
cleaning chores, and even occasionally with cooking. He became
adept at flipping pancakes, and he gradually mastered the art of
blueberry waffles.

CJ made another strange discovery. It seemed that, the more he
used his newfound strength and speed, the easier it became to
control the unique abilities. He was able to lift and carry
greater amounts on a daily basis, and he seemed to get faster by
the day as well. The wide open area of the farm allowed him more
freedom to experiment, and the experimentation resulted in
increased abilities. He discovered that his hearing was more than
acute. He was able to hear his grandparents' discussions in the
house, all the way from the barn. He could pick up their
heartbeats if he was close enough, and he never missed his
grandmother calling him in to dinner, wherever he was on the
farm.

His vision continued to develop as well. He was able to find his
grandfather from quite a distance, and he was starting to be able
to see through walls. He could heat objects (which came in handy
for branding and welding), and only started a few accidental
fires in the process. His strength became easier to control with
practice. He was less apt to crush objects accidentally now, and
yet he was able to deliberately crush bricks, rocks and some
metals with more skill than before. He could outrun the horses on
a nearby farm, and had no difficulty catching the chickens to
remove them from the hen-house for cleaning.

CJ's comfort with his abilities was directly related to his
grandparents' encouragement of his learning to use them. They
seemed to naturally know what he needed, and when he needed it.
He supposed it came from raising his dad. They had been through
this once before, and Martha was the first to admit that the
previous experience was a help. They'd had no idea how to help
Clark when he began to differ from the children around him, but
they had those mistakes to learn from and were eager to use their
knowledge to help their only grandson.

When CJ finally felt ready to talk about his life, his
grandmother was more than willing to listen. She didn't
interrupt as he told her of his decade long friendship with Kat,
and the pain involved in losing that relationship. CJ eloquently
expressed his fears for the future, realizing that if he was
unable to maintain an established friendship, initiating new ones
would be difficult. He cried as he told Martha about Kat storming
out of the house and refusing to come to his party, then he
cuddled in her arms as she held him, crying with him as she had
done with Clark many years before, sittting on the floor of the
"Fortress of Solitude." Martha had been through this once
before, but she realized now that CJ had an advantage in the
situation that Clark had never had. CJ had Clark. Simply, he had
the benefit of not being alone in the world.

Martha was not so naive as to believe that Clark was the perfect
father. He certainly tried but, just as she and Jonathan had made
their fair share of mistakes, she was absolutely sure that Clark
had made his share of goofs along the way. Nevertheless, Clark
and CJ shared something that could be wonderful if they could
breach the father/son gap of generations and get together on
this. Martha told CJ as much, and was surprised when it initiated
a fresh wave of tears from the boy.

"I know he loves me and all," CJ told her through the tears.
"But this is my fault. He told me not to tell anyone because
this could happen. I did it anyway, and that makes it my
fault."

"CJ, your father has never been one to hold a grudge. Was he
that angry when you told Kat?"

"He wasn't really mad, he just got this disappointed look, you
know. It was like he was too hurt to be mad, and that made it
worse."

"Oh, sweetie," Martha soothed. "Your father has been through
so much in his life. He was trying to save you that hurt, but he
can't protect you from everything. If he was hurt, it was
because *you* were hurting."

"But he never even talked to me about it."

"That's because he's a man," Martha said with some
exasperation at the male of the species. "He may be the sweetest
boy in the world, but he still expects everyone else to read his
mind. He was probably waiting for you to come to him -- and if
I'm right, he's just as disappointed that you haven't talked
this out as you are."

CJ wiped his face and sat up straight. "You really think so? You
think he wants to talk about this."

"I'm sure of it. Honey, he loves you. You and your mother are
the most important things in his life, and you always will be. He
wants to know everything about you, and this is even more special
because it's something that only the two of you can share. Even
your mother can't quite be in on this, although she has some
experience with learning to use super-powers."

"What do you mean?"

Martha smiled, happy that she had apparently cheered her
grandson, "Now, *that* is something your mother will have to
explain."

CJ conceded that argument with a smile, and kissed his
grandmother on the cheek before walking out into the yard to help
his grandfather with a tractor that had gotten stuck in the mud.
CJ had been trying to tighten the faucet handle enough to stop
the consistent drip that had formed an inconvenient puddle under
the faucet when the entire faucet had come off in his hand. By
the time he had found Jonathan, and the laughing twosome had
turned off the main water valve long enough for CJ to weld the
faucet closed, the entire front yard had been flooded. Yesterday,
they had spent the day installing a new pipe and faucet to
replace the one that CJ had destroyed inadvertently, and today
they needed to get the tractor out of the muddy yard and plant a
new crop of grass to replace what had been drowned by the
incident.

Jonathan directed CJ as he carefully maneuvered the large piece
of farm equipment out of the mud hole and onto firmer ground. He
was not able to lift the entire unit, but he could pick up
various wheels on the tractor and tilt it while he shifted it out
of the water. He was extremely careful during the process, taking
each of his grandfather's suggestions to heart, and hoping that
he would not do any additional damage in the process.

For his part, Jonathan made sure that CJ maneuvered the tractor
onto hard-packed dirt, and that he didn't hurt himself in the
process. He kept up a running commentary on what CJ was doing,
interspersed with funny stories of Clark's similar accidents
during the initial development of his powers. CJ was relieved to
see that Jonathan had quite a sense of humor regarding the
incident, and was also relieved that his father had made
mistakes, too.

It was a common misconception among teenagers that their parents
had never made mistakes. Jonathan realized that the awkwardness
that CJ was demonstrating was more than just an adjustment to
super-powers. He was in the unnatural state of being in between
adult and child and, regardless of his physical abilities, that
was a hard place to be. He was dealing with adolescence as well
as could be expected, Jonathan supposed, and he would handle the
situation better with time.

When Jonathan quizzed CJ on his conversations with Martha, he was
surprised at the answer he got. With a huge smile, his grandson
relayed Martha's ideas that Clark would be a wonderful resource
for him and that they shared something really special. It was a
new concept for CJ, the idea of "different" being a good thing.
He had spent most of his life learning to fit in, and permission
to be different from those around him was a relief. He had taken
a lot of flak for being a writer when his athletic abilities were
so promising, and it had been hard to follow his heart on the
matter. Certainly his parents had been encouraging -- and, of
course, Kat -- but that was where the support had stopped.

Other students had always growled when he threw off the bell
curve with his test scores, and his true enjoyment of writing had
earned him condescending looks from even the teachers. Half of
them seemed to think he was simply trying to impress them, while
the other half spend so much time trying to make him live up to
his imaginary "potential" that they had devised that he had
nearly begun to hate school.

Kat had always seemed to be able to encourage him when the
teachers really got on his nerves. She had a way of understanding
what he needed, and when he needed it. Sometimes she had used
jokes or stories to pull him out of his bad moods, but more often
she used a rare sarcastic wit that challenged him on another
level than school. Keeping up with her mood swings lately had
been an additional challenge, yet he seemed to manage. If it
hadn't been for the Superman thing, he would most likely be with
her now. They always kept each other busy over the summers.

Two years ago, when he had come to visit his grandparents, Kat
had been allowed to come along. It had been that summer that
Katie Lynn had ceased to be, and Kat the tomboy had truly taken
over. She had changed that summer from the pristine little girl
that her mother had encouraged into a tough little scrapper who
could play baseball, football and even hockey. She had become his
equal in many ways, able to keep up with him on a physical level
while occasionally surpassing his mental abilities.

Little Katie had grown up. She had climbed trees, milked cows,
and ran through fields with no dress in sight. Martha had sewn
her two jumpers to replace the dresses she had ruined, and had
bought her the first pair of running shoes that she had owned.
Kat had abandoned the girlish nickname that had followed her
since birth, and decided that she was not yet ready for the
formal "Kathryn" that was on her birth certificate. It was that
summer, when she had barely turned fourteen, that she had truly
captured the hearts of the Kents. This little spitfire reminded
them of Lois in her spirit and energy, and they were touched by
her presence.

CJ had loved that summer. He had been so afraid that he would
lose his best friend to the inevitable changes of puberty. Most
of his male friends seemed to fade away at the first sign of a
girlfriend, and the few friends that were girls were only
interested in a boyfriend. CJ wasn't ready for the whole
boy-girl relationship idea, and he was grateful to find that Kat
shared his ideas about staying friends. It wasn't that he
didn't want a girlfriend, just that he wasn't ready to deal
with the concept yet.

CJ sighed loudly as he glanced over the yard. With the tractor
out of the way, it was impossible not to see how much damage had
been done to the grass. It was simply a muddy mess from where CJ
stood. He couldn't believe that he had done all of this in just
a few minutes. One second of misjudged strength would take weeks
of growth to repair.

"I'm sorry, Grandpa Jon. I didn't mean to do this."

"I know that, son. We'll get it fixed up soon. Why don't you
use that rake to even out the mud, and we'll let the sun dry it
out for the next couple of days. We can reseed it later, for now
I just want to get it level."

"Okay. I'll give it a try." With that, CJ quickly (very
quickly) raked out the worst of the hills and valleys of the
yard, and left a relatively even surface. It was still quite wet,
but it would dry quickly in the July heat. CJ stood back and
surveyed his work. "How's that?"

"Clark couldn't have done it any better."

CJ smiled at what was so obviously a compliment. He liked being
compared to his dad. He liked being *like* his dad. With pride in
his voice, he offered to bring his grandfather a drink. Jonathan
smiled at the boy and asked for some of the lemonade he had seen
Martha making earlier.

CJ came back from the kitchen with two large plastic tumblers of
lemonade. He was happy to help out his grandparents, even in
small ways. They were getting older, well into their seventies,
and it worried him that they might not always be here for him. He
always felt so safe here, so loved and accepted. It was a feeling
that he had always had, ever since he was a tiny child. There was
something about this couple that was also a part of him. Being
with them was just a pleasure. He simply could not understand the
friends he'd had who complained about their grandparents. His
were wonderful, and he was aware that this was a time to be
treasured.

"Good, lemonade. Thanks for bringing it out," Jonathan said as
he sat down on the porch steps.

"You're welcome."

"So, what's the deal with your girlfriend?"

"Well, she's not my girlfriend."

Jonathan turned to look at his grandson as he sat beside him on
the steps. "Is that the problem?"

"Nah. She has a problem with me being half alien."

Jonathan's eyes flew open at that remark. "Do you?"

CJ sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. Then he replied,
"I'm not sure. I never really thought about it. I like being
the same as Dad, and it's cool to be able to do stuff, but I get
tired of having to hide everything that I can do."

Jonathan nodded in understanding. "Your dad used to feel the
same way."

"I'm already different than everyone else. I like to read and
write, and I'm better at sports without really trying. Some of
the kids don't like me because my grades are too good. It's
like I just can't win. The only person who ever really liked me
-- the only kid, I mean -- was Kat. Now she's not even talking
to me. I feel pretty alone."

"Your dad spent most of his life that way. In fact, until he met
your mother, I don't think he ever told anyone about his
secret."

"I just really thought that Kat would understand. I knew she
would be mad because I didn't tell her right away, and maybe the
way I told her wasn't the best, but she was my best friend. Best
friends aren't supposed to just stop liking you when you do
something wrong." CJ paused before continuing. "Besides, it's
not like I can help the 'alien' thing. I can't make my dad
from Earth any more than she can make her dad stop drinking. You
don't get to pick your parents, and I'd rather have my dad than
hers any day."

"It sounds like you and Kat need to talk this out."

"But I told you, she's not talking to me. She wouldn't even
come to my party."

"CJ, your party was over a month ago. Have you called her since
you came here?"

"No. I'm afraid to."

Jonathan looked up in surprise, and said, "Now, why would you be
afraid to talk to your best friend?"

CJ closed his eyes and thought for a moment. He wasn't sure how
to put his fears into words, but he owed his grandfather some
sort of explanation. "As long as I don't talk to her, I guess I
can think she will talk to me someday. If I try, and she won't
listen, then I know I've lost her. I don't think I can stand to
lose my best friend."

Jonathan smiled at the sincerity in his grandson's voice. The
child apparently had thought of little else since he had come
here, and his thoughts were clearer than he realized.
Unfortunately, denial was not going to get him back together with
his friend. "Go call her, son. You need to know if you're going
to move on. This way, if she won't talk, you can have some time
here to get used to the idea before you have to go home. If she
does talk to you, you can relax and enjoy the rest of your
summer."

"That makes too much sense," CJ told his grandfather. They met
each other's eyes, and then they both began to laugh. Sometimes,
the answer was just so simple.

***

Chapter 3

Kat was just walking into her bedroom when she heard the phone.
She flopped over the end of the bed, and answered on the third
ring. "Hello?"

There was silence on the line, then a small voice, "Uh, hi."

Kat was somehow not surprised to hear a voice all the way from
Kansas. "How's the vacation?"

"Quiet. Working some for Grandpa, but mostly just reading. He
makes me write every afternoon for an hour and send it in to
Mom."

"What are you writing about?"

"Mostly the farm stuff. How to milk cows and clean chicken
coops. I'm putting together a story on country life for the
column, but that's about all."

"Sounds pretty good to me. Does your grandma still make those
blueberry waffles?"

Yeah. She taught me how, too."

With that, Kat made a decision that eased her mind and quelled
her conscience. "Maybe you could show me how when you get
home?"

All the way from Kansas, the catch could be heard in CJ's voice
when he replied with a simple, "I'd really like that." He knew
Kat would probably hear the sniffles, but that really didn't
matter to him. She had seen him cry before, and most likely would
again. "I can't talk long. I don't want the bill too high for
Grandma and Grandpa."

"Okay. I just wanted to say that, well, I'm sorry. I'm really
sorry, CJ. I miss you."

He could hear that she was crying, too. In a small way, it made
him feel a little better that she missed him. He wouldn't tell
her that, of course, but he felt better just the same. "I miss
you, too, Kat."

"When are you coming home?"

"Soon. Maybe Grandpa will let me drive back next week. I really
want to talk to you."

"Me too, CJ. Me too."

"Good-bye, Kat."

"'Bye, CJ."

When CJ hung up the phone, he felt a thousand pounds lighter. He
had no idea what was going on in Kat's head at the moment, but
she missed him as much as he missed her, and that gave him hope.

***

CJ spent most of the next day cleaning up the room he had been
staying in (his father's old room) and loading the cab of his
truck with the necessities for a long trip. His Grandmother
prepared him a huge batch of brownies to take home to his mother,
and several other tasty snacks for himself. Once the truck was
ready to go, he spent what was left of the day with his
grandfather.

CJ had always enjoyed spending time at the farm, and the last
several weeks had been fun, but he wanted to be back at home with
Kat. Now that he knew she didn't hate him, he was anxious to get
back into his relationship with his best friend. Jonathan
understood CJ's need, and tolerated the decision with good
humor. Frankly, Jonathan had expected CJ to become bored with the
farm before this time, and that would have happened if CJ hadn't
spent so much time developing his abilities while he was there.

Martha insisted that CJ wait until the next morning to leave for
Metropolis. She had a great deal of confidence in his driving
skills, and she was willing to allow him to make the drive alone,
but she did not want him making the drive in the dark. CJ was
disappointed that he would have to wait, but he was indeed proud
that his grandparents would let him make the drive without his
father at all. Martha and Jonathan had always been more
supportive of his independence than his parents, but he believed
that this was because they had already raised their child, and
understood the value of independence. It wasn't that Lois or
Clark was stifling, just that they were protective.

When the morning came, and all the good-byes were said, CJ drove
back to his home in Claremont. He was tired, but proud, when he
arrived at home just before dark, and he was also glad to see his
parents. He spent a great deal of time telling them about his
adventures on the farm, and explaining how his powers were
developing. Clark made a point to remind him of keeping the
abilities secret, but CJ was already learning to cover his
increasing strength and speed.

Once his parents were finished quizzing him, CJ made his way into
his bedroom. He spent a few minutes writing in his journal, then
he picked up his phone. He had been waiting all day to make this
call, and he couldn't wait any longer.

Kat answered on the third ring, "Hello?"

"Hey, Kat. I'm home now." CJ was stumbling over his words. He
suddenly felt so stupid.

"That's great. How was your trip?"

"It was cool," CJ stumbled. "I guess I'm tired, but it was
fun coming back by myself. I didn't feel so much like a baby."

"Is something wrong, CJ?"

CJ squirmed a bit more, "No. I don't think so. I'm just
tired."

"Well, maybe you should get some sleep, then."

"I guess so. Good night, Kat."

"'Night, CJ."

CJ hung up the phone feeling confused and shaken. He had always
been able to talk to Kat, and he didn't know what the problem
was. It wasn't supposed to make a difference, this change in his
life. Kat had apparently dealt with it, and it wasn't bothering
her any more. At least, she hadn't mentioned it. *He* was the
one who was feeling uncomfortable and awkward. He supposed it was
probably from the argument as much as anything, but that didn't
make sense, either. They had argued many times in the last few
years, usually over small things, and when they were speaking
again, things went right back to normal. He couldn't figure out
why this felt so different.

He had been so anxious to get back to see her. It amazed him that
now, when he was here, he had no idea what to say. He didn't
know if he should bring up the subject, or work around it. He
didn't want to make her uncomfortable and, in the process, his
caution was making him miserable. She was his best friend, and he
should be able to talk to her. That was, after all, what had
started this whole mess in the beginning. He had just wanted to
share this part of his life with her. Now, he just wished it
could all go away, and go back to the way it had been. At the
very least, he realized why his father had kept secrets for so
many years.

CJ finally managed to reign in his wandering thoughts enough to
get ready for bed. He brushed his teeth, found his shorts in his
suitcase, and dressed for bed. Before lying down, he crept out
into the hall and down to his parents' room. He paused a moment
at their closed door, considering, then he knocked quietly.

After a moment, his father's voice called out, rather
breathless, "What do you need, CJ?"

"I just wanted to say good night."

CJ heard rustling, then was startled when his mother opened the
door. She enveloped him in the kind of hug that he had loved as a
child, and tolerated as an adolescent. CJ hugged back, as much
for his own pleasure as for hers.

"I missed you, sweetie."

"I missed you, too, Mom."

"Good night, son," Clark called, still in the bed.

"'Night, Dad."

While CJ headed back to his room, Lois climbed back into her bed
next to Clark. "That was unusual," she remarked. "Usually, I
have to hold him down to get a hug -- or even a 'good night',
for that matter."

"Maybe he missed us," Clark mused, as he put his arm around his
wife's waist. He tugged gently, pulling her into the cradle of
his body. He sighed softly as she wiggled her bottom into his
groin. "You keep that up, and I'll have to finish what we
started before CJ came in."

"Well," Lois smiled, "you do what you have to do." She
wiggled her bottom against him once more for emphasis.

"You do know how to get into trouble, don't you?" Clark
grinned broadly as Lois looked over her shoulder at him.

"I do try," she assured him with a kiss. "I do try."

***

The next morning, CJ was up with the sun. He put away the clothes
that he had taken to Smallville, then he made his way into the
kitchen.

"You're early," Lois commented.

"I didn't eat much dinner," CJ replied as he grabbed an apple
out of the bowl on the table. "I figured if I got up early
enough, Dad might make breakfast."

"Sorry, sweetie. Your dad had to leave early."

"Is there a problem at the paper?"

Lois considered a moment before answering her son. They had never
liked lying to him about Clark's mysterious disappearances, but
it had become a habit. It would have been impossible to trust a
small child with the secret. CJ had an incredible pride in his
father to begin with; if they had added the knowledge that his
father was really Superman, it would have spread trough the
sandbox and into the schoolyard within days. They had begun
making the excuses quite early, and then it had been a matter of
not knowing when it would be appropriate to tell him the truth.
When Clark had finally revealed the truth to CJ, it had changed
the situation. They no longer had to lie to him, but Lois was
still unsure how much of the truth to tell him.

"There was a problem, but it wasn't with the paper," she
explained. "He heard something on the television that he heeded
to check out."

"Oh," CJ said, quietly. He seemed to forget that his father was
Superman. He knew about his father's powers, that much was easy
to take, but he had thought about Superman as another person for
so long that he found it impossible to combine the two images in
his mind. "I guess that means I'm cooking breakfast, then."

"You and your father! You won't let me *near* a kitchen," Lois
said with a smile.

CJ returned her grin and replied, "That's because we value our
health."

Lois smacked her son playfully, marveling for a moment how much
he was like his father. He had the same sense of humor and the
same gentle manner. He was beginning to look like his father as
well, and, as he stood in front of the stove frying French toast,
she was stunned. Dressed only in the shorts he had slept in, he
clearly showed that his body was becoming more adult than she had
realized. She wondered just how long she would have to wait
before she had to really become worried about him.

He had always been a beautiful child. His wide brown eyes and
wavy dark hair should have looked decidedly average, but, on him,
it did not. He had grown quite handsome in the last few years,
and she was beginning to develop a motherly concern about his
life. He was a good boy, true, but he was just a boy. The
challenges of development were becoming greater by the day, and
while she didn't worry about drugs or alcohol, she *did* worry
about girls. CJ had excellent judgment, and was well able to
decide what was not safe. He had a wonderful rapport with his
parents and was able to tell them anything. But how would he
react when girls started falling all over him?

Lois had expressed her concern to Clark a few months ago, and he
had just shrugged it off. Clark had never had difficulty fielding
the advances of the women around him. He had been polite, but
made it clear that he wasn't really interested. Clark assumed
that CJ would have that same tact, combined with the knowledge of
when and where to use it. Lois wasn't quite so sure. She had
fallen into too many bad relationships, and she didn't want CJ
to do the same. While he normally did show good judgment, he
*was* only a boy.

Lois set her concern aside for a moment as she watched her son
fix the breakfast. Fortunately, he also had his father's ability
in the kitchen. Lois was certainly pleased with this as well. CJ
was going to be a wonderful man, just as wonderful as his father.
She was sure of it. She gratefully accepted the plate when he
offered it, and enjoyed the meal before getting dressed for
work.

CJ accepted his mother's departure with good grace. Since he had
turned twelve, he had been what was termed as a "latch-key kid"
during the summers. He didn't mind the label, or the
responsibility. He enjoyed having the time alone to write, and,
if it was unusual that a young boy didn't look for ways to get
into trouble, CJ wasn't aware of it. He valued his parents'
opinions, and he worked hard to earn their respect. He had
learned earlier than most teenagers that respect was a two-way
street, and if he wanted his parents to allow him to do as he
wished, he needed to make his decisions responsibly.

CJ quickly cleaned up the kitchen and put the dishes in the
dishwasher. Glancing at the clock, he saw that Kat should be
awake by now, and he went to his room to change. As he entered
the room, he saw Kat sliding his window open from the outside.

"Need something?"

Kat jumped at least a foot, hitting her head on the window. She
glared at CJ with a typically evil look. "You could warn a
person, you know." She pulled her other leg through the window
and up onto the window ledge, leaving behind the large tree limb
that had served as her ladder up into CJ's room.

"Maybe, but it wouldn't be nearly as much fun." Somehow,
seeing her there, joking like she had always done, reassured him
that their relationship was not irrevocably damaged. It restored
his comfort with her as nothing else could.

CJ reached down to help her through the window. He placed his
hands on her sides, and just lifted. Kat came quickly through the
window, and found herself sitting on the ledge.

She studied her friend for a moment, vaguely surprised that he
looked the same as he always did. It wasn't that she had
expected him to grow horns or anything, but her perception of him
had changed enough that she almost expected to see a physical
difference.

"Thanks," she told him, "You really are strong."

"I guess I am," he answered, even though it really wasn't a
question. After a moment, with concern, he asked, "Does that
bother you?"

Kat shifted uncomfortably. She looked up at him, but failed to
allow her green eyes to meet his. He had been her best friend
forever, but she was still dealing with the fact that he had lied
to her. "How strong *are* you?" she asked.

"Well, I'm not bench pressing cars, yet. My dad says he could
do that at my age. I guess I'm pretty strong, though."

"But you can't fly?"

"Not yet."

Too bad," she offered. "That would be really neat."

"I guess it would. Maybe I'll have my dad take me. I never
really thought about it before." He moved to sit next to her on
the window ledge, and leaned his head back against the window.

"So, you don't even know what you can do yet?"

CJ sighed. He had known the questions were inevitable; he had
even looked forward to them at first. He liked the idea of
sharing his discoveries with a friend. His fear was that soon,
the abilities were all she would be able to see. It was his hope
that discussing this with Kat would help him sort it all out, but
that just didn't seem to be happening. In fact, the more she
questioned, the less sure of himself he became.

"My dad says that we have to learn as we go. I'm different than
anyone else because I'm only half from Krypton, so there's no
way to tell what I will turn out like."

Kat considered the information for a moment. She had to keep
reminding herself that this was her best friend. He kept throwing
out terms and ideas that had no place in her orderly life, and
she wasn't sure how to take it. CJ was not the person that she
had always known, and that would take some getting used to.

"Let's start with what you can do. What's the coolest thing,
so far?"

CJ thought about it for a moment. He had mixed feelings about his
abilities. He appreciated the strength and speed, of course, but
he wasn't sure that was the best thing. He liked being able to
start fires with his sight, and hear his mother calling from a
mile away, but they weren't the best thing, either. Further, he
wasn't sure he had explored all of his abilities yet, and the
best might be yet to come. "It's cool to see through things,"
he told her. "I can tell who's on the other side of a door
before I open it, and I can see if there are fish in the water
before I choose a place to set up my fishing pole. Yeah, I guess
the best is the vision."

"You can see through anything but lead, right?" Kat asked,
remembering what she had read about Superman.

"Yeah. But most metals give me a little trouble. Dad said that
might get better with time."

"Can you see like that all the time?" Kat asked as she stood
and crossed the room to sit on the edge of his bed.

"Not all the time," he answered. "I have to concentrate on it,
really think hard. Even then, if I'm tired, it kind of fades in
and out, like looking through a veil or something."

"So, you can't always see through my clothes?" Kat finally
addressed her primary area of concern. After all, it was
uncomfortable enough to have your best friend be a boy, without
wondering if he was literally undressing you all the time.

CJ smiled, then laughed, not realizing that Kat had developed an
angry expression on her face. "I only did it to prove a point,
Kat. I don't care what color girls' underwear are."

"It's not my underwear I'm worried about," Kat confided. "It
worries me that you can see *past* the underwear if you want
to."

CJ's laugh softened into a gentle smile, a smile that would have
stunned his mother in its resemblance to his father. "You are my
best friend. I would never embarrass you like that. It would be
like sneaking into your bedroom or something, and I know that's
just wrong. My parents taught me better than that."

Kat smiled a little in return. She was both relived and a little
disappointed that CJ was such a sweet friend. As they had gotten
older, she knew that her friends thought CJ was really cute, and
she had begun to hope that, some day, they could be boyfriend and
girlfriend, but she wasn't ready for the concept of loving an
alien.

***

Chapter 4

Kat was just finishing up her shift at the convenience mart when
she heard an unfamiliar voice. When she looked up, she saw a
handsome boy -- really cute -- with huge blue eyes and a killer
smile.

"Hi, I'm Andy. I'm new here. My mom wanted me to pick up some
batteries, and I don't see any." He flashed the killer smile
once more, and Kat just stared.

After a moment of standing there, very much like an idiot, Kat
finally processed beyond the boy's looks, and his words began to
register. Andy failed to notice her glazed expression, or perhaps
was too polite to mention it, but he waited patiently until she
found her voice.

"Batteries... ummm... well, what size do you need? We keep them
behind the counter so no one will walk off with them. Not that
you would do that, but that's just what we do." Kat attempted
to cover her nervousness with babble, much as Lois would do, but
she was unaware of how poorly it served that purpose.

"Double A," Andy replied. He watched the girl nervously twirl
her hair and fidget. She was kind of pretty. She had wavy brown
hair that reached her shoulders and it had a pretty red shine to
it. Her eyes were an unusual green, and they were really wide.
She wasn't fat, but she wasn't really skinny either. She looked
like she was in shape; maybe she was a runner or something. In
any case, she seemed sweet, and she wasn't bad to look at. "Do
you have a boyfriend?"

Kat stopped in the act of reaching for the batteries located
beneath the counter. She thought briefly of CJ, but he wasn't
really a boyfriend. He was her friend, and he was a boy, but that
was about it. She wondered if he thought of her as a girlfriend,
and decided that he didn't. He had certainly never said anything
like that, and she didn't expect him to.

"No boyfriend," she told him. "Why?"

"I just wondered if you might want to go out. I don't know many
things to do around here, but maybe we could catch a movie or
something." He looked at her hopefully. She really was pretty,
and he would like to get to know her.

After a moment of thought, Kat decided that she had little to
lose. He was nice-looking, after all, and her dad had said that
she should spend time with people other than CJ. "I'll have to
ask my dad," she told him. "But, I would like to go out."

Andy flashed the killer smile once more. He gave her his
telephone number, and paid for the batteries before leaving the
store. As soon as he had left, Kat called her father at work.
While he was a little annoyed at being interrupted at work, he
was pleased that Kat was showing interest in another boy. He felt
that she was much too young to be getting serious about one boy,
and while she insisted that her relationship with CJ was purely
friendship, he had his doubts. He had little trust for teenage
boys, vividly remembering being one himself, and he was worried
for his daughter. It had been hard raising her alone, and if it
had not been for the Kents he might not have managed it, but that
didn't mean that he was ready to hand his daughter over to their
son.

Kat was thrilled that her dad had given her permission to go out,
and she couldn't wait to call Andy. She waited on a few more
customers, and then decided that it had been long enough for him
to make it home. She dialed the number that he had given her, and
was surprised when he answered the phone. She told him of her
father's decision, and agreed to meet him at the small theater
in town. She reminded herself that she didn't know him, so she
didn't give him her home address.

It made her feel just a little guilty when she called CJ to tell
him that she would not be over to watch videotapes that night,
but she rationalized that he wasn't really a boyfriend, so she
shouldn't feel too bad. Oddly, he didn't ask her why she had to
change her plans, he just agreed and told her that he hoped they
might be able to do it soon.

Kat spent hours getting ready for the "date". It was the first
time that she had gone out with a boy when she wasn't part of a
group, so it was special. Her father said it was fine to give
Andy their address, as long as she didn't leave before he got
home from work.

When Andy arrived at her house to pick her up, she introduced him
to her father. They seemed to get along well enough, and the
meeting was short. Once that formality was taken care of, they
left the house in Andy's car. It wasn't as nice as CJ's truck,
and didn't look as well kept up. Nevertheless, it drove well,
and Kat soon found herself entering downtown Claremont and
heading toward the Ciniplex there. The little theatre specialized
in older movies, classics really, and it was less expensive than
one of the larger ones that showed the newest releases.

The movie was really good. Kat enjoyed the thriller about the
doomed ocean vessel, and, regardless of knowing what the ending
must be, and the fact that she had watched it a dozen times with
CJ, she still cried when so many people died. Andy was fascinated
with the special effects used in the movie and was still talking
about them with animation as they left the theater. Kat had liked
being able to watch a movie with a friend, and if she was a
little disappointed because the other girls in the audience had
their boyfriend's arm around them, she didn't think about it
too much.

The return trip to her house was slightly more eventful. Just a
few miles outside of the city, just before reaching the little
suburb where she lived, Andy's car gave out. They pulled over at
the side of the road, and decided that they would walk together
to the nearest house. Andy didn't want to leave Kat alone in the
car, so he took her with him.

After several hundred yards, Kat twisted her ankle and fell on
the side of the road. The joke had always been that the potholes
here were big enough to eat a car, and while that might be an
exaggeration, they truly were big enough to give a girl wearing
high heels a bit of trouble.

Kat screamed when she fell, and she really did try not to cry,
but the pain was more than she could handle. She sobbed quietly
as Andy tried to comfort her, and tried to figure out what to do.
He couldn't leave her there, it was just as unsafe as leaving
her in the car would have been. He also couldn't get her into
town when she was crying so hard. He put his arms around her as
she cried, and he considered his options. The decision was taken
from him, though, as a very angry CJ pulled up in his truck, and
stopped with a squeal of tires.

CJ had heard Kat's scream. He didn't know how he had heard it
and known instantly that it was her, but he had. He had
recognized her gasp of pain instantly, and her sobs had torn at
his heart. He had barely remembered to get in his truck, rather
than just running out of the house at top speed. He had managed
to get in the truck and race to her rescue, without revealing his
powers to the neighborhood.

When the truck skidded to a stop, CJ leapt out quickly. What he
saw was Kat sitting on the ground with Andy crouched over her.
Kat was crying, and that was all CJ needed to know. As quickly as
he could, he tackled Andy over Kat's head. He took the larger
boy to the ground, and was proceeding to knock the stuffing out
of him when a deep voice called his name from behind him. CJ
didn't hear the voice, but he did feel the hands of Superman as
the hero picked the teenager up and relocated him a safe distance
away from Andy.

Kat was still trying to figure out exactly what had happened. One
minute, she had been hurting, but otherwise safe with Andy, and
the next she was watching her best friend knock him senseless.
Finally, she realized that CJ must have realized that she was in
trouble and just mistaken what that trouble was. She attempted to
go to Andy's aid, but Superman's large hand held her back.

"Would you care to explain what is going on here, young man?"
Clark said in his sternest voice. In truth, the sternness wasn't
only for effect; he was furious that CJ had driven so
recklessly.

"He hurt Kat!" CJ sputtered.

Both Kat and Andy looked at CJ with shocked expressions, and
quickly denied that this was the case.

It took several minutes of explaining to clear up the situation,
and apologies took several minutes more. CJ was caught between
what remained of his anger -- something he didn't understand --
and embarrassment over what he had done. Clark, too, was angry,
but this was more due to his fear for his son's behavior than
what might have happened between Andy and Kat.

When the discussion finally ended, Clark flew Kat to the nearest
emergency room to have her ankle x-rayed, and CJ drove Andy to
the Claremont garage to arrange to have the car towed. The boys
did talk some on the way to the garage. CJ apologized sheepishly
once more, and Andy accepted the apology while rubbing the jaw
that would soon bruise. When the reached the garage, Andy spoke
before getting out of the truck. "Are you sure she's not your
girlfriend?" he asked.

CJ looked up in surprise. "Nah," he told him, "but she *is* my
best friend, and I'd do anything for her." The look he gave
Andy was still slightly threatening, and Andy took the hint. He
nodded briefly before exiting the vehicle.

CJ drove home slowly and carefully, and was quite relieved to see
that his father wasn't yet home. He slipped up the stairs and
entered his bedroom quietly. He turned off his television, which
was now showing a different program than what he had been
watching when Kat had screamed, and changed into some shorts to
sleep in.

His last thought before drifting off to sleep was that Andy had
been lucky that Superman had shown up. He didn't really know how
much damage he could have done if he hadn't been stopped, and
Andy hadn't really had a chance. CJ was sure that his father
would have a good deal to say about what had happened. He had
used his strength carelessly, and someone could have been hurt.
What's more, he could have been revealed as an alien, and that
would have put the entire family in danger. CJ figured he was
looking at least a month of grounding, but he decided it was
worth it. After all, Kat had needed help. Maybe not the kind he
had given, but the situation had worked out for the best. Now, if
only he could convince his father of that.

***

Superman flew fairly quickly with his precious cargo. It wasn't
that he didn't want to spend time with the girl -- in fact, the
opposite was true, but he could tell from her accelerated
heartbeat that she was either in a great deal of pain or that she
was very nervous about the flight.

Within moments, he arrived at Metropolis General Hospital. He had
considered taking her to the small clinic in Claremont, but he
wasn't really sure that it was still open. While he didn't see
a break in her ankle, he wanted her to have the best care, and
this was the place to go.

After letting the receptionist know that she was injured, he
seated her in the waiting area for the emergency room. He knew
that they would not see her without parental concent, so he
quietly told her that he would be right back, and made his way to
the nearest empty restroom. He was grateful that it was late
enough that the area was relatively deserted. He checked to
ensure that nobody was watching him enter, and then closed
himself into a small stall. With a quick spin, he changed into
the jeans and t-shirt that he had been wearing when CJ had made
his mad dash from the house. A loose flannel shirt covered the
sleeves of his suit. Once more scanning the immediate area to
ensure that nobody was around, he exited the small bathroom,
adjusting his glasses as he went.

When he arrived back in the waiting area, he found Kat looking
both alone and quite nervous. He introduced himself to the
receptionist at the front desk, and explained that Superman had
located him and sent him ahead because he possessed a power of
attorney for Kat. The receptionist confirmed this through Kat's
records, then asked Clark to have a seat.

As Clark approached Kat, she still didn't meet his eyes. She had
been avoiding him since CJ's revelation had come out, and this
appeared to be more of the same. With a sigh, he sat down next to
the teenage girl. The waiting area was unusually quiet, and they
were quite alone, so he decided that this would be as good a time
as any to get things out in the open.

"How's the ankle?" he began.

Kat shifted herself uncomfortably. "It hurts," she replied.

"Kat, I really think we need to talk."

Kat once more avoided Clark's eyes. "About what?"

"Well, for starters, we can discuss why you won't look at me,"
he said in exasperation.

Kat finally looked up, her green eyes filled with fear and
embarrassment. "I guess I just don't know what to say."

Clark was surprised at the fear he saw in her eyes. Kat had never
been afraid of him, not even when he had disciplined her in her
father's absence years before. Carefully, he approached what he
thought was the matter. "I'm still the same person I was
before, you know. I'm still CJ's dad, and I'm still your
friend. That hasn't changed."

Kat lowered her eyes once more. It was easier to deal with this
when she wasn't looking at him. "I know," she replied
cautiously. "But, you aren't just Mr. Kent any more."

Clark sighed. "Yes, I am."

Kat looked up, and saw that he was just as uncomfortable as she
was. In a small way, that made her feel a little better.
"Look," he told her, "I know that things seem a little
different now, but I really *am* the same person. The other part
of me is just something I do to help out when I can."

Kat met his brown eyes, eyes that really reminded her of CJ, and
realized that it was true. He was still CJ's dad, still the dad
she had always wanted. As she looked at him, she decided that if
she was going to be embarrassed, he might as well hear it all.
"I guess every girl I know has a crush on Superman," she
explained. "It's kind of weird, knowing that he's really your
best friend's dad."

Clark smiled. "Well, I'm just a regular guy that can do some
unusual things," he told her. "Like I can tell you that your
ankle isn't broken, or that you don't do as well in math as you
could."

Kat smiled again at the reminder of the hours he had spent
tutoring her in math. That had been one of the reasons that she
had always liked him so well: Mr. Kent had the ability to see
whether you didn't understand something, or if you just weren't
trying. He had been the one to confront a math teacher who was
letting her slide through a class without learning, when even her
own father hadn't thought she was capable of the work. He had
always been on her side, and she suspected that he might still
be, despite his extra identity.

"I was pretty mad when CJ didn't tell me," she added.

"Well, that was mostly my fault," he explained. "It's a
secret that we *have* to keep. Anyone who knows is in danger.
There are a lot of people that would like to get to Superman. All
the criminals that he sent to prison -- even some scientists --
would like to find out who he really is. If that were to happen,
his family would be in a lot of danger." Clark tried not to
frighten the girl, but he needed to ensure that she understood
the seriousness of the situation.

"I understand, Mr. Kent. If anyone found out that I knew, I
could be a target to get to him, too. I won't tell anyone," she
assured him. "I would never hurt you guys. You're my family,
even more than my real family is." She looked up into Clark's
eyes once more. "I guess I kind of forgot that for a while,"
she said sheepishly.

Clark smiled. He had always thought of this girl as though she
were his own, and he was glad to have her able to look at him
once more. Also, her heart rate had dropped back to near normal,
so he was less concerned about the amount of pain she must be
in.

"Kathryn?" a nurse called, stepping from behind closed double
doors and into the waiting area.

"Here," Kat called, trying to stand.

Clark saw her difficulty, and quickly scooped the girl into his
arms. He carried her behind the nurse, following the white-clad
woman into a small exam room. As he sat Kat down on the exam
table, he looked down to see eyes that were at once trusting and
open. It was good to have her back again. He was sure that this
discussion wasn't completely over, but they had made a
beginning.

He told Kat that he would be back, then he went back out to the
receptionist's desk to call her father. They would be able to
see her with Clark's consent, due to the medical power of
attorney that was kept in her records for emergencies, but the
insurance paperwork would have to be signed by her father. Once
he had let the other man know what was happening, he went back to
the little exam room to sit with Kat. Surprisingly, despite the
empty waiting room, the emergency room was really quite busy, and
it was going to be a long night. He settled in to wait with her
until her father arrived.

***

Chapter 5

When CJ awoke the next morning, he got the reaction he expected.
While his father had not pressed the issue with a tired and
frustrated child, Clark knew that he had to address the issues
presented by CJ's increasing strength. CJ opened his eyes and
stretched, and turned over groggily in bed. His eyes met that of
his father, who was perched on the edge of his night stand,
watching the boy sleep.

He smiled at CJ as their eyes met, and the smile was returned.
"Is this where I get the lecture on controlling my abilities?"
CJ asked.

"You've had that." Clark couldn't help but smile once more at
the boy. He was still a child, just as Clark had been when he had
been developing his unusual gifts. Jonathan and Martha had been
far more understanding than anyone would normally have been, and
he intended to pass along the benefits of accepting parents. He
had an advantage that his parents had not possessed, and that was
the first-hand knowledge of how to control the abilities, and
when controlling them was appropriate. Clark had been alone when
he was most vulnerable, and he didn't want CJ to feel the same
way.

"I think it's time for some basic training," Clark told his
rapidly-waking child. "You have some things that need to be
controlled before you hurt someone." He remembered giving a
similar lecture to his wife years before, and was grateful that
this time around, he would have the advantage of being able to
demonstrate, rather than just observe and coach. "Get some
shorts on, and we'll get started."

"What about Mom?" CJ asked. His mother had been slightly
withdrawn lately, and he wasn't sure if she should be invited to
the lessons or not.

"I told your mom what we were going to do. She thinks it's a
good idea," Clark replied. In fact, he and Lois had discussed
the pros and cons of this at length and on several occasions in
the last few months. Last night's activities had just moved up
the time line on what they had already planned to do.

CJ nodded, and stood to dress as his father left the room. He
pulled on a sweatshirt without sleeves, similar to the ones his
father frequently wore, and a matching pair of running shorts. He
tugged on socks, and then his running shoes, before entering his
bathroom to brush his teeth.

Once he was ready, he walked downstairs and met his father in the
kitchen. Clark handed him a bagel and juice box, and then walked
to the back door. CJ took the hint. While his father was not
obviously angry, neither was he thrilled with the situation. CJ
had nearly hurt someone -- and, more than that, he had nearly
revealed the family secret. CJ didn't know why his father
hadn't done this long ago.

CJ followed his father out the back, and walked with him out into
the trees in the yard. "We chose this land for the house because
it backed up against these trees," Clark was telling him. "They
provide a natural cover for landings, although I do have to make
sure I take off fast so that no one catches me above the
treeline. They should also make a great hiding place for this."
Clark moved slightly beyond the nearest line of trees, to a small
clearing.

The entire area was rather small. They owned only about an acre
of land, and it extended straight back into the wooded area
behind the house. From the street, only the houses and a few
trees were visible, but the area did extend for a short distance.
There were lines of trees, and it provided a good deal of cover
for take-offs and landings, but there was little area that could
be considered a clearing. Clark stopped within this small area,
and arranged some bottles he had carried out earlier into an
uneven line on the ground.

"Let's start with vision," he told CJ. "You seem to be most
adept at that, and it's relatively safe." CJ complied by taking
a stance as far from the bottles as possible within the clearing.
He concentrated firmly, and soon the first bottle exploded with a
flash of glass. Fortunately, both were invulnerable to the shards
that flew in their direction, and Clark couldn't help but laugh.
"Okay, so I lied -- *nothing* is relatively safe!"

CJ gave him a sheepish grin, and a short apology. Clark took the
event in his stride, and proceeded to begin demonstrations on how
to control the beam of heat. For several hours, they worked
without pause, each so caught up in the new feeling of
camaraderie that was resulting that they were unaware of the
time. Clark taught CJ all the finer points that he had spent
years discovering. He aided him in the techniques of
concentration that he had perfected over decades of use. He
taught him all that he knew, and learned a few new things that CJ
had discovered during his time of experimentation in Smallville.

They worked through lunch, and by the time that Clark was
convinced that they could improve no more, it was nearly dinner
time. Fearing that Lois would attempt to cook them dinner, a
torture that neither was willing to deal with, they finally
agreed to wait until the next day to tackle additional
abilities.

As predicted, they met Lois just as she was sticking her head
into the refrigerator and hoping for inspiration. Clark sneaked
up behind her, and encircled her waist with his hands. When she
shrieked and turned around quickly to punch her husband, he met
her with an energetic kiss that quickly accelerated into much
more. CJ was used to such displays from his parents. As a child,
he had assumed that all parents had their hands all over one
another all the time, and it had surprised him when Kat had
mentioned it. Lately, though, CJ found that watching his parents
together made him slightly uncomfortable, and he quickly left the
room. He would have to mention it to them later, he thought.

Lois and Clark finally remembered just where they were, and
managed to bring themselves back from the direction they had been
headed. With an acknowledging smile, Lois was first to break the
silence that had followed their mutual groping session. "Wow.
That was nice!"

"Liked that, did you?" he smiled. He ran his hands once again
up her sides and around to caress her back.

"Yeah, I liked it." Lois returned his smile. "What are you
fixing me for dinner?"

Clark sighed, briefly remembering a time when they would have
ignored that appetite and satisfied a different one without a
second thought. It had been a short period in their lives,
interrupted more quickly than even if Lois had gone through a
pregnancy. Having a child in the house limited the spontaneous
sex, but it had little effect on other demonstrations of
affection. They were a demonstrative couple, and always had been.
Touching for them was as natural as breathing.

Clark pulled Lois close and looked over her shoulder at the
contents of the refrigerator. He didn't see much, which let him
know that they had once again neglected the grocery shopping. He
did, however, see a full carton of eggs, and he knew that there
was a pound of bacon in the freezer. He reached around Lois for
the eggs and then, with a final kiss, separated himself from her
to begin making a large country "breakfast" for dinner.

Lois watched him work, impressed as always by his economy of
movement and natural grace. He was a joy to watch. He looked as
good to her now as he had when she had first fallen in love with
him, and the feeling had been reinforced by years of
companionship and sharing. She knew she couldn't live without
him. At one point, she had been concerned that her aging would be
obvious next to his lack of change, but there were differences in
his appearance as well as hers.

Lois had allowed her hair to grow back to one length and, while
it was longer then it had been when they met, it was in much the
same style. She had cut it several times over the years, but she
always came back to this versatile and simple style. There was a
sprinkling of gray strands among the brown, but nothing too
noticeable, and good skin care had kept wrinkles to a minimum.
She had gained a few pounds through the years as well, a
testament to Clark's regular cooking, but not enough to change
her dress size or her energy level. On the whole, she felt that
she was much the same as she had been when she married, at least
in appearance. Emotionally, she was very different. She was open
and confident in a way that came from being unconditionally loved
for the first time in her life. She was relaxed, even as she
persisted in her attempt to be her best professionally.
Personally, she was already there.

Close observation revealed subtle changes in Clark's appearance
as well. While his hair held no gray, there were a number of new
lines on his face that had come from both normal worry as a
parent and the enormous weight of being responsible for a planet.
He was able to keep the stress to a manageable level with Lois's
help, but it had added a certain cynicism to him that had not
been present years before. He consistently saw the worst that the
world had to offer, and it had made an impact. Lois and CJ
reminded him of why he bothered, why the world must be a better
place for them to live in. They kept him going.

Clark thawed the bacon and started it frying. Next, he quickly
mixed up a batch of pancake batter (his mother's recipe) and
heated the griddle by glaring at it before placing it over a
burner to keep it hot. His efforts were then divided between
frying the eggs and flipping the pancakes. As the eggs became
solid, he managed to flip them perfectly, even as he was reaching
back into the refrigerator for a carton of orange juice.
Normally, breakfast foods were Lois's forte, and he was
surprised that she didn't offer to help.

Glancing over at his wife, he found her still standing next to
the refrigerator, propped there to watch him cook. He looked
himself over carefully, and after determining that he had not
spilled anything on himself to earn her constant stare, he waved
his hand before her face and gained her attention. "Earth to
Lois," he announced.

She smiled up at him, still lost in her thoughts. Gradually, she
roused herself enough to realize that the look he was giving her
bordered between quizzical and exasperated. "Sorry," she
mumbled. "Just enjoying the scenery."

He smiled back at her and kissed her lightly on the forehead.
Then, he handed her a small stack of plates with the silverware
sitting atop them and told her to "make herself useful for
something besides ogling the cook." Lois did so, slightly
embarrassed at being so obviously caught. She wasn't too upset,
though. How many woman could honestly still be stunned by the
attractiveness of their husband after fifteen years of marriage?
She was lucky, and she knew it. As soon as she had set the table,
she jogged up the stairs to tell CJ that it was time for dinner.
She was already at his door when she remembered that he most
likely would have heard her if she had stayed in the dining room.
Shaking her head, she knocked and let him know that food was
waiting. She jogged back down the stairs, eager to ogle her
husband for a while longer.

***

Clark had taken a week of vacation from the Planet. Throughout
that time, he instructed CJ carefully on the use, and abuse, of
his powers. They spent time controlling breathing, testing
strength, working with large and small objects to ensure that CJ
would be less likely to misjudge his strength, and conducting
speed drill and races. Teaching CJ what he could do was easy, it
was teaching him what *not* to do that Clark was having trouble
with. Fortunately, CJ was not a child who placed a lot of weight
on his athletic abilities or popularity. This type of stress
might have made the issue of secrecy moot. Instead, CJ valued his
intelligence and his writing talent, and these were not really
affected by the developing physical abilities.

Clark found that he shared more with his son than strength. They
both used writing as a way to achieve a feeling of accomplishment
as they competed on equal footing with their peers. They both had
feelings of not fitting in that went beyond what they could do,
and had begun early in childhood. Clark was slightly concerned,
if not surprised, to find that CJ relied on Kat for his
equilibrium in much the same way that Clark had relied on Lois.
It wasn't that he didn't like Kat, but the emotions of a
teenager were unpredictable, and to place one's trust in that
was a precarious thing. Nevertheless, Clark understood CJ's need
for a confidant, and was not really angry that he had shared the
truth with her.

They developed a special bond that week that went beyond father
and son, and entered into a special friendship -- or even a
brotherhood. They were alone against the world in many ways, and
they were able to share hopes, fears and experiences that no one
else could possibly understand. They shared so much, and enjoyed
joking about the mistakes they had made. They became friends.

It amazed Clark that his son had become so much like a man. They
were able to talk as equals, and this was something that took
Clark off guard. He was prepared to instruct, and to deal with
his child's needs, but being able to receive comfort and
encouragement from his son was a surprise.

"Don't feel bad, Dad," CJ had told him after Clark revealed a
particularly embarrassing incident that had occurred after he had
taken Rachel to the prom and then had to explain that he only
wanted to be friends. "At least you had a date for the dance. I
wouldn't have the slightest idea who to ask."

"What about Kat?" Clark asked, hoping to get a little more
insight into his son's relationship with the pretty girl.

"What about her?"

"Why not ask her to the dance?"

The look on CJ's face clearly told Clark that he had said the
wrong thing. "You've got to be kidding! She's my best
friend."

Clark looked at his son for a moment before he answered, "Rachel
was a friend, too."

CJ sighed, and sat down Indian style on the ground. His feelings
for Kat were complicated, as he had realized in the last few
weeks. He wasn't sure he could put them into words. "I don't
know where to start. She's more than just a friend, she's my
best friend. You don't think of your friend like that, you just
don't."

Clark sat down next to his son, and continued, "Think of her,
how?"

"Like a girl. Like a girlfriend, I guess." He shook his head in
frustration, his own feelings muddled and confused, and certain
that his father must be even more lost. "Sometimes it's just
like it always was, and she's just Kat. But, sometimes, when
I'm not thinking about it, I see her and it's different. She's
not just a friend any more, and I wonder if she feels different,
too. I'm afraid that if she finds out, she won't be my friend,
that it would make her uncomfortable, and I don't want to lose
her."

Clark felt a wave of empathy for his son. "I remember the first
time I asked your mom out," he began. "I was so in love with
her, and I was so sure that she didn't feel the same way."
Clark chuckled softly to himself, "I suppose she would have
preferred for me to ask for money, but I finally did it." Clark
stopped when he saw the confused look on CJ's face. "She got to
babbling when I told her than I needed to ask her something, and
it kind of went from there."

CJ nodded in understanding. His mother was notorious for
babbling. Most of the time, it made sense when it was sorted out,
but the thoughts that made their way randomly into speech
frequently caused more confusion that she ever realized. She
still did it when she was nervous or embarrassed, and CJ thought
it was cute. It was weird to think of your mom as a girl, but
when she was babbling, he could sure see that side of her. "But
she went out with you. She must have felt like you did."

"Not exactly, not at first," Clark explained. "She was afraid
if we started dating and it didn't work out, that we couldn't
work together any more. It took a while for her to have enough
faith in our friendship to believe it would survive a
break-up."

"How long?" CJ asked with feeling.

"*Too* long," his father replied. "We went back and forth for
months, but we always wound up together. We couldn't manage to
stay apart, even when we were mad. It was like a part of each of
us belonged to the other, and we had no choice but to make it
work." Clark wished he had always been so philosophical about
his wife, but it had been a long time coming. They had put one
another through a lot before they had come together, and it was a
time in his life he would have preferred not to dwell on. He
would go through this for his son, he would do anything to spare
him some of the pain and uncertainty that he had experienced.

"How did you know that you were supposed to be more than
friends?"

Clark took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. "It was more
than a feeling, I was just certain. Your mom was... well... she
had been in some really bad relationships, and she was afraid
that ours wouldn't work out either."

"Were you ever afraid that if you wanted more, you could lose
what you already had?" CJ voiced his greatest fear.

"Every day," Clark said with a sigh. "I think we would have
been together a lot sooner if we hadn't been so afraid to lose
what we had. Our friendship was very special; we could tell each
other most anything, and we knew we'd have the other person on
our side. That's a valuable thing, and it's not something you
want to mess with. On the other hand, having someone to really
love is amazing. It's worth taking a risk, even a big one. I
guess you just have to decide that if a friendship really is so
valuable, it probably can stand a little risk."

CJ considered the information for a moment, comparing this with
his knowledge of Kat. Were they strong enough to stand a risk? If
they weren't, was the friendship really so special after all?
Aside from his heritage, they really hadn't faced many
challenges to the friendship, so he had little to base his
opinion on. With a sigh, he allowed himself to acknowledge that
the decision would not have to be made today, and he could
address it later. Unfortunately, that wouldn't keep him from
worrying about it in the meantime.

***

"What does it feel like to fly?"

Clark turned to look at his son, and was stunned to see the
longing in his eyes. He had deliberately never taken CJ flying as
a child because he didn't want him connected to Superman. They
had allowed him to attend functions where the super-hero was
present, but that had been the extent of the contact. When CJ had
asked about their friendship with the alien, both Lois and Clark
had minimized their involvement and hidden behind the disclaimers
that all reporters encountered him at one time or another, and it
wasn't so special after all. CJ had accepted the explanations,
especially since his friends had no contact with him either, and
little had been said about it.

Since finding out about his heritage, CJ was no longer content to
allow himself to have the same limitations as others where his
father was concerned. He intended to learn all there was to know.
He was well aware that his mother had gone flying on numerous
occasions, as she had written about it frequently during her
earliest Superman articles.

"It feels... There's nothing like it, CJ." Clark answered as
simply as he could. "Do you really want to know?"

CJ looked at his father, hope in his eyes. "Yeah," he answered.
"I want to go."

Clark stood and stepped a few paces away from his son. They had
been reclining in the sunshine after a picnic lunch, and he was
certain that they were very much alone. He spun quickly, coming
to a stop wearing the familiar blue and red suit, and looked down
at his son. CJ had watched the transformation with awe, as
surprised by it now as he had been the first time. While he could
be fast, rarely were his actions a blur. He simply wasn't
confident enough with his skills to take them at such speed.

When Clark reached out his hand to his son, CJ stood and linked
arms with his father. "This will be quick, at first. I don't
want the neighbors to see the take-off." With that, Clark
tightened his grip on CJ. Reminding him once more to keep his arm
straight, the two of them rose quickly into the air.

If Clark was a blur when he spun into the suit, that was what CJ
felt like as he was propelled into the sky. He tensed
momentarily, then reminded himself that this was his father and
that he was always safe with him. He finally allowed himself to
relax as Clark slowed his ascent and began to take CJ on a high
tour of Claremont. CJ was amazed at how natural it felt to be in
the air. It was like a memory, only he hadn't done it before. He
felt as if he *belonged*, in a way that was new and amazing to
him.

After nearly an hour of flying over the local area, Clark flew CJ
to Metropolis. It was a short flight, only a couple of minutes,
but the change in scenery was enormous. They flew through the
buildings, admiring the architecture of the skyscrapers, and
finally came to a stop on the roof of the Daily Planet building.
CJ was speechless for a moment as he looked at the expanse of
city below them.

"This is amazing," he told his father. "Thanks. I'll never
forget this."

Impulsively, Clark reached over to hug his son. He truly hoped
that CJ would share this ability with him as well. It was amazing
to be able to go wherever you wanted whenever it suited you, and
it was something he wanted to share.

Reluctantly, Clark decided that he had to end their outing. He
locked arms with CJ once more, and they took to the air. Within
moments, they had arrived back at their home. CJ's head was
still spinning as he regained his balance after landing, and he
gave his father a bit of a dirty look.

Clark smiled, apologizing mildly for the speed of the landing,
and explaining once more the significance of landing too quickly
to attract attention in the neighborhood. CJ nodded that he
understood, but still wobbled slightly as he headed for the
house.

***

Chapter 6

"Mother, you are going *where*?" Lois nearly dropped the
telephone as she plopped herself down onto the sofa. Her mother
had come up with some crazy schemes, but this was ridiculous! She
sounded so calm, and yet her words made no sense.

"Honey, we are going to Bichallsci. It's a very small area,
somewhere in some tiny Third World country; I really don't even
know what one. Your father will be working with the natives to
establish a medical training program."

Lois rolled her eyes. This was just one more item to add to an
already bad day. "How long will you be gone?" she asked in a
voice that did its best to be practical.

"Probably around three years."

For a moment, Lois couldn't speak. She had been so pleased when
her parents had remarried, and their togetherness had filled a
hole in her that she had never thought would be filled. In
addition, her father's retirement from one of a thousand unusual
projects had led him into the field of training others. He had
found that he loved to teach, and the money from his past
projects had allowed both he and her mother to travel and explore
their relationship.

Perhaps Lois would have been more pleased if she had seen them
more often, but it had been just as well that their interests had
led them around the world instead of into the tiny community of
Claremont. Clark tolerated her parents, and would always be
grateful for Sam's assistance when he had been so ill many years
before, but he had little tolerance for her mother.

Ellen had always been the typical mother-in-law. She found fault,
complained, nagged, and generally criticized both Clark and Lois
until they were just as happy to know that the next visit would
be six months or a year away. Clark was always polite, and even
CJ tolerated the visits with as much good humor as possible, but
having the Lanes around was never easy.

"Mother! *Three years?*" While Lois didn't really spend a
great deal of time either talking with or visiting her mother,
the prospect of spending three years away from her still came as
a shock. "What on earth will you do there for three years?"

With a long suffering sigh that her daughter could be so
difficult, Ellen Lane continued her explanation. "Lois, it takes
time to establish medicine as a legitimate way to heal. These
people are used to religion and magic as their only weapons. Your
father has found men willing to learn basic medical care, but it
will take time to teach them the finer points of medication usage
and wound care. The country is at war, you know."

Lois returned her mother's sigh. "I realize that. That's why I
have no idea why you're going."

"I am not letting your father fall into the hands of some native
princess! It took me years to get him back, and even longer for
him to make up the years he had wasted. I'm going with him!"

Lois briefly wondered why it had bothered her that her mother was
leaving the country. She could be so difficult on the subject of
her past hurts. "Fine, Mother," she said with a sigh. "You go
to the Middle East, and I'll talk to you soon. Do you have a
cell-phone number yet?"

"Well, that's part of the reason that I'm calling. Your father
doesn't want to carry electronics with us that the tribesman
won't be comfortable with. It appears we will be without
communication for a while."

Lois considered arguing, she really did. Finally, she decided
that there was no point If she needed them, she could always send
Superman to fetch them, and deal with the yelling then rather
than now. "Fine, Mother. I'll see you in a few years." As
usual, her mother missed the sarcasm.

They chatted a few more minutes about inconsequential things,
then Lois made an excuse to get off the line. In truth, three
years without her mother's phone calls could really be a good
thing. After all, her mother was nearly eighty; if she wanted to
go traipsing off into another country to find some lost destiny,
she was certainly old enough to make that decision herself. Lois
would miss her -- and her father, too, for that matter -- but it
wouldn't directly impact her daily life. For now, her daily life
was about all that she could handle. It did concern her that she
had not been given an opportunity to say goodbye to her father,
but it was not unusual that he would leave Ellen to handle family
matters while he tended to business.

Lois glared back at the computer screen that was giving her so
much difficulty. They had a new writer on staff and, while he
showed potential, he was a long way from being perfect. Editing
his copy required more effort than she wanted to give at the
moment, so she searched through files until she found another
story that was nearly the same size, and much easier to proof, to
insert in the blank area.

There were days, and this was one of them, that she wished Clark
had taken the job of Editor. He was better at it, that was
certain. They had discussed the matter at length when both of
them had been up for promotion, and had decided that she was the
one who should accept. Clark had been dealing with several minor
disasters as Superman at the time, and he had realized that he
just didn't have the time to give to the position. Also, Lois
did have both seniority with the paper and experience in the
editorial role.

She loved the job, but she had changed it markedly since she took
it over. Now, she took care of the final decisions, but Pat and
Andrew took care of the rest. She had decided to create the two
Assistant Editor positions when she realized that her job would
be impossible with the thirty-mile commute that she had to deal
with. Quite simply, she never made it home before she was paged
back to work. Her decision became whether to make changes in the
job description, or to move back to Metropolis. She had loved her
home too much to give it up. While she had been the one opposed
to the move so many years before, she was the one who now refused
to leave it.

Their little home in the suburbs allowed Clark some peace. While
Superman was still active in world affairs, he concentrated less
of his attention directly on Metropolis, and gave more time to
their family. He had been concerned that he would be connected
with Superman in the city, and that CJ would be put in danger.
Lois had been tired of his leaving in the middle of each night,
off to save someone else while she dealt with the struggles of
raising a child alone.

With the press of a key, Lois LANned the final set-up for the
evening edition of the paper to her assistants, and changed the
screen to allow her to work on tomorrow's editorial. She felt
like she never really had time to write, and what she did write
was not as good as it had been when she was reporting. Still, her
editorial responsibilities included this, and she was always
living up to her responsibilities.

Lois heard CJ and Clark come in from their flight. Clark had
asked her opinion on several occasions of taking CJ up, up, and
away. Her motherly concern was always countered by the knowledge
that he would never be safer than when he was with his father.
She did worry that Clark would have to leave him long enough to
be Superman during their flight time, so she had put off the
decision as long as possible. Finally, she had told him that if
CJ asked, Clark could take him, but that she didn't want him to
bring up the subject.

They had discussed the matter more over the last few days of
"training", and she realized that CJ deserved to enjoy the
pleasure of flying with his father. She certainly missed the
privilege, but her grounding had more to do with the increasing
responsibilities of her job and the need to separate Lois and
Superman in the public's eye. Having CJ had changed Lois's
perception of what danger was. She was no longer content to hope
than they would be safe; it had to be a certainty.

"Honey, I'm home," Clark called as he came into the kitchen
through the back door. He still loved the domestic stuff, even
after all these years. He had sent CJ up to his room to get ready
for dinner, and now he needed to figure something out to cook.
After checking the refrigerator, he decided that they really
needed to make a better plan for getting the grocery shopping
done. The current idea was that whoever was near a store would
pick up a few things as necessary, but it clearly wasn't
working. It had been easy to do when CJ was little, but now they
just seemed too busy. Once again, Clark reached for the telephone
and called the local pizza parlor.

With pizza on the way, Clark went in search of his wife. He knew
she was here, and had a good idea of where she would be. He found
her, as expected, growling at the screen of the laptop computer
that had become her constant companion in years past. She had it
hooked up to a modem, and was clearly patched in to the Planet's
computer.

Clark walked up behind her and slipped his arms around her. She
growled softly, clearly exasperated with whatever she was working
on, and leaned her head back to kiss him. Clark gave her an
upside-down kiss, briefly nibbling on her lower lip before
releasing her and sneaking a peek at the screen.

"Well, you certainly have an opinion about that," he remarked
as he read over her editorial regarding the elimination of
creative writing courses in the Metropolis High Schools.

"I'm not sure which makes me angrier," she told him. "I'm
almost as angry at not being able to color this with profanity as
I am at the high schools' new policies."

Clark smiled and kissed the top of her head. She still had most
definite ideas regarding journalism in the public school system.
She had fought for years to ensure that Claremont didn't lose
its writing program and, as a result, CJ was now reaping the
benefits of a full journalism program. Now, she was trying to do
the same thing for Metropolis.

"Pizza's on the way," he told her as he pulled up a chair and
seated himself slightly behind her.

"You forgot to shop again?" she asked as she glared once more
at the screen.

"Yep," he answered with a smile, "So did you". She considered
being angry at the oversight, but instead she realized that he
was right. They really needed to find a better way to divide the
household chores.

As Clark watched his wife work, admiring the line of her neck
where she had pulled her hair up into a pony-tail, and finally
realized what was wrong with this picture. "Why are you working
on the laptop?"

Lois turned her head and glared at her husband briefly before
turning back to her story. "Because I haven't taken time to put
the dumb thing on disk, okay?"

Clark laughed quietly at his wife's continued refusal to keep
back-ups of the work she did. He would have to transfer the files
to disk while she ate her dinner. She was notorious for losing
files due to power surges and missed keystrokes, and he didn't
want to deal with her temper again when that happened. This was
one of the little things that he did for her: backing up her
work.

It wasn't that Clark needed to look for work. He was still
reporting for the Planet, although his stories had become less
investigative and more tame over the years. It was a natural
progression as his attention went more and more to his family and
less into his work. He had a novel going on the side, a
continuing project that allowed him to put the travels of his
youth to practical use, but this required little of his time. For
the most part, he assisted his wife in her duties at the Planet
and assisted the world as Superman. This, combined with being a
parent, was about all that any one man, even a superman, had time
for.

Within a few more minutes, Lois had completed her editorial and
run a spell-check on it. She corrected as many grammatical errors
as she could find, and passed the laptop to her husband. Lost in
thought, he didn't realize exactly what she wanted at first.
Finally, Clark shook himself slightly and focused on his wife.
With a sheepish grin, he sped through the article and made a few
corrections. He then saved it to the hard drive, and reached
around her for a floppy disk that sat on the desk. Lois smiled at
him before kissing him on the forehead and promising him a more
thorough thank-you for later.

Clark was just about to attempt to collect on that promise, or at
least to get a preview, when he heard a knock at the door. He
reached for his wallet as he approached the door.

"Hi, Mr. Kent," Kat said as the door before her swung open.

Clark looked puzzled, but just for a moment. "Hi, Kat. Since
when do you deliver pizza?"

"Just since I was standing in the pizza parlor when you
ordered," she said, returning his smile but not quite meeting
his eyes. "My dad didn't want to cook either, so we were
getting one. I thought maybe we could save the delivery boy a
trip. He looked really busy tonight."

Clark smiled once more as he took the pizzas from Kat. "How much
do we owe you?"

"I'm not sure," Kat said as she followed him through the door.
She was still limping slightly, but she no longer needed the
crutches. "I think it's written on the side of one of the
boxes."

Clark nodded, tipping the boxes to the side to read the amount.
He then removed several bills from his wallet, and handed them to
Kat. "Be sure you tell your dad 'thanks' for us."

"I will."

Clark opened the top box to see an extra large pizza with
everything, just like he had ordered. He couldn't help but
notice that Kat was watching him over his shoulder. "What did
you get?" he asked her.

Kat sighed. "Dad's on a vegetarian kick this week. I think he
got tomato and pineapple."

Clark looked up to see the look of disgust on Kat's face. He had
always thought of this girl as another of his children. Maybe it
was because she spent so much time in their house when she was
growing up, or maybe it was because she and CJ had become so
inseparable that the two just seemed to be one. If he had ever
had a girl, he imagined that she would be just like Kat. "You
know teenagers can't live without pepperoni," he told her. "I
think you'd better grab a plate and eat here. Do you need to
call your dad?" It didn't occur to him that she might refuse.

"Thanks, Mr. Kent. That would be really great," she told him as
she took the paper plates that he offered her and carried them to
the dining room table. She had spent so many dinners here that it
felt more natural to be here than it did to stay home and listen
to her father's complaints about his day at work. For the
moment, she even forgot that this man was really Superman, and
just enjoyed pretending that he was the father that she wished
she'd had. That used to make her feel guilty, but lately it just
made her feel relief.

***

Over dinner, Kat was reminded why she had always enjoyed being
with this family. They laughed, talked and defended one another
as they each detailed the events of their day. CJ was back to his
old self, and if she noticed that he and his father both reheated
their slices of pizza by staring at them, she didn't feel it was
her place to comment.

She was surprised to hear that the Lanes were leaving the
country, and she didn't miss the twin looks of relief that the
male Kents expressed when Lois made the announcement. She also
caught the brief glare that Lois bestowed upon them both, before
breaking into a fit of giggles herself.

After dinner, she helped Lois to pick up the dinner dishes and
throw them away. While they were breaking down the pizza box for
the recycle bin, Lois asked her about her new boyfriend. She was
surprised at the blush that rose up her face. "Well, he's not
my boyfriend," she told the older woman.

"I thought you were out on a date," Lois asked her, confused.

"We were," she confessed. She plopped down in a chair at the
kitchen table and told her, "I guess something happened."

"What happened?" Lois asked as she took a seat across the table
from Kat.

"Well, he kind of... well, he kissed me." Kat looked everywhere
except at Lois's face.

Lois sat and waited. Obviously, she wasn't getting the whole
story, and she didn't want to jump on the girl if there really
wasn't anything wrong. She had all the motherly thoughts of the
many fates that could befall a teenage girl, and she was at least
aware that her imagination could sometimes get the better of
her.

"It was just a little kiss," Kat went on. "It was at school,
and it was really quick, but it felt..." Kat trailed off.

"It felt how?" Lois asked with concern.

"It felt... wrong. I just felt like it was wrong, and I asked
him not to do it again. I said we could just be friends."

"And what did *he* say?" Lois could see the strain that this
was putting on the teenager.

"Not a word," Kat said. "He hasn't spoken to me since." Kat
looked as much exasperated as anything else. She didn't appear
to be angry, or even hurt. "It doesn't really bother me," she
said, confirming Lois's suspicions. "I liked him and all, but
there are people I like more. He was okay to be with, but just
okay. Does that make any sense?"

Lois smiled. "Of course it does. You're young, and you deserve
some time to look around before you decide who you want to be
with for the rest of your life."

"It isn't just that, Mrs. Kent. It just doesn't feel...
well... right, being with another boy. I mean, besides CJ." She
paused for a moment, considering whether or not she should be
having this discussion with the parent of the boy who was on her
mind, then decided that she had always been able to tell Mrs.
Kent anything, and this shouldn't be any different. After all,
she hadn't done anything wrong, and neither had CJ. "We've
just been friends for so long. Nothing feels wrong with him. He
can hug me, or hold my hand, and it doesn't bother me. With
other boys, when they touch me, I wonder what they really want.

"It's the same way with words. If CJ says something, I know he
means it. I don't worry that he's just trying to butter me up
or get me to do something. I just don't trust other people that
way."

Lois listened to the teenage girl explaining what she was
feeling. There was a part of her that was afraid that Kat might
be mistaking normal apprehension for something more, but a
greater part of her understood that trust was something that
couldn't be faked or maneuvered around. Just as she had trusted
Clark, despite all her experiences that said trust was never
well-placed, Kat had learned to trust CJ. It was a process that
had taken years, and that was not a feeling that she could easily
duplicate with another boy.

"Are you sure that you don't just need to get to know him
better?" she offered. "Like you said, you've known CJ for
years. It takes time to learn to trust someone that well. Maybe
you just need to give it some time."

"It isn't just that I feel comfortable with CJ -- it's that I
don't *want* to be that comfortable with anyone else. I would
rather just talk to CJ than go places and do stuff with someone
else." She closed her eyes and rested her head against the chair
back. "I feel different when I'm with him. I can say anything,
and I don't have to worry about what he will think about me or
what he might do. He already knows the worst things about me, and
he's my friend anyway. I don't have to pretend with him."

Lois watched Kat a while longer, absorbing the information. Kat
had just described the most important part of a lasting
relationship. She had also described the foundation for her
feelings towards her husband, both before they had become married
and after. The unconditional acceptance and unreserved trust were
essential for a friendship, and necessary for relationships to
survive the pitfalls of life. Unfortunately, Kat and CJ were
teenagers, not adults searching for lifetime mates. The situation
was sounding too serious for their ages, and that frightened
her.

"Kat, I know that you like being with CJ, but there is no way
for you to get to know other people if you spend all your time
with him." Lois didn't want to discourage the friendship -- it
meant too much to both of the kids -- but she wanted to slow down
any other ideas they might have.

"I know. It's just that I'd rather have a friend than a
boyfriend. Does that sound stupid?" Kat opened her eyes and
faced Lois again.

Lois stood, then walked around the table to Kat. She pulled the
girl into a hug, and continued holding her as she spoke. "I know
that CJ feels the same way. You are the most important friend
that he's ever had, and I don't know how he'd manage without
you. You will always be special to him."

"I guess. I just sometimes wonder if he feels like this too. And
sometimes, it's really weird. I feel all hot and cold, and
really messed up. I'm afraid if he knows that I feel like this,
he won't want to be around me." She held Lois tighter as she
continued, "I'm just so messed up inside."

Lois sighed and held Kat a little tighter. It was hard enough to
deal with friendships and relationship changes without dealing
with their added family difficulties. She wanted to help Kat, she
really did, but she didn't know how to start.

"I wish I had answers for you, honey. I'd do anything to make
you feel better about this. The truth is, I don't have the
answers. I will listen, though," she told Kat. "I'll always be
here to listen to you."

"Thanks, Mrs. Kent. You know, having you here almost makes up
for not having my mom."

Lois sighed once more. There had been a time she would have
protested being called Mrs. Kent. She had felt that her
professional reputation depended upon keeping the name, and she
had told Clark as much. Now, she was grateful to share her
husband's name. She hadn't realized that Lane and Kent were so
intertwined in the public eye that they naturally fell together.
It hadn't been until after the move to Claremont that she had
decided to take up the name of Kent. She had been tired of the
hassle of explaining her name each time she spoke to one of CJ's
teachers. Also, there was the matter of separating herself from
Superman. Lois Lane and Superman exclusives seemed to go
together. Lois Kent, on the other hand, was merely a married
reporter, mother of one, and not a particular target for anyone.
It had gone a long way towards changing her image, and that had
been the point.

Her life had seen so many changes since the move, but gaining a
daughter had been one of the best. Kat's mother had died less
than a year after they had moved into the new house. The rumor
mill said that she had been anorexic, and had died from
complications of the illness. Apparently, her husband had an
affair with a slimmer woman, and this had triggered an
unreasonable need to be skinny. Whatever the cause, Lois had
inherited a beautiful little girl to pamper. Kat's father had
been grateful for the help, and relieved that she would receive
some female guidance. Clark had been charmed by the little girl
who followed his son everywhere and showed up at their dinner
table with alarming regularity.

Whatever the cause, Kat was a member of the family. She had stood
with them through chicken pox, driving lessons, and high school
dances. Now, she would somehow make it through the pains of
maturing, and developing an interest that was more than
friendship for CJ. Lois sighed. Somehow, this too would pass.

***

Chapter 7

Stumbling through the front door with her arms full of grocery
bags, Lois made a dive for the ringing telephone. She managed to
grab the receiver in mid-ring and bring it to her ear without
dropping anything breakable. "Hello?"

"Lois! How wonderful to hear your voice."

"Dr. Klein? We haven't heard from you in a while." Lois
carefully tucked the cordless phone between her shoulder and her
cheek, and went into the kitchen to put away her groceries.

"Well, things at the lab have been pretty quiet. Actually, the
reason I was calling was to find out if you and Clark were still
interested in trying to have a child."

"A baby? Well, of course. Have you found out something new?"

"Possibly. I really would like to speak to both of you as soon
as possible. There have been some new developments in the field
of fertility, and they may prove useful for the two of you."

"That sounds wonderful," Lois said, in a cautious voice. She'd
had her hopes up too many times in the past to allow herself to
get carried away. "When would you like to see us?"

"How about tomorrow morning? You can come in before you go to
work; that way, we won't have to deal with explanations to the
lab crew."

"Sounds good. We'll see you in the morning, then."

"Yes, in the morning. Good-bye, Lois."

"Good-bye, Dr. Klein."

***

"What *exactly* did he say?"

Lois sighed once more. Clark had asked that question ten times
since they had left home, and would not accept her answer. She
repeated it once more, "He just said that new fertility
developments might help us. That's all, Clark. He didn't want
to talk about it on the phone."

Clark echoed his wife's sigh as they entered STAR Labs. Dr.
Klein had been caring for him for nearly two decades, and had
known his secret for most of that time. Shortly after Lois and
Clark had been married, Dr. Klein had quietly ushered them into a
back office to inform them that they really shouldn't come to
the lab together unless Clark got rid of the red and blue suit.
Clark had looked stunned, and babbled slightly as he attempted to
brush off the suggestion, but Dr. Klein had been insistent. "You
don't hide your feelings for your wife very well. I think it's
wonderful that you have found someone, and I'm happy for the
both of you, but if an old scientist can figure this out, it's
inevitable that the secret will get out."

Dr. Klein had been so matter-of-fact, and he had been so right.
Shortly after that meeting, Superman stopped giving Lois all the
exclusive interviews, although she still got her fair share.
Further, the Daily Planet always seemed to have Superman's
preferential treatment. Lois stopped showing as much concern over
Superman's activities and allowed her new status as wife and
mother to explain her change of heart. Oddly enough, Superman
continued to keep Lois out of dangerous situations, but the
situations became less frequent as Lois turned her attentions to
her new son and his safety, and her stories became somewhat more
tame. Gradually, the link between Lois and Superman fell into
memory, and Lois and Clark were able to relax, secure that their
secret would remain uncontested.

The situation with Dr. Klein had proved beneficial on many
occasions. He became Clark's primary physician, and CJ's as
well, and learned as much about Kryptonian physiology as possible
in order to keep them healthy. Later, Dr. Klein began studying
with various gynecologists and fertility experts in an effort to
aid his favorite couple in their quest to have their own child.
Finally, he had taken over Lois's gynecological care. He
completed her annual exams and treated her for any symptoms that
appeared to be related to her unique husband. While this had been
initially uncomfortable for both of them, Dr. Klein's
professionalism quickly quelled their discomfort. The visits were
accomplished early in the morning to eliminate speculation, and
allowed them the use of STAR Labs' facilities. As technology
advanced, Dr. Klein had become certain that he would be able to
help the couple conceive. He dedicated a great deal of time to
researching the situation, and kept the couple informed of every
possibility.

Unfortunately, they had not achieved success. The attempts had
become less frequent over the last few years, as the emotional
results of failure had taken a toll on Lois. Dr. Klein had
finally reached a point where he did not wish to provide false
hope. It was due to this caution that he had waited this long to
contact the couple with his newest idea.

It was with a reserved form of excitement that Lois and Clark
entered Dr. Klein's office. Certainly, he wouldn't have
bothered them if he weren't fairly sure this would work. Clark
was especially hopeful, as he still held a great deal of guilt
for not being "compatible" with Lois. Lois was more cautious.
The constant ups and downs of hope and failure was a roller
coaster she didn't want to deal with again. It had been to
painful to dream, only to watch the dream repeatedly die. She had
tried to be happy with all that she had. CJ had been a perfect
son, and Clark a dedicated husband, but she longed to feel the
growth of a baby within her body. She lacked that one connection
with CJ, and it still hurt after all these years.

"Lois, Clark, please come in and have a seat." Dr. Klein
ushered them into his office.

"What can we do for you this morning?" Clark asked as he seated
his wife in a chair across from Dr. Klein's desk and sat down in
the chair next to it.

"I believe it is what I can do for you," Dr. Klein said with a
grin, seating himself behind the cluttered desk. "I have some
news. Last weekend, I attended a conference regarding augmented
artificial insemination. This is a process that allows us to
treat the semen prior to introduction to the ovum, and ensure
fertilization in a non-invasive manner."

Lois looked at Dr. Klein with a silly smile. She had no idea what
he had just said. "Can we have that in English, please?"

Dr. Klein stopped, then blushed slightly as he realized that the
technical terminology had gone over their heads. "Simply put,
there is a field of fertility study that deals with problems
similar to yours. In some cases, the environment of the woman's
body prevents the man's sperm from getting to or fertilizing the
egg. In these cases, we are able to treat the semen, and then
insert it into the woman, so that fertilization becomes more
likely."

Clark set forward in his chair, intrigued but cautious. "But
this isn't a matter of pH or blood typing. Isn't it a little
more complicated with us?"

"It certainly is," Dr. Klein said with a smile. "It has taken
me years to work out, but it was a formula introduced at the
conference last weekend that tied it all together. By using a
complicated chemical soup, I believe I can alter the chemistry of
Clark's semen enough to allow for fertilization of the egg, and
implantation of the pregnancy. Of course, I can't make any
guarantees, but this really looks promising."

"Does this mean shots and surgery again?" Lois groaned,
remembering her previous experience with artificial
insemination.

"Not at all. At least, not at first. All we need to do,
actually, is obtain a semen specimen from Clark, mix it with the
chemical formula, and insert it into your cervix with a small
catheter when you are most likely to be fertile. It's really no
more difficult than a pap smear."

"What if that doesn't work? What if I'm not fertile any
more?" Lois was trying not to get her hopes up.

"We cross that particular bridge when we come to it. Your
menstrual cycles are still regular, so there's no reason to
believe that ovulation has ceased. If it has, we may need to try
some medications to re-establish ovulation, or external
fertilization that we have tried before -- with the addition of
the formula, of course."

"Could this formula hurt Lois?" Clark voiced his primary
concern.

"Absolutely not. The procedure wouldn't be dangerous, either.
Of course, fertilization would not guarantee implantation, and
any pregnancy carries with it a certain level of risk. However,
Lois is healthy, and I feel the benefit would outweigh the
risk."

"When would we start?" Lois asked.

"We could start immediately with determining ovulation. I could
send you home with a basal body thermometer. You would take your
temperature in bed every morning before you get up, and when your
basal temperature increases it indicates that ovulation is
imminent."

Lois smiled at the reminder of their previous attempts to get her
pregnant. "Been there, done that," she quipped.

Clark looked at Lois carefully. He wanted a child, certainly, but
he had CJ. Lois had always been the one concerned that she
absolutely must have a baby to ensure CJ's birth. CJ had been
around for fifteen years, and Clark rarely even considered that
he had come from their future. He assumed that if it was meant to
happen, it just would, and didn't worry beyond that. Lois tended
to analyze things more, and she was adamant that she have a baby.
She looked back at him now with mingled hope and fear that he
would refuse. "I want to do this, Clark."

"Are you sure, honey? We're not kids any more."

Lois considered this for a moment, then directed her question to
Dr. Klein. "He's right. I'm forty-four, and my age may be a
factor with this. Will that be a problem?"

"You are healthy, and your cycle indicates normal ovulation.
Most women wait until well into their thirties, now, to begin
their families, and many wait until their forties. I see no
reason you couldn't carry a child to term with no difficulty."

"Let's do it," Lois said, turning back to Clark.

"You're sure?"

"Absolutely. I have to try."

With a resigned sigh, fearing the worst, Clark turned to Dr.
Klein. "When and where?"

Dr. Klein barely contained his excitement. "I have a good deal
of the formula already prepared. Use this," he said as he handed
Lois the box containing the thermometer, chart, and instructions.
"When you see a rise in temperature, call me immediately. You
and Clark will meet me here that day, and Clark can produce a...
sample. I will treat the semen, and inject it immediately. The
entire procedure should only take about fifteen minutes."

Clark rolled his eyes at the prospect of having to "produce"
once more. He remembered vividly the lecture that Dr. Klein had
given on how to accomplish this so that the initial compatibility
studies could begin over fifteen years ago. They had both been
embarrassed as Dr. Klein described a procedure that any
fourteen-year-old boy is familiar with, yet Clark was totally
ignorant of. The procedure had become frequent in the first years
of his marriage, and he had tolerated this to allow Dr. Klein
ample opportunity to study his sperm in the hopes of a successful
pregnancy. In the last few years this had been necessary less
frequently, and Clark had been grateful. Frankly, it still
embarrassed him.

"I don't mean to be rude," Dr. Klein said, interrupting
Clark's thoughts, "But my staff will be here soon, and I don't
think we want to explain this to them." He ushered them out of
his office and received a hug from Lois and a brief handshake
from Clark.

Once they got to work, Lois cornered Clark in her office. "Do
you really want to do this? You don't seem very happy about the
prospect."

"It's not that," Clark sighed, and put his heart into his
voice as he told her, "I love you. I don't want you hurt if
this doesn't work. I don't want to see you disappointed."

"I can't tell you I'll be happy if this doesn't work. I want
your baby. But I'm not as raw, now. I think I can handle the
disappointment better than wondering if I missed an
opportunity."

"It's your call, Lois. I'm just along for the ride."

"I love you, Clark Kent. You know that, don't you?"

"Always. I love you, too, Lois."

***

"What do you mean, you don't know if you can have a baby? You
had *me!*" CJ was lost. The entire conversation was beyond his
understanding.

Lois looked once more at her husband in a desperate plea for
help. Clark just looked down. He had always wanted to tell CJ the
truth, but he had avoided the issue because he honestly felt that
CJ *was* his son. He wasn't sure about the details, but he was
positive the CJ was his own flesh and blood. Clark had not wanted
to face the concept that CJ might have to be taken away from
them, so he had delayed this discussion until he had nearly
forgotten that it would need to take place.

In retrospect, it was similar to his deception regarding
Superman. He had initially avoided telling CJ because a child
couldn't be trusted, and then it had become a habit. CJ had not
been grateful for being shielded from the truth then, and he was
not thrilled now.

Lois continued, rather annoyed at not receiving more assistance
from Clark. "CJ, we believe that you are ours. Your abilities
certainly prove that you are your father's son. We just don't
exactly know, well, *when* you came from."

Clark finally decided that Lois needed some help. "CJ, we've
told you about Tempus, and how time travel is possible. Well, you
were brought to us nearly a year after we were married, but you
were already a few months old. We can only assume it was H.G.
Wells who brought you to us." Clark sat down next to his son on
the couch, and put his arm around the boy. "You came with my
blanket, the one that Grandma found me in, and a letter that told
us to keep you safe. Apparently, you were in some form of danger
in your time, and that was a better time for you to be in."

CJ looked at his father with huge eyes, clouded with hurt. "So
I'm not really adopted?"

Clark hugged his son, as Lois came and sat on CJ's other side.
"You are ours," Lois told him. "I've never doubted that."

"CJ, it was really hard at first. The first few weeks, we just
waited for someone to come and take you away," Lois said
quietly. "I tried so hard not to get attached. We didn't even
give you a name. It was your grandmother that named you; she just
started calling you CJ." Lois smiled at the memory as she
continued, "She said you looked so much like your father that we
just had to name you Clark. It was too confusing having two
Clarks around, so she started calling you CJ for short. She never
really told us if that was to abbreviate Clark Jerome, or Clark
Junior. When we finally had to establish some paperwork to take
care of you, we followed her lead and made it official." She
looked at her son, putting all the love she had for him into her
gaze. "You are our son, however we got you."

Clark had been watching the emotions cross his wife's face. She
had run the gamut ranging from fear to nostalgia, and then back
to a transparent love that only a mother could show. He
remembered those first few weeks as well. He had been learning to
juggle the responsibilities of family with the implications of
Superman. He had attempted to think of the situation as
temporary, but as time wore on, he realized that CJ deserved more
than the temporary love that they had been giving him. They had
decided to live for the day, believing that they would have him
forever, and enjoying the time for what it was.

"Your grandparents were the only ones who really allowed
themselves to fall in love with you, at first," Clark told his
son. "From day one, they just seemed to know you. I guess it was
because you looked so much like me. Anyway, they were a great
example for us to follow. We figured that if we kept waiting for
something that might never happen, we could be losing out on a
lot. We got so used to having you here, and being your parents,
that it didn't seem to matter any more how it all started."

CJ sat for a moment, absorbing the information. He was hurt. He
couldn't believe that his parents hadn't told him about this.
What was more, he couldn't believe that his *grandparents*
hadn't told him. They had always been honest, and to find out
that they weren't even sure where he came from was making him
doubt his identity. Sure, they said he was theirs, but how could
they be sure?

CJ thought about running out of the room. He thought about
yelling, or crying, or just striking out. Nothing seemed
appropriate. He knew that he should do something, say something,
but he didn't have the slightest clue where to start. Finally,
he settled on the one thing that always helped. "Can I call
Grandma?"

Lois gave Clark an official "I told you so" glare, and nodded
to her son. She had wanted to have the discussion with the Kents
here. CJ quickly went upstairs to use his own phone to make the
call. She was left sitting next to her husband, and she couldn't
help but smile. "He's yours, all right," she told him.

"What do you mean?"

"When he has no clue what to do, he calls Smallville," she
replied with another grin.

Clark blushed slightly, but he did have the good grace not to
argue the point. He didn't call Smallville quite as often how as
he had done in the past, but for most of his life he had relied
on advice that came nearly daily from Kansas. He had received
advice on work, on women, on Lois and on raising CJ, with
reassuring regularity. It had become a slight point of contention
between them, early in the marriage, not because Lois was jealous
of Martha's knowledge, but because she had been unsure of her
own place in Clark's life. Once he had convinced her that she
was always first in his life, she had found that Martha *was* an
invaluable source of information, and had begun to call
Smallville quite frequently herself.

Lois leaned sideways into Clark, and felt his arm go around her
shoulders. She had her own doubts about CJ's reaction, but she
was certain that he would accept the situation eventually. After
all, he had adjusted to being the son of Superman with relative
ease. Now that she thought about it, Martha had been a big part
of that process as well. Lois still wondered if she would ever be
that good as a mother.

With a sigh that echoed that of his wife, Clark cuddled next to
Lois and waited for CJ to come back downstairs. They would get
through this, too. They always did. He did wonder why nothing was
ever easy.

***

The phone rang several times before Martha was able to reach it.
Ironically, after running so quickly to grab the receiver, she
realized that Jonathan had picked up the upstairs line. Disgusted
with her speed, Martha nearly put down the phone, but stopped
when she heard CJ's small voice. "Is Gramma there?"

Martha immediately recognized the distress in her grandson's
voice, and the immature phrasing of her name. She attempted not
to panic as she responded, "I'm here, sweetie. What's
wrong?"

"Why didn't anyone tell me I wasn't born with Mom and Dad?"
If possible, his voice became even tinier.

Martha responded to the hurt in the child's voice with a quiet
authority. "You most certainly were born with your parents,
honey. We just aren't sure quite when."

CJ thought about that explanation for a moment, reassured by the
confidence in his grandmother's voice. She didn't sound like
she cared if he didn't know where he came from. "So, why
didn't anyone tell me?"

"Frankly, son," Jonathan added, "It never really came up.
It's kind of like when we told your dad that he was adopted. We
told him as soon as his strength became an issue, but before
that, it just didn't seem important."

CJ hadn't considered that his father was adopted. He wondered
briefly if his family was just cursed with family secrets, and
decided that it wasn't really the issue. He didn't like being
lied to, but they had told him now.

"I hate it when they lie to me," he told his grandparents.
"I'm not a baby, and they shouldn't treat me that way."

"You're right, honey," Martha told him. "But," she added,
"they did tell you today. Maybe they realize that you are
growing up, and this is how they are telling you."

"Maybe," CJ conceded. "Can I call you back later?"

"Of course, son. You go talk to your parents." Jonathan's
voice was quiet, but filled with pride.

"Yes, sweetie. Go talk to your parents," Martha added.

CJ hung up the phone and went to confront his parents once more.

***

Chapter 8

CJ discussed the new development with Kat the next day. They had
been let out of school early due to a teacher work day, and had a
little time to talk before they would each need to attend their
individual jobs.

Initially, CJ had been leery of talking to Kat at all. He was
still feeling pretty stupid about ruining her date, regardless of
the fact that he really had helped. It had embarrassed her, and
that fact alone embarrassed *him*. On the other hand, Andy's car
was still not fixed and Kat needed a ride home. Her ankle had
merely been sprained, but the walk home was uncomfortable even
without the crutches. She was grateful for the offer of a ride.

CJ had been surprised that she hadn't just asked him. After all,
it wasn't as though it were out of his way. However, it did make
him feel good to offer, and even better when she accepted with a
smile.

"So, what do you think?" CJ asked her as they pulled up in
front of her house.

Kat sighed. "I honestly don't know what to think. On the other
hand, being adopted is less strange than being an alien, so I
guess this isn't the biggest thing you've had to deal with
lately." She smiled, and looked over at him to see if he shared
the humor in the situation. What she saw was big brown eyes that
were so sad that she didn't know what to do with him. "CJ,
however they got you, they love you. They have been here for you,
and taken care of you, and that's more than my folks have done
when they got me the usual way."

CJ closed his eyes a moment and thought about what Kat had said.
She was right, despite his resistance to her answer. His parents
*were* great. They had loved him, taught him, and supported him
throughout all the pitfalls of growing up. They had held his hand
when he was frightened and been honest with him when they could
easily have lied. They did love him, and that was more important
than a situation that they had no control over, and yet had made
the best of.

CJ had a lot of thinking to do. He would have to move a long way
before he could forgive this, but he was now certain it would
happen. He needed to apologize to his parents first; they must be
frantic with the way he had been acting. Then he would call his
grandparents. He should have listened to them in the first
place.

With a faint smile, he leaned over and kissed Kat lightly on the
lips in thanks. It was just a peck, and it shouldn't have been
any more than a thank-you, but somehow it *was* more. Kat blushed
from her neck to her hairline, and made a quick excuse to exit
the truck. She nearly fell when she didn't remember her sore
ankle, but she quickly recovered and hobbled into her house.

CJ sat in the truck for a moment, watching Kat stumble towards
the house. Why had he done that, he wondered? Why would he kiss
her... and on the lips, too? He had never done that. It had just
seemed the thing to do, but now he wasn't so sure. She had
certainly reacted in a funny way to the little kiss. With a final
shake of his head at the strange ways of females, he turned off
the truck and walked across the street to his house.

***

The next morning, as Lois woke, she snuggled into her husband's
back. She was grateful to wake up beside him for a change.
Normally, early morning was a busy time for him, and she wasn't
used to having someone warm to snuggle against before the alarm
went off.

Before she got too comfortable, or involved, she rolled away from
him and reached into the drawer of her nightstand. She grabbed
the glass thermometer that Dr. Klein had given her and gave it a
good shake before slipping it beneath her tongue. After three
minutes, she read the mercury and reached for her pen and chart.
Once she had graphed the little number, she did a double-take,
looking at the chart. Her temperature had risen a full
four-tenths of a degree from her normal basal body temperature.
This was it.

She tried to contain her excitement, but was unable to do so.
Unfortunately, this wasn't her cue to wake her husband up in a
soft and fuzzy way, it was her signal to call Dr. Klein. She
gently patted Clark on the back until he woke up a little, then
she explained, "Honey, you have to wake up. My temperature is
up. We need to call Dr. Klein."

Clark burrowed more deeply into his pillow, hugging it tightly to
his chest, and sighed. "Take some aspirin, honey. I'll tell
Perry you're sick."

Lois almost laughed at this blast from the past. It had been a
long time since they had worried about placating Perry White.
With a wistful, remembering kind of smile, she tried again.
"Clark, I need you to wake up."

Clark grumbled a little more. While normally he was quite the
morning person, he had only been in bed for about an hour today.
There had been a particularly nasty hostage situation that had
required Superman's assistance, and while he was thrilled to
have the headline to call in to the paper, he was also exhausted
after twenty-two hours without sleep. Finally, he rolled over to
see the excited face of his wife. This was odd. Normally, he was
up and ready to go, and Lois was still grumbling and dragging far
behind him. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing is wrong," she answered. "My temperature is up, and
we need to call Dr. Klein so he can perform the procedure."

Clark's eyes flew open as what she had said finally penetrated
his mind. This could be it. After nearly seventeen years of
waiting and wondering, this could really be it. He was trying not
to get his hopes up, but it was really hard. They had wanted this
so much, and to have the possibility here was amazing. He placed
his palm against Lois's cheek, and looked into her eyes. She
would be the mother of his child... he just knew it. He always
had.

After kissing her softly on the lips, he left the bed to give Dr.
Klein a call. They agreed to meet him at STAR Labs, as they had
planned to do. Clark showered at super-speed, and left Lois to do
the same while he prepared some breakfast.

Lois was considerably slower as she showered, dressed, and put on
her make-up. After doing so, she walked down the hall and knocked
softly on her son's door. Once she had made sure that he was
indeed up and getting ready for school, she met Clark downstairs.
He handed her a travel cup of coffee and an English muffin with
an egg inside. She smiled at his obvious attempt to hurry her
along when she saw that he already had both her laptop case and
her purse tucked under his arm.

"Ready to go?" he asked as he started for the door without
waiting for her answer.

Lois smiled at his retreating back. "I guess I am." With that,
she followed him to the car.

***

Lois sighed as she allowed Dr. Klein to assist her to a sitting
position on the examining table and pulled the sheet more firmly
around her legs to keep herself covered. This was still vaguely
embarrassing, although he had been much more adept with his
bedside manner than he had once thought possible. Years of caring
for Clark's needs, as well as Lois's, had taught him to be
slightly more tactful than he had once been while describing the
demise of a snowman to a shrinking Clark.

Clark stepped forward from his position at the head of the exam
table and placed his hand on Lois's shoulder. "How long before
we know, Dr. Klein?"

The doctor considered the question for a moment before answering.
"Assuming the procedure is successful, fertilization should
occur in three to four days. After that, implantation could take
as much as another week. The soonest it would show up on a urine
test would be one week from now, but most likely it would be
closer to two." Dr. Klein noted the pained expression on their
faces, and took pity on them. "I'll tell you what: I'll send
some test kits with you. Just follow the directions inside, and
we'll know as soon as possible. You should start using them one
week from today. You really can't expect a positive result prior
to that."

Clark thanked the doctor and stayed with Lois while she dressed.
They were both lost in their own thoughts; Lois was wondering if
this time would be different, and Clark was thinking about how
the morning had gone.

Clark had learned long ago that the embarrassing process of
providing Dr. Klein with his samples went much more smoothly when
Lois was present. Her... assistance... made an otherwise
humiliating experience not only faster, but almost enjoyable.
This morning had certainly been a surprise. Lois had helped him
out in producing a specimen, and then had asked him to stay while
Dr. Klein performed the procedure. As promised, it had taken only
a few moments, and there had been no needles necessary, for which
they were grateful. Lois hadn't appeared to suffer any pain, and
that in itself was a relief.

Clark had always hated the infertility treatments that Lois had
to endure. For years, they had dealt with medications,
fertilization procedures, and other difficult and painful
experiences. Of course, the worst part was always that the pain
was for nothing. It simply led to more pain with the expected
result wasn't achieved. The worst part for him was knowing that,
while the infertility was his fault, she was the one who had to
endure the pain.

He watched Lois pull on her blouse and begin buttoning it. He
walked over to her and placed his hands over hers. She looked up
and met his eyes, and he was not surprised to see tears in hers.
He pulled her into his arms for a moment, comforting her. "You
know," he told her, "whether this works or not, I still love
you. We have each other, and we have CJ. We're still very
lucky."

Lois sniffled slightly, resting her head against his shoulder.
She hated this. She still felt silly when she cried about losing
something she never had. "I know, but I just want to feel your
baby inside me." She lifted her head and looked into the depths
of his big brown eyes. "I feel like I missed something by not
being pregnant. I mean, I never sacrificed my figure or tossed my
cookies. I feel like I never paid my dues, and someone is going
to show up to collect."

"I know that won't happen, Lois. If it did, I'd send them
packing at super-speed. CJ is *ours!* We love him, we raised him,
and we won't give him up to anyone."

Lois put her head back on Clark's shoulder. She had known he
would say that, she had just needed the reassurance. They had
dealt with their fears of losing CJ, and their concerns about his
origin, on many occasions through the years. Gratefully, the
discussions had become less fearful and less frequent as the
years progressed. There were even times now when they forgot
entirely that he was not acquired in the usual way. At the very
least, they almost forgot.

With a sigh, Lois pulled away from Clark and finished getting
dressed. Clark watched her, reminding himself that they did have
to go to work today as, once again, he realized how beautiful his
wife was. She had her brown hair down today, and it curled softly
at her shoulders as it had when he had first seen her. She was no
longer self-conscious about the occasional gray strand, but
considered them to be awards for surviving a teenager. They were
her badges of honor, as much as her Kerth Awards were. Once she
was dressed, Lois and Clark linked hands and went back to Dr.
Klein's office for the promised test kits and any other
instructions that the doctor might have for them.

***

Work went slowly for the Kents. While Lois sorted through
possible stories to lead the headlines on the following day,
Clark ran the daily staff meeting. Granted, Clark wasn't an
editor, but no one on staff would consider questioning his
authority. He wasn't just the boss's husband, he was an
experienced journalist who had been assisting his wife in the
running of the Planet since she had taken over her editorial
position. He was good at it, he liked it, and if there was any
question asked, it was why he wasn't promoted to an editorial
assistant as he should have been.

Lois and Clark had considered the idea of allowing promotion to a
full assistant editor, but always decided against it. The first
problem was that of Superman. An editor couldn't be running off
every time something newsworthy happened. The second problem was
that of the job. It was bad enough to have constant demands on
Lois's time, especially when CJ had been younger, but to have
those same demands placed on Clark would have made a family life
impossible. The entire purpose of the editorial assistants was to
allow the editor time for a life, not to take away their spouse.

Actually, Lois had completely rearranged the command structure
within the city room, and her set-up was much more effective than
the one Perry had allowed. She was the day editor, and she had
Andrew to cover evenings and Pat to cover nights. Their salary
was little more than the average reporter made, but the
experience was excellent, and the benefit of working for the
Planet made the jobs irresistible. Lois, of course, made all the
final decisions, and had Clark to help her out during the day,
but there was always enough work for everyone.

Lois sighed deeply. Clark heard it, and was immediately at her
side. When she glanced up and saw him, she smiled. "You know, if
I do get pregnant, you can't stay by my side the entire time."

Clark gave her a dirty look before replying, "Did you need
something?"

Lois lifted onto her toes, and kissed him rather soundly. "Yes,
I need you. Always." She kissed him once more.

Clark relaxed somewhat, and allowed himself to enjoy his wife's
kisses. After a moment, he put his arms around her, and deepened
his kiss slightly. As she pulled away, she asked him, "We're
okay, aren't we?" She knew he would understand.

"Yeah," he replied. Then he put his arms back around her and
pulled her back to his embrace. "We're very okay."

***

Chapter 9

Kat and CJ were escorted into a very small office at STAR Labs.
They were told that Dr. Klein would be with them shortly, and
that they were to wait. CJ allowed Kat to sit in the chair
closest to the desk, and he paced through the office. It didn't
take much distance to cover the small area, but he paced anyway.

He had asked Kat to come with him for this visit. His parents had
no idea that he was in Metropolis without permission, and it was
his hope that they wouldn't find out. If they did, he could at
least say that he hadn't gone alone, and that might get him out
of a little bit of trouble.

It wasn't that he wanted to go behind their backs. The opposite
was true, he wanted them to know all about this. However, he
wanted his answers from a professional before they found out that
he was asking. He didn't want them to be hurt by his questions,
and, as much as they loved him, it would hurt them for him to
investigate his origins.

He supposed that it was being the son of two investigative
reporters that drove him to look for the answers. They had told
him that they had spent months looking for the reasons, back when
he was an infant, but they had not actively pursued it in many
years. After a time, they had simply decided that he was their
son, and it was their responsibility to raise him. They had
stopped asking the hard questions, and just accepted that CJ was
theirs forever.

CJ wasn't ready to accept the same ideas. He didn't want to
leave them, but he did want to know just why he was here. If he
hadn't been born to this time, what time was his? He was
obviously their son -- or, at least, *Clark's* son -- but when
was he born, and what situation could possibly be so bad that
they would send him so far away? He was confused and angered by
not having the answers, and, if they were indeed unavailable, he
wanted to know it first-hand.

Bernard Klein entered his office with a cup of coffee in one hand
and a scientific journal in the other. He had been told that he
had visitors, but he had been so involved in the article he was
reading that the information truly hadn't registered yet. He
pulled the door closed with one foot, and began walking towards
his desk by habit.

CJ had been just as involved with his own thoughts as Dr. Klein
had been with his journal. As a result, the two males collided at
full speed, and both of them jumped back from the contact.
Bernard fell into the desk, spilling his coffee all over -- and,
most especially, all over *Kat!* Thankfully, he was as forgetful
about his coffee as he was with his message, and the beverage was
not hot in the least.

Everything seemed to happen at once. Kat screamed, Dr. Klein
cursed, and CJ jumped backwards. Then, time seemed to stop as all
eyes focused on the teenage boy hovering inches off the floor. CJ
hadn't been thinking about anything except for getting out of
the way, but he found himself suspended several inces above the
ground. CJ was so startled, once he realized why they were
staring at him, that he dropped quickly to the ground. As quickly
as the excitement had begun, it was over. Dr. Klein was quite
certain, though, that he had indeed seen CJ fly.

For the most part, Dr. Klein was less surprised than the
teenagers. He had been expecting this manifestation to occur, and
felt it was just a matter of time until it happened. He had
followed this child from infancy through childhood, and now into
adolescence, and their was little that would surprise him.

"Well, CJ, I suppose that answers one question," he said in his
best clinical voice. CJ looked over at Kat to see that while she
was quite wet, she was less frightened than he was. He attempted
to duplicate the action, and was not successful. Apparently, it
was not something within his voluntary control yet. That wasn't
really unusual; it had taken time for him to recognize most of
his abilities, such as strength and x-ray vision. Initially they
had been sporadic and involuntary, and as they developed, he had
been more able to both recognize and control them. He assumed
that this would be the same way.

"I guess I have something new to tell my dad," he said in a
shaky voice. Kat smiled at him as she brushed at the coffee on
her t-shirt and jeans. Dr. Klein handed her some paper towels and
muttered an apology.

"So," he asked CJ, "What brings you to my office?" He was
fairly sure that the boy was here without his parents'
permission, but he didn't want to deal with that just yet. He
was certain that the boy was here for a reason.

CJ thought about several ways to phrase the questions, and, in
fact, he had been rehearsing it for days in his mind. Still, even
after all of his imagining, the question came out sounding silly.
"I want to know when I come from."

"I assume you mean originally," Dr. Klein said.

"Well, yeah. I'm pretty sure that my parents are, well, my
parents. But they haven't had any kids, so I want to find out
just where I fit in." He seated himself next to Kat, perched on
the edge of her chair, and waited.

Dr. Klein nodded. "I understand your concerns, but our Temporal
Investigations Section really hasn't discovered anything new in
the last several years. We do have a device that will displace
time, but we have no clue how it works or how to control it.
Frankly, temporal work is so dangerous that we have barely
scratched the surface of what might be possible." Seeing the
disappointment on the teenager's face, he decided to go out on a
limb, and show the boy what little he knew.

Kat was missing the majority of the conversation. Not only did
she have no idea what they were talking about, but she was
beginning to feel rather clammy.

"Come with me, CJ." Dr. Klein left the room quickly, leaving CJ
and Kat to follow behind him. CJ grabbed Kat's hand and quickly
dragged her along. They followed the scientist until he reached
his destination. It was a large locked door marked "Temporal
Displacement Laboratory".

Despite the sign that limited entrance to authorized personnel,
Dr. Klein pulled out a key card that allowed him to unlock the
heavy door. He mumbled something about rank having its privileges
as he entered and held the door for CJ and Kat to follow him in.

It was actually a rather nondescript little room. There were a
few instruments and machines laying about but, for the most part,
the lab appeared to be deserted. Dr. Klein unlocked one of the
many cabinets and removed a small device. It resembled a small
remote control unit, and CJ briefly wondered what it could be
for. Dr. Klein explained quickly what the device was.

"CJ, this is really the only clue that we have as to how to
initiate temporal displacement. We can operate it, but we have no
clue how to set the device for a specific destination in time or
space." He put the black device onto the nearest table, and
began to open other cabinets as he spoke. "We believe that you
were delivered with a device of this nature, but we can't prove
anything. This device was left following the incident with Tempus
several years ago. A similar device was used to place your father
into an area of time without dimension, according to your mother.
We have been able to disassemble the device and reproduce it,
with consistent success, but we have no idea how or why it
works."

Dr. Klein finally found what he was looking for, and brought the
weathered papers over to CJ. "This is the documentation that you
father was given by H.G. Wells regarding the manufacture of an
interdimensional transport device. We have kept it under lock and
key, of course, but frankly, he's the only one who has been able
to duplicate it. The theories simply don't make any sense to the
rest of us. There is something at the molecular level that we
don't understand that causes this machine to control its own
temporal stability. We have asked for his help in the matter, but
he feels that if he helps, it will alter the time line and do
damage. He feels that we need to understand the ideas on our own
if we are to hope to master them. Frankly, I have to agree with
him."

Dr. Klein seated himself on the edge of the lab table as he
continued. "So, you can see what we are working with. We use
this laboratory in conjunction with the military experimentation
on space anomalies in order to learn what we can, but temporal
control is still beyond our abilities. Even if we understood it,
we couldn't necessarily find your specific line of time.
Apparently, there are multiple realities at any given time, and
no way to know which one you came from. Because of your
physiology, I do firmly believe that you are Clark's direct
descendant. In addition to that, we have the DNA tests that I did
when you were a baby, but we don't know from what time or
dimension that you might have originated. I wish I could be more
help."

CJ sighed. He had known that his parents were thorough, but he
had hoped that they might have missed something. Apparently,
science hadn't come as far since their efforts as he had hoped.

Kat hated to interrupt the discussion, but she was beginning to
feel miserable. Her clothes were damp, and the constant airflow
that maintained the temperature near so many computers had her
thoroughly chilled. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I have a pair
of sweats in the truck. They need to be washed, but at least
they're dry. Can you show me how to get back down to the
garage?

Dr. Klein looked at the young lady as if he was just noticing
that she was damp. "Oh, I'm so sorry! Let me get you some help
with that." He stood and used the intercom to call for one of
his lab assistants. A young woman in a white lab coat arrived to
escort Kat down to the garage, and assured her that she would
help her find a place to change once she had her dry clothes.

After Kat had left with the lab tech, Dr. Klein escorted CJ back
to his own office. Once there, he asked if CJ had any additional
questions.

"Actually, I do have one," the boy said, blushing quite
thoroughly. "It isn't about where I come from, though."

"What is it?"

"Well, I was wondering, well..." He trailed off for a moment as
he gathered his thoughts. "You had to help my mom try to get
pregnant, right? Because my dad wasn't compatible with Earth
physiology? I mean, she's not pregnant yet -- that we know of,
anyway -- but she's trying."

"That is true. The chromosomes appeared to be compatible for
union, but the outer areas of the cell had different densities. I
used a chemical to minimize this difference, and allow your
mother to become pregnant."

CJ continued to blush. This was not an easy discussion, but he
wanted to know what his future had in store for him. If he
couldn't understand his past, he could at least know what might
be coming up. "So, will I have the same problem?"

"I suppose it's possible," Dr. Klein told CJ. "We wouldn't
know for sure without tests. It's possible that you would be
more compatible because your mother is, presumably, from
Earth."

"Could we do the tests?" CJ asked in a small voice.

"When you are a little older, I'm sure we will. There doesn't
seem to be much reason to do so yet. You aren't planning on
having any children in the near future, are you?" Dr. Klein
tried to lighten the moment with the joke, but CJ was
determined.

"I have to wait for everything! I have to wait to see where I
come from, I have to wait to learn about time displacement, and I
don't want to wait for this!" CJ was near tears. The entire day
had been so frustrating that he was almost ready to scream.

Dr Klein smiled. He supposed it could do little harm to run the
test on CJ. Aside from contributing to the delinquency of a minor
with the reading material that they kept in the little room, he
didn't think that allowing the boy this one answer would upset
anyone too much. "Okay, CJ. Come with me. We'll need to get a
specimen."

"Specimen?" CJ asked as he followed the doctor once more from
the room. Dr. Klein had to smile. Once he explained the
procedure, CJ would probably decline to do it, and that would
take care of the problem without him having to even do the
tests.

***

The blonde lab assistant had accompanied Kat down to CJ's truck,
and then allowed her back into the building. She led Kat to the
ladies' locker room so that she could change, and, once she was
dry and warm again, she led her back towards the room that Dr.
Klein had been in. Just as they left the elevator, the
technician's pager went off, requesting that she report
immediately for some procedure on the eleventh floor.

Kat saw the undecided look on the young woman's face. She also
saw the door to the room she had been in earlier. "Just go,"
she told the technician. "I can see the door from here. Thanks
for your help," she finished with a smile.

The woman returned Kat's smile and re-entered the elevator. The
truth was, she had been away from her section for too long, and
she didn't want to be reprimanded.

As the elevator door closed behind her, Kat began walking towards
the room. Once there, she pushed on the door and it slowly swung
open. Dr. Klein had not made sure that the door had closed and
locked behind him. No one was there. She wondered if they would
be back, and sat down on the table to wait for them.

The room was quiet. She saw the little device sitting on the
table, the one that Dr. Klein had said could manipulate time.
Picking up the seemingly harmless little box, she looked at it
more closely. It was small, and the texture of the buttons was
unusual. They weren't smooth as she would have imagined them to
be. Stroking her fingertips across the buttons, she depressed one
by accident.

She dropped the device immediately, jumping off the table and
away from the large doorway that appeared in the air. She watched
the glowing doorway appear; then, after a moment, it seemed to
collapse in on itself and disappear. She stood, shaken, for a
moment, just looking at the space where the doorway had been.
Grateful she had not been any closer, she quickly left the room
and pulled the door closed behind her. She tugged on it once more
to ensure that it had locked, then she retraced her steps to Dr.
Klein's office.

She felt strange walking through the corridors herself, but was
relieved when she saw his office ahead. *This* door was locked,
so she carefully sat on the floor by the door, holding her gym
bag of wet clothes on her lap, and waited for Dr. Klein to come
back to his office.

***

When CJ and Dr. Klein returned to the office, Kat had fallen
asleep. CJ woke her and told her that it was time to leave. If
she wondered about the slight blush on his face, or the "test"
that Dr. Klein mentioned while they were leaving, she had the
good grace not to ask. After all, she certainly didn't want to
be questioned about what she had been doing while away from
them.

The trip back to Claremont was uneventful, and Kat found it a
little odd that CJ wouldn't look at her. He dropped her off in
front of her house, and then pulled up into his own driveway. He
didn't even tell her goodbye, or thank her for making the trip
with him. He didn't say anything, really.

CJ locked his truck and went into the house through the kitchen
door. He was still lost in thought from his experience at the
lab, and still embarrassed by the procedure that he had done. He
had considered backing out of the test once it was explained to
him, but had been even more embarrassed to do that. After all, he
had practically begged for it, even if he had not known what he
was getting into. He had expected a blood test, or even a urine
test, but to have to do *that* was humiliating. He really wanted
to forget that it had happened.

CJ grabbed a piece of cold pizza from the refrigerator and
checked the noteboard to find out what his mother needed him to
do. As expected, she would be late tonight. The Friday evening
staff meetings usually ran pretty late, and he had counted on
that when he had planned his after-school trip into Metropolis.
He noted that he was to do a load of laundry and to start
something for dinner. A second glance into the refrigerator gave
him another piece of cold pizza and a pound of hamburger that he
was certain he could do something with.

He browned the ground beef and then added some diced onions.
While he raided a cabinet for canned tomatoes, the telephone
rang. He stirred the beef with one hand while he grabbed the
kitchen extension with the other. "Yeah?" he asked into the
phone.

"What's for dinner there?" Kat asked him. She was still a
little confused over his lack of conversation on the drive home,
and she wanted to make sure it wasn't something she had done.

"Mmm, looks like chili for now. How about there?"

"Well, looks like either Chinese or pizza here. I haven't
decided who to call." She twirled the phone cord in her fingers
as she waited for CJ's reply.

"How about you just come here?" he invited. "Mom isn't home
yet, so I'm cooking. It should be edible, anyway." His
mother's cooking still bore the brunt of more jokes than they
would admit to, but the reputation was well earned.

"Sounds better than take-out," she replied. "Want me to come
help?"

"Sure. You do the best garlic bread around," he said with a
smile into the receiver.

"On my way!" She hung up the phone, and headed to the house
across the street. Odd, how that always felt more like home than
her own house, she thought. Dismissing the idea, she bounded up
the three steps leading to the kitchen doorway and opened the
door. It never occurred to her to use the front door -- that was
for *guests* -- nor did she think to knock.

***

Chapter 10

Lois and Clark sat side by side on the floor with their backs
against the bathtub. Together, they stared at the little plastic
container that held the answer to their future. This had been
their routine for the last three mornings. Each day, Lois had
placed a urine specimen in the little container, carefully
followed directions, and watched her hopes die. As they waited,
they gave one another some comfort as they discussed every
measure of their future except for the tiny person that might or
might not be there.

After the requisite ten minutes, Clark stood, and held out a hand
to help Lois up. It had been two weeks since Dr. Klein's
procedure, and they had been putting themselves through this
torture since the tenth day. Dr. Klein had insisted that they
could not know to the day when a test would be positive, but he
recommended daily testing until they were sure the procedure was
ineffective. If this was the case, Lois would begin taking her
temperatures again, and they would repeat the procedure for two
more months. Lois didn't really want to go through months and
months of waiting, but she would do what was necessary to
conceive Clark's child.

Lois reached for the plastic unit, and glanced inside for the
negative result she was certain would be present. When she
encountered a small "+" sign, she was so surprised that it
didn't register. Clark reached around her and took the unit from
her. He looked at it for a moment more as a wide smile spread
across his face. When he looked down at his wife, he was shocked
to see tears streaming down her face. He set the unit on the sink
and wrapped his arms around his trembling wife. Lois sobbed in
his arms for several minutes before calming enough to smile up at
her husband.

"This is for real, isn't it?" Lois asked in a trembling
voice.

"Congratulations, sweetheart."

***

"The blood HCG confirms what your urine test indicated.
Implantation has occurred, and Lois is most certainly pregnant."
Dr. Klein said these words as he took his seat behind the still
cluttered desk. "We will need to monitor your HCG level
throughout early pregnancy to evaluate the development of the
embryo, but for now everything appears to be progressing
nicely."

"If everything is fine, why do you need more blood tests?"
Clark asked with concern.

"Well, there are several reasons. At this time, the baby is too
small to see through ultrasound, and this is our best indication
of continued development. Also, I would like to chart the
pregnancy quite closely, to use as a reference point should CJ
ever decide to have children. For that matter, this information
would be useful if you were ever to father another child as
well."

"Let's just get through this one," Lois said with a grin.

Clark returned her smile, and squeezed her shoulder gently. Then
he sat back and listened to Dr. Klein quiz Lois on how she was
feeling, what she was eating and every other tiny aspect of her
life since the procedure Dr. Klein had performed two weeks ago.
He made arrangements with her to meet every other morning for a
quick blood draw to monitor her hormonal changes, and gave her a
renewal for the pre-natal vitamin prescription that he had
originated before they had even accomplished the procedure. She
took the prescription, as well as another for an iron supplement,
and thanked Dr. Klein before standing to leave.

Clark was quiet as he escorted his wife back to work. They needed
to make decisions regarding telling their son about the
pregnancy, and calling their parents, but for now he wanted to
just enjoy this time with his wife. The thought that a part of
him was growing within her body was at once thrilling and
terrifying.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" Clark asked once they
reached the relative privacy of her office.

"I'm fine, Clark. I'm wonderful! I'm *pregnant*," Lois said
with a giggle. Her face was alight with the knowledge that she
was carrying the child of the man she loved. "Oh, no. You are
not going to worry for the next eight and a half months! I'm
perfectly fine, and I intend to enjoy this time."

"I'm supposed to worry; it's my job."

"Wait a minute -- I'm the cynic, and you're the eternal
optimist. That's the way it's always been, and I refuse to
allow things to change now." Lois shook her head as she lectured
Clark.

He finally broke into a small smile as he placed his palm against
her cheek. "We're gonna have a baby..." he said with wonder.

"Yes," she said, turning her head to kiss his palm.

***

The evening was spend talking with CJ and calling Lois and
Clark's parents. Martha insisted on coming to visit as soon as
possible, while Ellen lectured Lois on the potential ruination of
her figure. CJ was both excited at the news and concerned where
the baby would sleep. Clark laughed at CJ's worry over losing
his own room, and assured him that he would not be displaced by
the small child. Lois and Clark went to bed happy, and enjoyed
the dreams of their future family.

Quickly, Lois became accustomed to her family dictating her
actions in life. Apparently, pregnancy entitled husbands and
mothers to decide when she was hungry, tired or working too much.
Lois took all of this with an unusual level of complacency. The
fact was, she *was* tired. She was always hungry, slightly dizzy,
and she maintained a slight level of nausea at all times. Clark
became concerned when she had difficulty holding down meals and
began sleeping twelve hours each night, but his experience with
pregnant women was limited, and all the books assured him that
fatigue and morning sickness were quite normal.

By the time Lois reached her ninth week of pregnancy, her
situation had worsened dramatically. She was no longer able to
work, and frequently was admitted to the hospital for fluids. Dr.
Klein enlisted the help of a renowned obstetrician to aid him in
caring for her, but it was becoming clear that Lois's body was
having a great deal of difficulty with the pregnancy. By
mid-August, Dr. Klein began to wonder if Lois could possibly make
it to term.

Lois collapsed at home in Clark's arms one evening, and he
quickly flew her to the hospital. The test results were terrible,
indicating that Lois was suffering from blood poisoning as well
as dehydration and pregnancy. Further tests revealed that the
baby was demanding far too much of Lois's system, and Dr. Klein
began to recommend termination of the pregnancy.

"No. Absolutely not!" Lois screamed when Dr. Klein presented
the idea.

"Lois, I don't think you realize just how dangerous this is.
Even if we are able to maximize your immune response, maintaining
that state for the next seven months would be impossible. I
don't see how you could live to term to deliver this baby." Dr.
Klein spoke quietly, but with authority.

"I can't kill my baby," Lois sobbed.

"Honey, the baby can't live if you die," Clark pleaded. He
knew that Dr. Klein would never introduce this solution if there
were any other options.

"What if you can keep me going until the baby can be born early?
How long would I have to carry him?" Lois had always believed
that she carried a son.

"Well, with current NICU procedures, we can usually gestate
children as long as they pass the twelve-week mark."

"That's it, then! That's what, three more weeks?" Lois was
encouraged by the hope in this choice.

"Closer to four," Dr. Klein replied.

"Then that's what we do! I will *not* let you kill this baby
just to save me some discomfort."

"Lois," Clark interrupted, "this isn't inconvenience. It's
your *life*."

"Clark, promise... you won't let... them do this," Lois
pleaded through her tears. "Just get... me through the next...
couple of weeks. Then they can keep the... baby alive, and
I'll... get better. Please, Clark. We... won't get another
chance. Dr. Klein... won't do this again... and you... know it.
Please, I don't... want to lose... my baby," Lois finished with
a sob.

Clark closed his eyes and held his wife's hand as she sobbed. He
wanted the baby, but he wasn't willing to risk Lois's life to
have it. "Is there any chance it could work?" he asked Dr.
Klein quietly.

"Yes. The risks are high, but if we keep her here with medical
care available, we may be able to get the baby up to twelve
weeks." Dr. Klein looked doubtful, but he wanted to give them
some hope. "I want to move her up to intensive care. We have
life support there, so if she becomes unstable, we will be better
able to handle it. It will limit your visiting hours, and I
don't believe CJ will be admitted up there, but the care is the
best available."

"That will be fine." Clark's voice was more certain than his
heart was, though.

***

The next two weeks crawled by. Lois's condition gradually
worsened, and she lapsed into a coma towards the end of the
second week. Lucy came to visit, but Lois didn't even know that
she was there. After a week, Lucy returned to California to care
for her family, leaving Clark with specific instructions to
contact her if there was a change, or if she could do anything to
help. Lois didn't even appear pregnant, and yet the baby had
taken hold of her body completely. When her vital signs began to
fail, Dr. Klein arranged for a Caesarean section to be performed.
Lois was placed on a respirator, and the surgery was performed
with a quick efficiency.

Baby Boy Kent was placed in a gestation tank in the Newborn
Intensive Care Nursery. While just shy of twelve weeks, the
neonatalogist felt that he stood a fair chance at normal
development. He was surrounded by a viscous nutritional fluid,
and his blood was oxygenated through intravenous lines that
entered his umbilical cord. Martha and Jonathan spent hours
sitting with him, partly because they were still not allowed to
see Lois in the ICU downstairs. It was hard to believe that this
two-inch form would ever develop into a child, but as long as
there was any hope at all, the Kents would sit here with him and
wait.

Lois's condition did not immediately improve, as Dr. Klein had
anticipated that it would. While the agent that had poisoned her
blood was gone, her system had been severely depleted in the
process. Her brain waves remained stable, but her body was still
in a shut-down mode. Lois remained on the respirator, and she was
fed through an arterial line into her neck. This line made it
possible to give her nutrition as well as fluids, and it also
allowed physicians to draw blood without continuing to make her a
pincushion. It also permitted the nurses to remove the IV lines
from her arms and hands, and Clark was once again able to hold
his wife's hand and dress her in nightgowns that had sleeves.

At first, Clark remained with his wife at all times. He left her
side briefly to attempt to locate the Lanes, but returned when
they were not immediately accessable. He felt that his place was
with Lois, not searching the globe. He refused to see the baby,
feeling that Lois needed him more than the new child. Martha and
Jonathan did their best to understand Clark's fear and anger,
and they became the baby's "parents" to the nursing staff.
They were allotted all the privileges due to parents, including
unlimited visiting hours and training in the care of the tiny
child. For all of the Kents, days ran together into weeks, and
nights blended with days into a seamless hospital experience that
lost all relation to reality.

As time progressed, Clark had to spend time away from the
hospital. He had not had the benefit of taking shifts, as his
parents had, and the fatigue was causing him to lose his grip on
reality. Superman had ceased to exist as Clark slowly drowned in
a well of pain and fear. He made an effort to be with CJ on
occasion, assisting with homework and even working with him on
his truck. He found some comfort in sharing his fears with CJ,
but he was cautious not to frighten the boy any more than he
already was. Clark went back to work during the day, and went
straight to the hospital when he was done. While he had assumed
most of Lois's editorial responsibilities during the pregnancy,
he deferred most of the decisions now to her two editorial
assistants, and allowed them to take top billing in the credit
section of the Daily Planet.

Lois's condition remained stable, yet failed to improve. She was
taken off the respirator when she seemed ready, and continued to
maintain normal breathing on her own. Her heartbeat was strong,
and her brain activity normal, and yet she remained unconscious.
Clark spent hours at her bedside, both talking to her and caring
for her physical needs. Each morning, he entered her room and
bathed his wife. He massaged lotion into her skin to repel
dryness and increase her circulation, then dressed her in one of
his large flannel shirts for warmth. When the nurses were ready,
he lifted Lois into his arms so they could change her bedding,
then he arranged her as comfortably as possible. He washed and
brushed her hair regularly, and kept it braided so that it would
not be in her face. The nurses were amazed with his willingness
to care for each of her daily needs, but they allowed him to do
as much as possible and tried to give him some privacy with his
wife.

Meanwhile, Baby Boy Kent continued to grow. Nine weeks after his
birth, he was transferred into a standard incubator. He was
finally able to breathe air instead of fluid, and Martha and
Jonathan were permitted to hold the baby. He fit easily onto
Jonathan's hand, and measured about ten inches in length. His
brain and lung development, the primary concerns of
neonatalogists, had progressed beautifully. Martha suggested that
his incubator be placed as close as possible to the large window
of the unit, and the baby responded well to the additional
sunlight. His growth rate increased, and within a few more days
he began sucking a dextrose solution from a tiny bottle with a
preemie nipple. Martha loved to feed him, and she spent all of
her free time holding the tiny baby and giving him the
skin-to-skin contact that the nurses said was so important. Her
only regret was that she could not convince Clark to come see the
baby. His heart was still with Lois, and he seemed to have no
time for anyone else except for CJ.

Clark was doing his best to handle life with Lois in the
hospital, and Martha knew that everything possible was being done
for the two fragile Kents, but Clark was changing. He was easily
startled, and he seemed to be weaker than he had been. He was not
sleeping at night, and Martha was rarely able to get him to eat.
Even with CJ to care for, losing Lois was tearing Clark apart. If
he couldn't have Lois back, she seriously wondered if her son
would maintain the will to live. Only time would answer her
questions, and time was dragging in a way she had never known.

***

Chapter 11

It had been four months since the baby's birth when Lois opened
her eyes. Her brain activity indicated responses to sound and
sight, but she did not react to it. Clark was the first to notice
the big brown eyes of his wife begin to follow him. When he moved
across the room, her head would vaguely move to follow his
movement, and her eyes began to fixate on him. The link appeared
to only be with Clark, as she did not react when other people
entered her room. Clark continued to care for as many of her
needs as possible, and the nurses were relieved to have one less
patient to bathe and turn.

Nearly a month later, Lois left the ICU for a step-down unit on
another floor. Dr. Klein continued his daily visits, although
there was rarely any change in her condition. Dr. Klein feared
that Lois had experienced brain damage as a result of the
continued exposure to the pregnancy, and he felt responsible
because he had both initiated the pregnancy and allowed it to
continue against his better judgment. He was unable to look Clark
in the eye, and he sensed a subdued rage when he was in the other
man's presence.

Once Lois was moved to the new floor, she was allowed to have
visitors. CJ was able to visit his mother, and he was finally
able to feel a part of a family again. He brought copies of the
Daily Planet and read the stories to her, one by one. Lois began
to respond to more of her visitors, and especially to CJ. She
vaguely imitated a smile, and followed him consistently with her
eyes. Even the other physicians and the nursing staff remarked
about her improvement. She was not talking, or caring for
herself, but just the fact that she appeared aware of her
surroundings was encouragement to those around her. Martha and
Jonathan brought her pictures of the baby and, while Clark
refused to look at them, Lois stared at them for hours.

The Metropolis General Hospital became a member of the Kent
family. They lived there, slept there, and their lives revolved
around its schedule. Clark was there first thing in the morning
and last thing each night. More than once, he slept next to Lois
on the tiny hospital bed, his arms wrapped around her still form.
The nurses knew that this happened, just as they knew it was
against all the rules, but the only acknowledgment it ever
received was when an extra blanket was left for him, or a
reminder given to put Lois's rail up so he would not fall. Even
the staff realized that something special was going on in the
room, and they were loath to disturb it.

***

"Can I go with you to the hospital today?" Kat asked as she sat
down on CJ's bed. She had dropped by for a ride to school, and
he was almost ready.

"Sure. I wanted to take Mom my new column. I finally got the
farm piece edited, and I think she'll like it." CJ finished
buttoning his flannel shirt, and turned around to tuck it into
his pants.

"What time did you want to leave?" Kat swallowed heavily and
looked anywhere except at her friend. Friends were *not* supposed
to feel like this about friends.

CJ thought about it for a moment. "Let's leave around four. Dad
wants me to pick up some chow mein for Mom. The doctor said
she's ready for solid foods, and Dad doesn't want her starting
with that nasty hospital stuff."

"Leave it to your dad to think of everything," Kat commented.

"Yeah, I guess." CJ didn't sound so sure. "I just wish,
sometimes, he thought about someone besides Mom."

"You know she needs him now."

"I know. Forget I said that. We need to get to school."

"CJ, talk to me," Kat pleaded. CJ had been quieter this week
than he had since his brother's birth. She knew he was worried
about his mom, and even his brother for that matter, but this
felt different.

"I'd rather not."

"CJ!"

With a sigh, CJ gave in to the inevitable. "Sometimes, I just
wonder why I'm even here. I feel like I'm just in the way. They
give me these little jobs to keep me busy, but it's not like
they really want me here." CJ sat on the bed with a miserable
look on his face. "I just want stuff to be like it used to. I'm
sick of living in that place, or living here alone. Even my
grandparents spend most of their time with the baby, and they
don't care about me now." CJ quietly began to cry.

Kat was immediately by his side, with her arms around him. She
hugged him as the small cries turned into wracking sobs, and
cried with him when he began to shake. She was vaguely aware that
he was hurting her with his grip, but she didn't feel it was a
good time to mention it. After a while, CJ loosened his grip on
her and relaxed somewhat.

"Sorry about that," CJ mumbled as he wiped his face on his
sleeve.

"That's what friends are for," she replied as she wiped her
face in a similar manner. They looked at each other briefly
before breaking down into a laugh.

"We're pretty pitiful," CJ commented.

"Oh, well," Kat smiled. She sobered quickly and her eyes met
CJ's. "You know your dad loves you. He'd do anything for you.
He's just really having a hard time with this."

"I know. Sometimes, it feels like I'm losing both of them, and
I'm sort of afraid of being left all alone."

You'll never be alone, CJ. You'll always have me."

CJ smiled and kissed Kat on the cheek in thanks. Then he took her
hand in his and reached for their backpacks with his other hand.
If they didn't leave now, they'd be late for school.

***

Baby Boy Kent was moved into a regular baby isolette on the first
Tuesday in May. He was no longer in need of oxygen, and he was
eating more than two ounces of formula every two hours. Martha
nagged the baby's doctor incessantly until he consented to allow
the baby off the floor. With her husband and a nosy nurse
following behind, Martha pushed the isolette to the elevator,
went down three floors, then pushed the baby out of the elevator
towards Lois's room. Martha had a bottle tucked in her pocket
and was intent on allowing Lois the privilege of feeding her own
son.

When Martha saw Lois sitting up in bed, she smiled. She rolled
the baby into the room and right up to Lois's bed. Her attention
was so focused on Lois that she did not see her son begin backing
away from the bed with an alarming speed.

"I've brought someone to see his mommy," Martha told her. She
picked up the tiny infant, now just over four and a half pounds,
and placed him on the bed next to his mother.

Lois focused on the tiny infant and smiled. She wished she had
the strength to hold him, but she couldn't lift her hand. She
wanted to tell them how beautiful she thought he was, but her
voice wouldn't make any sound. She stared at the beautiful child
for several moments before she became so frustrated with her
limitations that she began to cry. Martha, seeing Lois's tears,
smiled at her daughter-in-law. She took the bottle from her
pocket and placed it in Lois's hand. Holding her own hand around
Lois's, she helped Lois guide the nipple into the baby's open
mouth.

The little boy latched on to the food source immediately and,
within a few minutes, had drained the bottle dry. Lois watched
the boy eat with fascination, grateful that Martha had understood
her need to be with the baby.

Martha lifted the child into her arms, and patted gently until a
large burp was heard. Then she sat next to Lois on the bed and
laid the baby carefully into the crook of Lois's arm, supporting
it with her hand. Lois smiled down at her son, then focused on
her mother in law. Her lips moved to form the words "thank
you", but no sound came out.

Martha had been watching. "You're welcome."

Lois smiled once more at her mother-in-law before closing her
eyes and drifting off to sleep. When Martha took the baby back
into her arms and placed the baby in the isolette, she was
surprised to see that Clark and Jonathan had disappeared and the
nurse that had followed her was wiping suspiciously moist eyes on
a tissue.

***

Jonathan had found Clark downstairs in the hospital cafeteria. He
alone had noticed his son's hasty departure, and was concerned
that he was quite upset. Clark was getting a candy bar from a
rather uncooperative vending machine when he lost control of his
temper. When the candy caught behind the spiral dispensing arm,
Clark brought his hand down on the machine with a frustrated
sigh. Unfortunately, the material that the machine was made of
was not designed to tolerate such abuse. The aluminum crumpled
beneath his strength, and would be quite useless to others in the
future.

Jonathan could see that Clark was at the end of his frustration
threshold, and suggested a walk outside. Reluctantly, Clark
followed his father into the May sunshine. It was a rare clear
day, that seemed filled with such possibility. Clark was
momentarily stunned that the world was going on outside the
hospital. His life had been reduced to the enormous cement
structure standing behind him, and the metal and glass structure
of the Daily Planet Newsroom. He saw little in between, whether
flying or driving, and occasionally he began to feel that the
world had ceased to exist.

"Do you want to talk about it, son?"

Clark glanced back at this father and sighed. He really should
talk to someone, but he had no clue how to put his feelings into
words. It seemed impossible that anyone could understand the pain
that he felt each time he looked at his wife and could feel that
she was reaching for him but not able to get there. It was so
frustrating to look into those brown eyes that he loved and not
be able to communicate on any level more complex than awareness.
It was tearing him apart to feel as if touching his wife, his
privilege and joy in the past, was being observed beneath a
microscope.

"I guess I'm just tired," he finally answered. That didn't
begin to address his pain, but it was all that he thought he
could share.

"Is there a reason you don't want to see your son?" Jonathan
addressed his primary area of concern. He had watched Clark avoid
the baby for months, usually under the pretense of caring for
Lois, but he had never seen him actively turn his back on the
child. He was becoming concerned that this ran more deeply than a
matter of not having time for the infant, and might even border
on disliking the tiny person.

Clark leaned his back against a tree. They had walked to a small
park that was located a block or so from the hospital. He could
see children on swings and playing in a sandbox, boys chasing
balls and Frisbees with their fathers, and various families
taking advantage of the unusually pretty day. He wanted to feel a
part of that. He remembered sharing similar activities with Lois
and CJ in years past, and he longed for the feeling that he had
lost. He just wanted to go back to the way things had been
before. He wanted to take back the pregnancy and the illness that
had followed. He wanted his wife back.

"I guess it's not really the baby," he finally told his
father. "I feel like I've lost Lois, and I just can't seem to
care about the baby. I know how much we wanted him, but it
doesn't feel right without Lois." Clark sighed. He knew his
father couldn't understand. Jonathan had always loved Clark
unconditionally, and it seemed unlikely that he had ever had
doubts. Clark felt like a traitor. If he loved the baby, he was
loving the one thing that had cost him his wife. If he hated the
baby, he was betraying what Lois had wanted the most. He had
stayed between the two extremes by ignoring the existence of the
child, and this was becoming more difficult to do. The child
wasn't a medical definition any more, as his mother had just
demonstrated. Martha had just forced Clark to see the child as
his son -- as *Lois's* son -- and he wasn't ready to deal with
the implications of this.

"I'm afraid he won't go away if you ignore him," Jonathan
told his own son. It was hurting him to see Clark in such pain,
but denial was not solving the problems. "The baby is nearly
ready to be taken home, and you haven't even given him a name
yet."

Clark looked up in alarm. His face blanched, and he appeared near
panic. Jonathan observed Clark sweating, a sure sign of panic,
and reached out to steady his son. Clark was breathing rapidly,
and thinking as quickly as he could.

"You and Mom can take him, right? You can take care of him for
us, until Lois is better." The look of fear in Clark's eyes
nearly broke Jonathan's heart. He had known the question would
come, just as he knew the answer. "I just can't take him home.
How could I take care of Lois and him at the same time? I just
can't do it."

"Son," Jonathan began, "I wish we could." He sighed and
walked around the tree to lean against it, next to his son.
"Your mother and I have raised our family. Martha turns
seventy-five next month. I can't ask her to start over. It
isn't fair to her, and it wouldn't be fair to the baby. Just
the few hours she spends here during the day tire her so much."

Clark sighed as well. His father was right, and he knew it. The
baby was his responsibility, and there was no way around it. He
also knew that his father was being kind with his explanation. He
had noticed how tired his mother had been looking. The older
Kents had moved into the house in Claremont, and had been
commuting here daily to see the baby and Lois. They had placed
the farm up for sale, and were planning to move into an apartment
closer to Metropolis to help with raising CJ and caring for the
baby. He knew that this situation wasn't the only reason for the
move. Martha had been having trouble with arthritis for the past
few years, and Jonathan was just now realizing how much he had
relied on Clark to get his work done on the farm.

It had not been a fabrication, telling CJ that he was needed on
the farm. There was too much work for the older man to do alone,
and there was no reason to deny it any longer. In truth, Jonathan
had looked into selling the farm long before this medical crisis
had necessitated the move into Clark's house, but the final
decision had not been necessary until Clark had asked for help in
caring for CJ.

Martha had enjoyed getting to know her grandson. Both of them,
for that matter. She had spent hours talking with CJ about his
concerns regarding his mother and the new baby. She had taught
him a little more about cooking, and had helped him with his
homework just as she used to do for Clark. She spent hours caring
for the newest Kent while CJ was in school, feeding and diapering
the little one, and holding him for hours on end. The experience
had not been all bad, but she was tiring. She was sleeping longer
at night, and beginning to feel less herself. She had shared her
concerns with Jonathan when they realized that Clark was not even
attempting to bond with the baby, and Jonathan needed to relay
the concerns to Clark.

Jonathan would do anything for Clark, but he could not commit to
raising a child for him. He had hoped that Clark would start to
show an interest in the baby when Lois had begun to improve but,
if anything, he had withdrawn from the child more. His care of CJ
had not suffered -- in fact, he had seemed to grow continually
closer to the teenager as the crisis enveloped their lives, but
he would not acknowledge his newest son. Jonathan understood his
fear, but he didn't know what to do about it.

"The nurses say the baby can go home within the next few weeks.
You will need to make a decision, son." Jonathan knew that Clark
would not face the choices without some prodding.

"What decision? Can't the baby stay here until Lois is well
enough to care for him?" Clark had never allowed himself to
consider that Lois might *not* recover. They had always planned
to raise the child together, and he had not dealt with any other
options. Lois was strong, she was feisty, and she *would* get
better. From the moment that she had come off the respirator,
Clark had believed this, and he would not listen to the doctors'
opinions to the contrary.

Jonathan knew that his son was not dealing with the facts, but he
didn't know how to force him to do so. "Son, we don't know
when Lois will be able to come home. She may be here for some
time and, even when she does come home, she won't be able to
take care of a baby right away. This is something she can't do
for you."

Clark looked at his father sharply, ready to argue, but having no
grounds to do so. Just because his father had a better grasp of
reality, that was no reason to attack him. Clark took a deep
breath and attempted to face a world without Lois in it. He
contemplated the concept for several moments, then decided once
more that it simply couldn't happen. He needed her too much. "I
can't live without her, Dad."

Jonathan placed his arms around his son, as Clark began to cry.
Tears too long denied flowed down his face for several moments,
and he was too shaken to stop them. His father held him tightly,
just as he had done for CJ, and waited for the storm to pass so
that he could continue with what had to be said. When Clark had
calmed somewhat, Jonathan offered him a handkerchief, which Clark
took gratefully.

"I can't raise him alone, and you can't help. Lois isn't up
to it now, and she may never be." Clark's voice was desolate as
he recited the facts as he saw them. "We can't put him up for
adoption; he's *my* son. Eventually, he'll be like CJ, and
there are powers that would have to be explained. I don't want
him winding up being dissected because I'm not capable of
raising him." Clark turned to his father with a hopeless
expression on his face, his eyes tortured. "Do you have any
ideas?"

"Not at the moment, son," Jonathan told him. "We'll figure
this out together. I just wanted to make sure you were thinking
about it. It's something we need to settle."

Clark knew his father was right, just as he knew that he had a
little time to make the decisions that would affect the rest of
his life. At least the issues were out in the open. Where they
would go from here, Clark had no clue, but at least he had a
starting point.

***

Chapter 12

As CJ entered the room, Lois roused herself from the half-sleep
that had followed her moments with the baby. She had been so
pleased to see the tiny child. Somehow, it made it all worth it
to realize that the fear and frustration had resulted in such a
perfect person.

CJ leaned down and kissed her on the forehead before making
himself comfortable in the large chair that sat beside her bed.
As usual, he pulled out today's copy of the Daily Planet, and
began to read it to her. Column by column, she was able to catch
up on what was happening in the world she remembered. It all
seemed so far away, hidden from her. She could remember being a
part of it, and she could feel that she belonged there now, but
it felt as if she were surrounded by cotton. Every image was
dulled, every feeling muted. She felt isolated from the rest of
the world, and she had no idea how to bridge the gap.

Regardless of this feeling of separation, she clung to each of
her son's words. As he read, she became aware of a second
presence in the room. She turned her head to see Kat moving into
the room, with an odd look on her face. Kat moved close to CJ and
sat next to him, sharing the large chair. Lois nearly smiled as
she thought of how she and Clark used to do similar things. She
missed cuddling with Clark. Often, he stayed for hours with her,
but they rarely touched unless he was saying hello or goodbye, or
when he was tending to her needs.

Kat listened with Lois and was struck by how hollow Lois looked.
Kat had rarely been to the hospital, and then she never went into
Lois's room. Today, however, CJ had seemed so shaken that she
didn't want him to do this alone. Every day, CJ came to read to
his mother after school, and every day he came home quiet and
withdrawn. Today, Kat had made a quick trip upstairs to see the
baby, then she had decided to join CJ in his time with his
mother. Lois appeared to be paying attention to the reading, but
she still looked so far away. Kat wasn't sure what she could do,
but she could see from his expression that CJ was worried as
well.

Cautiously, Kat slipped from CJ's side and moved closer to Lois.
She saw the brown eyes following her, and realized then that Lois
had not taken her eyes from her since she had entered the room.
Carefully, Kat eased herself onto the bed next to Lois, and took
the older woman's hand in hers. Lois squeezed the connection to
life tightly, and then released it slightly as her strength
diminished. Kat understood the non-verbal signal, and continued
to hold Lois's hand. She had missed time with this woman who had
acted as her mother for so many years. She hoped that Lois felt
the same way.

Lois reveled in the feeling of connection that the contact
brought her. She felt so lost in this bed, all alone, and
everyone treated her as if she were fragile. She knew that she
had been ill, but she needed her family now. She couldn't find
the words to tell them, and when she thought of them, they
slipped away once more. How could she make them understand that
she needed to be with them? She squeezed Kat's hand once more,
gently this time, and held on as her son's words flowed over
her. She listened to most of the paper at this sitting, without
the usual grogginess that she had been experiencing. It felt good
to feel a connection.

As CJ was finishing his reading, she began to feel really tired.
Her eyes drooped, and she clung tighter to Kat's hand in hopes
that she could delay the inevitable. Kat saw Lois's struggle,
and quickly spoke to reassure her. "We'll be back tomorrow,
Mrs. Kent. I promise we'll be back so you won't have to be here
all alone. It's okay for you to sleep now."

CJ marveled at how calm Kat sounded, how she seemed to know just
what his mom needed to hear. Lois released Kat's hand, and
allowed herself to sleep.

"I think she was afraid we were going to leave," CJ commented
to his friend.

"I think so, too. She seemed to like having me here. Maybe you
should sit next to her when you read?"

"Maybe," CJ thought aloud. "I bet she does get lonely here.
You know," he mused, "I don't think Dad holds her hand very
much, either. He usually sits where I do. Maybe I should tell him
how much she seemed to like this."

"Good idea, CJ. It's getting late. We need to head back home
now." Kat was reluctant to leave the sleeping Lois, but they had
been there for hours, and she did have school the next day.

"Okay. I need to check upstairs to see the baby, then we can
go."

Together, CJ and Kat went up to see the infant. CJ declined
holding his brother, and instead left that task to his
grandmother. Martha smiled her understanding, and went back to
rocking the baby as the two teenagers headed to the truck.

***

Clark eased into Lois's room just after dark. He had seen CJ
getting in his truck with Kat, down in the parking area, and he
realized that Lois would be alone. He needed to talk to her. For
nearly two decades, she had been his best friend. He needed to
use her as a sounding board for his confused thoughts and
emotions, even if she couldn't provide any feedback.

She had been asleep when he entered but, as he seated himself on
the edge of her bed, she opened her eyes and smiled faintly. She
knew him, and that was some relief. She had not yet responded
verbally, but she was showing a definite awareness of her
surroundings.

"Hey, sweetheart," he said, leaning down to kiss her on her
forehead. He wanted to linger, to hold and caress her, but he
knew that there were cameras that reflected each motion she made
to the nursing station down the hall. What he really wanted was
some privacy. He slipped his arms beneath her, and lifted her up
onto his lap. Her body was mostly slack, but she had more
strength now than she had possessed even a week ago. He
positioned her head on his shoulder, so she appeared comfortable,
and relaxed onto her bed. Her hands moved faintly where they
rested against his chest, as though seeking contact, and he held
them against him as he spoke into her ear.

"I've wanted to hold you for so long. I missed you," he told
her, placing a kiss on her cheek. "I wish I knew what you
wanted. I wish I knew what you were thinking. I need you, now,
and I feel like you're so far away from me." Clark rubbed his
hand up and down her back. He could feel every rib along her
sides, and her spine was so prominent. She had lost so much
weight that she appeared to be only a shadow. "I've got some
decisions to make," he continued. "They affect us both, and you
need to be involved, but I have no idea how to know what you
want." Clark sighed and held her a little tighter, feeling the
need to share his thoughts with her.

"Dad says I'll have to make a decision about the baby. He
can't stay here indefinitely, and I have no clue what to do."
He looked down into Lois's face, and was stunned to see a tear
in her eye. He lightly brushed away the drop, and replaced it
with a soft kiss. "I know you wanted him so much, but I have no
clue how I can take care of him. It isn't like when we got CJ. I
don't have you there to help, and my parents are getting too old
for this. Lucy has a family of her own, so I don't really want
to hit her with this. I don't know how to do this."

Looking down at Lois once more, Clark could sense that she was
listening. Not just hearing, but really listening to all that he
said. He felt better sharing his fears with her, so he decided to
tackle the big stuff as well. "I haven't held him," he
admitted. "I thought about it, but every time I look at him, all
I feel is anger. I know I can't blame him for what happened --
he was the result of the decision, not the cause -- but it's how
I feel. Every time I see him, I think that if he weren't here,
you would be back at home and we could forget about all of this.
I've lived without you for half a year, and it feels like a
lifetime. I just want you back."

Clark relaxed against the raised head of the bed, and cradled his
wife in his arms. "I can't live without you, Lois. I don't
know how, and I don't want to learn." Clark closed his eyes,
and sighed at the feel of his wife in his arms. He was only going
to rest a moment, he told himself. Just a moment, then he would
lay her down and go home to CJ.

Several moments later, a very observant nurse carried a blanket
in to the sleeping couple. She quietly raised the rail behind
Clark's back, then covered them both with the blanket. She
smiled slightly as she closed the door to the room behind her. It
was strange, she thought, that other nurses complained about
patient families. She walked back into the nurses station and
touched the "off" button for the monitor to room eight. She was
quite certain that, if she was needed, the man would call her.
Meanwhile, they were married, and certainly didn't need her to
watch over them. With her mission accomplished, she sat down at
the desk and began her documentation in one of her patients'
charts.

***

It was two in the morning when Clark woke. He glanced down at his
sleeping wife, then gently lowered her into her bed. He watched
her briefly before deciding that she would indeed continue
sleeping, and leaving the room.

He needed to get home. He was certain that his parents were with
CJ, but it was still his responsibility to be there. He stepped
into the elevator, and really intended to go down to the parking
levels, but instead he pressed the button for his son's floor.
His son... that didn't even *sound* right. He stepped off the
floor and walked to the windows that shielded the babies from
drafts. He watched the hustle and bustle for a moment before he
felt a soft touch on his shoulder.

"Can I help you, sir?" The nurse was young, and her voice was
soft.

"Maybe. I haven't been here before. My son is here; the name is
Kent." He felt odd making the admission, but he had to start
somewhere.

The nurse smiled. She had been told that the baby's father had
not yet come to see him because his wife was ill. She found it
odd but, as the child had such dedicated grandparents, she
hadn't given it much thought. It was not uncommon for babies to
be abandoned when they were so ill, especially by young parents.
What surprised her was that this man was so old. Most of the
parents who had such tiny children were children themselves, in
her experience, and she was pleased to see this father now taking
interest. "Let me show you where to dress and scrub, and then
I'll show you your son."

Clark hesitated briefly, then let himself be led to a large sink.
He followed the nurses instructions and removed his watch, then
held down a foot lever to dispense some water. He used the little
brown scrubber sponge to lather his hands and arms up to the
elbow, and continued to scrub for the required five minutes. Once
he had rinsed the foul-smelling lather from himself, he dried
with the towel she handed him and allowed her to help him into a
blue paper gown.

She escorted him into a nursery that consisted of tiny babies and
enormous machinery. He finally saw his son lying on a table with
shallow raised sides, and what appeared to be a sun lamp over
him. He was tiny, lying on his stomach with his diapered rump
sticking up in the air. Clark felt a familiar and unwelcome surge
of anger that this tiny person had caused his wife so much harm,
but he was able to quell it for the moment. The nurse offered to
allow Clark to hold the baby, but he declined. He chose instead
to stand there, just watching the baby sleep.

So this was the person whose fate was held in his hands. This was
the child who must be cared for. He wondered what Lois would want
him to do. Would she want him to hire a nanny and keep the baby
at home? Should he demand that the baby be kept here even when it
was well enough to live at home? Should he expect CJ to help
raise the child, or do it himself?

Seeing the baby made the situation more real, and more important.
He would have to figure out what to do, and soon. With a sigh, he
left the newborn nursery and walked back to the little room where
he could dispose of his paper gown. He then went back to the
elevator and headed down to the parking garage. He would have to
be at work in a few hours, and he needed a shower. There was so
much to be done.

***

Clark entered Lois's room early the next afternoon following
work. It had been a quiet day at the Planet, and he was relieved
not to have to bring work here with him. After kissing her hello,
he walked into the small bathroom and placed a towel on the
bottom of the tub. He ran water into it, making sure that it
wasn't too hot, and arranged Lois's shampoo and soap on the
floor next to the tub.

Once the tub contained about six inches of water, he went to get
Lois. He made sure that her catheter bag was attached to the IV
pole before lifting Lois into his arms and maneuvering the pole
before him with the arm he used to support her knees. When he had
her in the little bathroom, he stood her on her feet, carefully
supporting her weight with one arm while unbuttoning the shirt
she wore with the other hand. He carefully placed her in the tub,
seated on the towel, and continued supporting her with his left
arm. He used his right arm to wash her body, and use a cup to wet
her hair.

He was quite skilled at bathing his wife. He knew just how to
position her so that the catheter wasn't pulled and the IV into
her neck didn't become wet. He washed her hair efficiently, as
he did every other day, and cleaned her with her favorite shower
gel. Once she was clean, he wrapped a towel around her hair and
another around her body before lifting her from the tub. He took
another of his flannel shirts from a hook behind the door, and
slipped it over her shoulders.

Clark managed to get her back into bed, the shirt buttoned and
the towel removed without exposing her body to the cameras that
monitored both the main room and the bath room. It seemed a small
thing, but he wanted to protect her modesty just as she would if
she were able. When he had her in bed beneath the covers, he
dried her hair with the towel and carefully combed the tangles
from its length. Her hair had grown past her shoulders and was
quite easy to braid, so he combed it over her right shoulder and
quickly braided it to keep it out of her way. He wondered if she
would want it cut, but he didn't want to make the decision for
her. All he really could manage was to keep it tended until she
was able to make the decision for herself.

Clark reached into her bedside table and grabbed a bottle of her
favorite lotion. He used it as he rubbed her arms and legs, back
and chest beneath the shirt. He needed to keep her circulation
stimulated, and prevent the bedsores that were so common with
extended hospitalizations. Also, he completed her physical
therapy as the technicians had trained him to do. He carefully
moved her body through a full range of motion: arms, legs,
fingers, toes, hips, and neck. It was important to keep her
muscles familiar with movement so that she would be able to
recover her strength more quickly when she was able.

Clark had the procedure for Lois's daily needs down to a
routine. He accomplished the task in just over an hour, and it
allowed him time to relay the events and frustrations of the day
to his wife. He was careful to be finished before normal visiting
hours began, that way she always looked her best when others came
to see her.

Just as Clark was finishing his task, and reaching for the pasta
he had brought for her dinner, Lois moved. She deliberately
raised her arm, and rested it against his cheek for a fraction of
a moment before it fell back to the bed. When Clark met her eyes,
he saw unshed tears there, most likely from frustration at her
own weakness. Gently, he lifted her hand back to his cheek, and
held it there for several minutes. Lois's eyes were grateful, as
he assisted her in doing what she most wanted to do. Her lips
formed the words "I love you," and Clark saw it. He bent down
and kissed her, lingering for longer than he normally did. He
felt her respond slightly, although certainly not like she would
normally do, and a feeling of unbridled hope speared through him.
He pulled back for a moment to look at his wife, and saw a faint
smile on her face.

For the first time, Clark really felt like everything would be
okay. He pulled Lois into his arms, feeling her still-damp hair
against his shoulder. He held her for several minutes, just
enjoying the feeling of her in his arms, then released her to
deal with practical matters.

Reaching to the table behind him, he picked up the container of
angel hair pasta that he had purchased at her favorite Italian
restaurant. He used a fork to twirl single strands of the pasta,
and lifted them gently to her lips. Lois took tiny bites of the
meal, chewing carefully, and swallowing with some difficulty. She
was grateful that Clark brought her meals, and hopeful that she
would soon be able to eat enough to get the horrible needle out
of her neck. She forced herself to take several more bites even
after she was full, then she slowly turned her head away. Clark
understood her signal, and placed the remainder of her meal back
on the table. She had eaten more than usual tonight, and he was
pleased.

Clark reached into the pocket of his shirt, and withdrew a small
foil-wrapped candy. The chocolate was slightly melted, so it
would require little effort on her part, and he knew it was her
favorite. He unwrapped the little kiss, and bit a tiny piece off
it to place between her lips. Lois devoured the candy, allowing
it to melt on her tongue and enjoying the sweet flavor. Clark
repeated the process until the candy was eaten, then licked the
remaining chocolate off his fingers.

"Thank you," a tiny voice said. Clark's head snapped up in
shock at the familiar sound of his wife's voice. It was faint,
barely a whisper of sound, but it was her voice. When he met her
eyes, he saw the glimmer there of so many words unspoken. He
reached for her and held her in his arms.

Lois cuddled into Clark's embrace. She knew he would think that
the "thank you" was for the chocolate, and that wasn't really
what she had meant. She would explain it all to him later, she
thought, when she was feeling stronger. For now, the bath and
massage had relaxed her, and eating always tired her, so she
rested her head on her husband's strong shoulder and drifted off
to sleep.

***

Chapter 13

Lois was getting better. Clark finally was able to believe things
were going to be okay. Of course, she was not getting better
terribly quickly. Even though each day brought a new phase of her
recovery into view, she had such a long way to go that it would
be quite some time before she was her normal self.

The baby, on the other hand, was ready to go home. As Clark had
feared, the doctors were no longer willing to allow a healthy
child to remain in the newborn nursery. He was eating normal
amounts, taking no medications, and in general was as normal as
if he had been born right on time.

Against all his arguments, Clark was faced with a choice: he
could take the baby home, or he could relinquish him to foster
care. Although Clark certainly advocated adoption, this was not a
possibility for their baby. He was normal enough now, but CJ's
abilities proved that the Kryptonian heritage was a dominant one,
and the baby would most likely grow to be like his brother.

The decision was finally made that the baby would have to come
home. Clark wasn't sure how he would deal with caring for both
an infant and the daily needs of his wife who was still in the
hospital, but he had accomplished super-feats before, and he
assumed that he would have to again.

Martha found her son up in the attic, searching through CJ's old
baby things. He was looking for a crib, but he had not been able
to find it. Currently, he was sitting and staring at the old
bassinet that his parents had sent before they had found CJ. It
was slightly yellowed, but it was still usable. He knew that
there was a set of sheets and a fancy cover somewhere in one of
the boxes, but he had no clue which one, and it took time to
x-ray each box, layer by layer, to find the appropriate cloth.

"What's wrong, Clark?" Martha hadn't taken much time to quiz
her son on his unusual behavior of late. She knew that Lois's
illness had been hard on him, and she suspected that he still
held some resentment towards the baby. Jonathan had said that
Clark was uncomfortable with the child, but hadn't gone beyond
that. She needed to know just what was going on with her son
before they brought a helpless infant into the situation.

Clark sighed, lowering his eyes. "It's just so different,
Mom."

"What's different?"

He held up a little overall outfit that CJ had worn many years
ago. "It doesn't feel like this baby belongs with us," he
said. "I know he's ours, but I felt more attachment to CJ the
first time that I saw him then I feel towards a baby that has
been here for nearly a year."

Martha had been treating Clark gently since this ordeal had
begun. She vividly remembered his voice when he had told her that
Lois was ill. She remembered the devastation in his face when she
had first seen him in the hospital. He had seemed so lost, so
afraid and alone. She had followed her instincts since then,
coddling him as any mother would do. She hadn't pressed him on
the issue of his son because she didn't feel that he was ready
for it. She had hoped that, once Lois had begun to improve, he
would start to accept some responsibility for the child, but this
hadn't been the case. If anything, he seemed to be withdrawing
even further from his baby.

Clark always managed to be conspicuously absent when the baby was
taken to Lois's room, although that was virtually the only time
he wasn't by her side. He refused to go up and see the baby, and
wouldn't even give the poor child a name. She was beginning to
wonder if she needed to be a little more stern with her son.
After all, a mother's love gave a child what it needed, not what
it wanted, and he needed for her to put him in his place. At
least, she *hoped* that was what he needed...

"Well, I must say that you were a lot more excited about CJ than
you have been about this baby," Martha began. "And you
certainly spent more time with CJ."

Clark continued to fail to meet his mother's eyes. He knew that
she was right. He hadn't allowed himself to love the baby
because he was still so angry at himself for allowing the
pregnancy in the first place. Granted, he'd had no idea how
things would go so badly wrong, but he still felt responsible for
both putting Lois's life in danger when the pregnancy began, and
allowing her to continue the pregnancy against medical advise. If
he were honest with himself, he would have probably seen that the
decision had been Lois's and not just his, but he wasn't seeing
things quite that clearly. Self-reproach was easier.

"Do you honestly think that you could have changed anything that
happened, Clark?" Martha's voice was quiet as she seated
herself with some difficulty on the floor of the attic next to
her son. "I know you think you can protect the world, but you
can't take the blame for everything."

Clark finally met his mother's eyes, a mixture of pain and
longing clouding the normally soft brown. "I just want her back,
Mom."

Martha hugged her son briefly, then pulled back to look him in
the eye. "And just how do you think your wife will feel when she
realizes that you won't have anything to do with her son?"

Clark hadn't thought of it in quite that way. The baby looked
mostly like him, rather than like Lois, or so he had thought in
the few brief instances that he had looked at the baby at all. He
hadn't really considered the baby as a part of Lois, because her
body so clearly hadn't been able to tolerate it. Maybe he did
need to rethink this. Things seemed so much clearer in his own
home, rather than in the artificial environment of the hospital.
He couldn't wait to get Lois back home, so he could think
clearly all the time.

"So," Martha added as she turned away from her son, "Do you
think you have room for this in your room?" She carefully stood
and inspected the bassinet that Clark had been working with when
she had come in. "He's sure small enough for it now, although
we will have to look for the crib soon."

Clark allowed the change of subject, and went back to preparing
for the baby's arrival. With his mother's help, they found the
cover for the bassinet, several sets of sheets, baby clothes, and
even managed to locate the crib, although they elected not to get
it out just then. Clark was still helping his mother sort through
which clothes were too big for the baby to wear when he heard the
screams.

Children were calling out in fear. He was normally able to block
out cries for help, allowing himself to believe that he had his
own problems to worry about. He hadn't worn the blue suit in
nearly a year and, after the first few weeks, the public had
seemed to forget about him. Now, though, a child was most
specifically calling for Superman, and the terror in her voice
was more than he could ignore.

Martha saw the expression on her son's face, and was relieved to
see it there. He had buried himself beneath pain and fear for too
long, and she was refreshed to see him concerned for someone
else. Perhaps it was because Lois was doing better, or maybe it
was the discussion about responsibility that they had just had,
but, whatever the reason, she was going to encourage it. "Go!"
she told him firmly.

Clark hesitated for only a moment more, then he sped from the
room and down the stairs to his closet. Within seconds, he had
opened the false back to the closet, retrieved the suit and flown
out of the window.

***

He followed the scream to a school bus that was recklessly
veering into oncoming traffic. Quickly, he lifted the bus into
the air and out of the path of danger. The wheels of the bus
continued to spin for several minutes, and Clark finally
maneuvered himself beneath the bus and tore the fuel line from
beneath it. Once the fuel had harmlessly drained to the field
below, the motor sputtered and died, and he rested the bus in the
grass.

A quick check assured him that the children were all shaken, but
appeared to be unharmed. He silently gave a prayer of thanks that
school buses were now required to have seat belts, and that no
students had been thrown around within the bus. The driver of the
bus was quite dead, and Clark spared a brief thought that, if he
had been a little faster, he might have been in time to save him
too, but he was too grateful for the little girl clinging to his
legs to allow himself to grieve.

"Oh, thank you, Superman," the child kept saying. "I'm so
glad you came back." Clark held the little girl tightly,
reassuring her. as well as himself, that he was indeed "back".
He would have to get the bus back to the school, as it was very
much disabled at the moment, and parents would certainly be
worried. He briefly used the bus's radio to let the dispatch
office know what he was planning, then he had the children buckle
themselves back into the bus for the flight back to school.

***

It was later than usual when Clark arrived at the hospital. He
had been caught up in the media rush that had followed
Superman's return, and it had taken him hours to satisfy their
curiosity about his absence and return. Finally, they had allowed
him an opportunity to leave, and he flew straight to his wife's
side.

Lois was just finishing up her lunch tray when Clark arrived. She
was surprised that he was so late on a Saturday, but she realized
that life did go on outside of her world. "You look tired," she
commented, as he greeted her with a kiss on her forehead.

He smiled at her concerned look. "I am tired," he replied. He
took a seat on the edge of her bed and quietly watched her for a
moment. He felt awful that he had forgotten to bring her lunch.
He normally didn't allow her to eat the hospital versions of
food, and instead he brought her favorites from the take-out
restaurants that they had frequented before. In all the chaos of
the morning, it had slipped his mind.

"What's wrong, honey?" Lois hadn't seen him look this upset
in quite some time. He always came to her room with a smile, and
it bothered her that he wasn't sharing what was wrong.

"I forgot your lunch," he mumbled quietly. He didn't meet his
wife's eyes.

"Look," she said firmly, getting his attention. "I know I'm
not up to one hundred percent here, but you can talk to me! I
*want* you to talk to me. You think I can't see that something
is bothering you? I know you better than that, and I know when
you're hiding something -- and you are most definatly hiding
something..."

"Lois!" Clark said, effectively interrupting her babble. He
smiled softly at the reminder that, while his wife might not be
back up to full speed yet, she was still his wife. He placed the
palm of his hand against her cheek, and smiled at her. "Do you
know that I missed you?"

Lois covered his palm with hers, absorbing the love in his eyes.
"Don't think you're going to get out of answering me."

Clark smiled once more, and took a deep breath before starting.
"Superman made his return appearance today," he told her. "It
wasn't planned, but I couldn't just... I had to..." He
couldn't think of a way to explain the feelings he'd had when
he heard the child screaming.

"What happened?" Lois asked, taking his hand in hers and gently
kissing his palm.

He had forgotten how much he relied on her to pull out the things
he didn't want to deal with. While he wasn't thrilled to have
to find words for the emotions, he did know how much she helped
him to get through the confusion that the feelings caused. "I
heard a little girl screaming," he began. "It was a
second-grade class on a field trip. They had to have the trip on
a Saturday because of all the snow that we had over the winter.
They needed the rest of the week for school."

Lois listened carefully. Just the fact that he was muttering
about the inconsequential details of the day, like the mandatory
number of school days in a year and the necessity of moving
extra-curricular activities to the weekend, let her know that he
was avoiding the issue. She considered prompting him, but decided
instead to allow him to continue at his own pace.

After a moment more, he went on, "The paramedics said that the
driver had a heart attack. He probably died instantly. When the
bus started swerving into traffic, the kids started screaming. I
heard this little girl," he continued, tears in his eyes. "God,
she sounded so much like Kat. She was calling for Superman. The
others were just screaming, but she was specifically calling for
Superman." He looked up into Lois's eyes, and saw the
understanding and acceptance there that he relied on.

Clark allowed himself to be pulled into her embrace. She gently
wrapped her arms around him, and just held him. She wondered how
he had gone so long, denying this part of him that needed to
help. It just wasn't in his nature to see things going wrong and
not jump in. She wondered what it had cost him to stay at her
side for so long.

"I'm glad Superman's back," she told him quietly. "What did
you tell the press?"

Clark pulled back slightly and smiled. "Well, I gave the Planet
an exclusive interview," he said with a smile. "I told them
that there had been some problems on New Krypton that required my
attention, and that I had needed to leave without much warning."
He looked up at Lois with a question in his eyes, if not his
voice. "I told them that the situation was still erratic, and I
might need to go back."

Lois shook her head. "I've told you before; the world *needs*
Superman. I won't monopolize your time." As she rested back
against the pillows, she sighed. Just the little effort it had
taken her to eat and hug her husband had left her exhausted. She
wondered how much longer it would be before her body recovered
from the extended inactivity.

"But I need to be here for you." Clark sighed again, allowing
some of his frustration to surface. "I need to be here to bring
you lunch, and listen to you yell about your therapists, and
gripe about the limited visiting hours. My place is with you."

Lois could see his frustration. His sense of duty was one reason
that she loved him so much, but he was tearing himself up trying
to forget about his other responsibilities. Granted, they were
responsibilities of choice, but they were no less real because of
that. "Clark, I'm not upset that you saved some lives today. As
a matter of fact, I think that saving children is definitely more
important than bringing your wife her Spicy Pork." She smiled,
hoping he would see the humor in the situation, but his face
remained serious.

"I *need* to be here for you, Lois. If it weren't for me, you
wouldn't even have to be here." He looked down, unable to meet
her eyes, tears filling his own.

"What are you talking about, Clark? I'm here because I
couldn't tolerate a simple pregnancy, not because of you."

"You could tolerate a *simple* pregnancy; what you couldn't
handle was having *my* baby."

Lois looked at Clark, completely confused for a moment. Surely he
couldn't hold himself responsible for this as well? She had been
the one who insisted on continuing the pregnancy against Dr.
Klein's advice. She had been the one who insisted that they not
give up on trying to have their own child, whatever the risks.
She had been the one who had placed her own life in danger
without realizing that she would be orphaning CJ if things
didn't work out. *She* was fully responsible for the situation,
and she had payed for her arrogance with a year of her life.

"What are you talking about, Clark? This was *my* choice. In
fact, I distinctly remember arguing with both you and Dr. Klein
when he wanted me to take the safe way out."

"But, Lois," he told her, his voice anguished. "It was my
physiology that caused all this. If I had been normal, you never
would have been in danger."

"And if you had been normal," she yelled back, "I would have
died on the space shuttle, or married Lex, or been boiled in oil,
or any of a hundred other things that you saved me from. I
wouldn't be *alive* if it weren't for you!" Exhausted from her
outburst, Lois fell back once more onto the pillows. She reached
out for the bed railing to steady herself as the world began to
spin.

Hearing her small sound of distress, Clark immediately reached
for his wife. He grasped her hand firmly, while reaching for the
call button. Lois halted his motion with her hand over his, then
closed her eyes against the spinning once more. "It's okay,
Clark," she told him. "This happens when I do too much. Between
feeding myself and yelling at you, I just went past my
limitations for a moment."

Clark accepted her explanation, but still held the remote control
call button in his hand. Within a moment or two, Lois's heart
rate slowed to the familiar rhythm of sleep. He sat listening to
her for several more minutes before he was relieved enough to
return the call button to its place next to her pillow. He
reached out his hand, caressing the fragile skin of her cheek,
and tracing the skin down to her neck. She had a small scar where
they had removed the Broviak line that had fed and hydrated her
for so long. It was pink now, and barely an inch long, but to him
it was a constant reminder of how long she had been out of his
reach.

Clark sat for a long time, watching his wife. He would need to go
home and pick up the car. He was supposed to take the baby home
today. Glancing at his watch, he realized that he was late for
that as well. He hated to leave Lois, especially after the
half-argument that they had been having, but he was needed
elsewhere. After kissing her cheek, he removed the two
foil-wrapped candies from his shirt pocket and placed them on the
bedside table next to her nearly empty tray. He had made a habit
of bringing her tidbits of chocolate every day. It was one
tangible way that he could show her his love.

The other way he could show her was to take her baby home. He
really wasn't ready for this. His parents were staying with him
for a while longer to ease the transition, but he had no desire
to take this baby into his home. With CJ, he had always felt an
attachment, a love, that had eased the hard times. He had also
been able to rely on his wife to care for him when he wasn't
able. This was entirely different.

At best, he felt indifference for the baby. He couldn't even
bring himself to name the child. At worst, he felt an irrational
anger at the child for all that he had lost. If he could have
wished the child out of existence, he would have done so. That
surprised him; he had always loved children, all children, even
those that weren't his. Now, he wasn't able to look this child
in the face without anger. He didn't know what to do about it.

He didn't feel like he could talk to Lois about it. He certainly
didn't want to admit his feelings to his own parents. After all,
they had loved him unconditionally when he wasn't even from
their planet, and he couldn't love his own son. It embarrassed
him, and it humiliated him as well. What kind of a man couldn't
stand his own child? What was wrong with him?

With another sigh, and a final glance at his sleeping wife, he
left the room. He stepped into an unused conference room and
quickly spun back into Superman. He flew from the window, and
soon arrived at the grove of trees behind his house. He descended
quickly, and spun back into his jeans and flannel shirt. When he
entered the house, he saw that his mother had been quite busy.
She had laundered the baby clothes and set up the bassinet in the
living room.

Clark found a note inside the bassinet:

Clark,

We've taken the car to pick up

the baby. Please bring CJ's truck

so he can run some errands for

us after we've finished. Love You.

Mom

Clark used his spare keys to unlock CJ's truck. He made the
drive to the hospital in good time, and even found a parking
place relatively close. With a feeling of dread, he met his
mother at the admissions office of the hospital and signed the
paperwork that would allow him to take the baby home.

Once that paperwork was complete, he walked beside his mother to
the elevator, carrying the infant car seat that they would use to
transport his son. As they left the elevator, his mother stepped
in front of him and forced him to stop. Confused, he looked down
into a very determined face.

"Okay," she told him. "I know how hard this has been on you. I
realize that this is the last thing in the world that you want to
do, and that you don't think you're ready. But I also know that
there is a baby in that room that needs your love. He was born of
you and Lois, and I will *not* allow you to ignore my grandchild,
any more than I would have tolerated you ignoring CJ when he was
that age. You *will* be his father, because you *are* his father.
Do we understand one another?"

Clark lowered his head. If he had felt ashamed of himself before,
this made him feel worse. The reprimand from his mother had put
him effectively in his place. With a quiet, "Yes, ma'am," he
followed her to the nursery.

***

Chapter 14

Clark carefully carried the infant car seat into the house. He
set it on the kitchen table, and then put down the large bag of
formula, diapers and instructions that the nurses had given him.
He was still somewhat startled by all that had happened in the
last few hours.

He had arrived in the nursery to see CJ holding his brother, and
carefully feeding him a bottle. After listening to twenty minutes
of instructions from the nurses, CJ had burped the baby and
strapped him carefully into the car seat. The baby wasn't much
bigger than a regular newborn. The truth was, he probably could
have gone home much sooner. Clark had begged the doctors to
extend his stay, and they had done so for as long as they could.
Now the baby needed a home, and that was what he would have.

After Clark had strapped the baby into the car -- a skill he was
still adept at, although he hadn't done it in nearly fifteen
years -- he and Martha had driven home with the baby, allowing CJ
to drive his truck into town to pick up Kat. Now, he found
himself faced with caring for an infant. Martha followed him into
the kitchen and unstrapped the child from its seat. Giving Clark
a look that clearly told him that she didn't approve of his
actions, she carried that baby into the living room while Clark
began unloading the bag of baby things.

When Clark entered the living room a few minutes later, he found
his mother asleep with the baby sleeping on her chest. He
carefully removed the child from his mother's arms and placed
him in the bassinet. He managed to do this without actually
holding the baby (he just quickly transferred him) and looked
back at his mother. She was sound asleep, her head awkwardly
leaning to the side. She hadn't even awakened when he had
removed the baby from her hands. She was far too tired. As his
father had told him, Martha was too old for this. She was
seventy-five years old, and she had been spending too much time
caring for the rest of the family rather than herself.

Clark closed his eyes as he felt another wave of guilt wash over
him. He felt guilt over Lois's illness, CJ's neglect, his
mother's fatigue, and his ambivalence for his own child. His
father had returned to Kansas to sign the final papers selling
the farm, and Clark even felt guilty for that. There was guilt
over Superman's absence, and guilt over his forgetting to do the
grocery shopping this week. Clark was more miserable than he had
ever been in his life, and he had no clue what to do with the
emotions.

Normally, he would use Lois as a sounding board, but she was so
weak that he was afraid to do so. Still, he felt a need to be
with her. He used the phone to call Mrs. Mosby, their next-door
neighbor. She had asked on several occasions if she could do
anything to help, and this was as good a time to call in that
favor as any. She agreed to come right over, and to stay until
either Martha awoke or until CJ made it home.

After her arrival, Clark began to drive into Metropolis. When he
encountered rush hour traffic, he pulled the car into the parking
lot of a truck stop and locked it. Once he had walked into the
trees behind the little diner, he spun into the suit and took off
quickly. He really wanted to be with Lois, not driving back and
forth.

Clark did manage to run by a fast food restaurant and pick up a
value meal for his wife. After signing a few autographs, and
answering several children's questions about how he carried
money in the suit, he began to wish he had taken the time to
change before going into the restaurant.

Clark landed behind the hospital in an alley. After scanning the
area to ensure that he was not being watched, he spun back out of
the suit. Wearing his jeans and T-shirt, with an unbuttoned
flannel shirt covering his arms, Clark entered the hospital
carrying his wife's dinner. He greeted a few nurses on the way
up to Lois's floor, and then entered her room.

He found his wife carefully lowering her water glass back to the
bedside table. Even though the glass was plastic and contained
only a couple of ounces of water, the weight made her arm shake.
With a disgusted sigh, she pushed the table away from herself,
spilling water from the pitcher in the process. With that done,
she finally broke into frustrated tears.

Clark crossed the room quickly, and took Lois into his arms. He
allowed her to cry until she was finished, stroking her hair and
her back and whispering nonsense into her ear. He held her
upright as she sagged into him, too tired to maintain a sitting
position on her own. When she was calm once more, he helped her
to rest against the elevated head of her bed.

"I didn't hear you come in," she told him.

"I was quiet," he replied. "Are you ready to tell me what's
wrong?" Gently, he stoked his fingertips down her arm, and took
her hand in his.

"Nothing," she lied. Then, with a sigh, "Everything." Lois
shook her head. "I'm just tired of being so weak. I want to go
home," she finally said, breaking into tears again.

Clark watched her, and continued to hold her hand. He wanted her
home, too, but he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to care
for her adequately. Superman's return had made a live-in nurse a
difficult proposition, and she still required constant care. He
was fortunate that their medical insurance didn't have a cap,
and he could keep her here as long as she needed to stay, just as
the baby had been covered. Frankly, the only problems he
*wasn't* facing were financial. Emotional, physical, and
spiritual were a mess, but financially they were fine. There was
a certain level of irony in that fact.

Clark considered the situation as Lois pulled his hand to her
chest and cuddled with it as she went to sleep. She often did
this -- held onto him during sleep -- and it seemed to give her
comfort. The bottom line was that he couldn't do everything. He
could care for Lois's needs, but not for her and the baby, and
work, and care adequately for CJ. His parents needed to get back
to their lives. They needed to find an apartment and get settled;
they had spent enough time taking care of him and his family.

He had to work to maintain his insurance. He had used all of his
vacation time, and then some, when Lois had first become ill. She
received a monthly disability check, but that was signed over to
the insurance company as part of the hospitalization agreement.
Money wasn't really a problem as long as he continued to work
but, if he stopped to care for his family, the medical bills
would become impossible, and he didn't want to lose the house.

His parents had done well enough financially since they had been
living with him. They were receiving fixed incomes, but that
didn't go far when you were eating out two or three meals a day,
especially with the prices in the hospital cafeteria. The sale of
the farm would pay off the debts that they had accumulated over
the last few years of drought, but it wouldn't leave them much
more than what they would need to rent an apartment in
Claremont.

He hated to even consider financial situations. After all, he had
his wife back, or nearly back, and that was worth any price.
Still, he did have to consider the practical side of taking her
home. His medical insurance was designed for inpatient care, not
outpatient visits, and having her here was the best decision
financially. In addition to this, the memory of her collapsing in
his arms was still vivid in his nightmares, and he was afraid
that he couldn't get her help if he took her home. Maybe he was
a little paranoid, or perhaps it was the illusion that one fell
under when they spent too much time around hospitals -- the
hospital staff was necessary to maintain health. Whatever the
reason, he wasn't entirely comfortable taking Lois home this
way, and he would have to explain that to her.

Lois woke up nearly an hour later. Clark was thrilled to see her
big brown eyes as she smiled up at him. She was still cradling
his hand to her chest, and she now reached down to kiss his
fingers. "You stayed," she said quietly.

He smiled in response. "Always."

Hearing something in his voice that she couldn't quite place,
Lois asked him, "We need to talk, don't we?"

"I guess we do," he replied.

"What is it?"

Clark sighed. This was so hard to admit. A psychiatrist had once
accused him of having a "Superman Complex", believing he could
fix anything. The entire situation had taught him that he had
very little control over anything, but it was still difficult to
admit. "I just don't know if I can do this," he told his
wife.

"Do what?"

"Everything," he said quietly. "I don't know if I can take
care of CJ, and the baby, and you, and the Planet, and still
be..." He lowered his voice to ensure that he wasn't heard
beyond Lois's bed, "Superman."

Lois considered her husband for a moment. "Well," she began,
"I am getting better, and until I'm up to par I won't be going
home. You really don't have to visit every day," she added. "I
know that you have a lot that has to be done."

Clark cut her off abruptly. "Lois, out of that whole list, you
and CJ are the only things that I *want* to do. You're what
keeps me going."

Lois met his eyes, and took his hand. "I notice that there was
someone absent from that," she said. "What about the baby?"

Clark lowered his eyes once more. "I'll take care of him," he
said quietly.

Lois knew that voice. It was the same one he used when he was
talking about disciplining CJ or leaving her to go be Superman.
He wasn't happy about the baby. "I see."

Clark finally looked up into his wife's eyes. The pain he saw
there tore at him. "Lois, I just don't feel anything for the
baby," he admitted. "I don't even feel anger any more, just...
nothing. It's like he isn't even ours. I don't understand it,
and I hate it, but I can't change what I feel." His eyes
pleaded with Lois to understand, but the hurt remained in her
gaze. After a moment, he told her, "I'm sorry."

"No," she told him, squeezing his hand gently. "You told the
truth. I'm not angry, I'm just... I don't know. I thought I'd
be so excited about the baby, and I'm not. I thought maybe it
was because I'd been so sick, but I'm starting to wonder if
that's it." Lois paused for a moment, collecting her thoughts.
"I wanted him so much, and now I feel like maybe it was the
wrong decision to have him. I never felt like this with CJ; I was
always so thrilled to have him, and I couldn't stand to put him
down." She laughed softly at the memories. "Remember the time
Perry jumped on me for bringing him to work in that backpack? I
never wanted to be away from him, and this just feels so...
different."

Clark considered what she had said for a moment before agreeing.
"I'm worried about the baby," he told her. "Children need
love, and that can't be faked. Lois," he said in a stricken
voice, "I don't love him."

Lois put her arms around her husband and held him as he cried.
How long had he been holding it all in? He must have been so
alone, for so long. She understood what he was feeling about the
baby; she felt the same way. What she didn't understand was
*why*. They had loved CJ unconditionally, from the moment they
had first held him. He was theirs, and they had *felt* it, even
before Dr. Klein's DNA tests had confirmed that he did have both
of their genes. She wished they felt the same connection to the
child that she had given birth to.

***

Bernard Klein stared at the lab report before him. He couldn't
believe it! He felt so stupid, and yet so relieved. He *hadn't*
been wrong! He clutched the report tightly and was half-way out
of the room before he remembered to check for the results on the
second test. After printing these results as well, he held both
papers tightly and scrambled from the room. Now, where were those
car keys?

***

Clark was just finally dragging himself from Lois's side to
return home when Dr. Klein came bursting through the door to her
room. Lois jerked awake, and Clark whirled quickly to see who had
invaded their privacy. He had begun to relax some since the
nurses had disconnected the monitors in Lois's room, but he
lived in constant fear that someone would find out his secret.

"Lois, Clark, I have to speak with you!" Dr. Klein was
breathless with excitement, and his intensity stunned Clark
enough that he didn't comment on the fact that Dr. Klein had
awakened Lois.

"What is it?" Clark asked. He offered Dr. Klein a seat, but the
older man declined. Clark sat back down on the edge of Lois's
bed to await the news. He was pleased to see Dr. Klein here. He
would always be grateful that the man had taken such wonderful
care of his wife. When her illness had reached beyond his scope,
he had enlisted the aid of the best medical doctors in the field,
and had worked with them to keep her alive. He had managed the
paperwork to keep the insurance company paying for her private
room, and he had found the best pediatricians to care for the
baby. Also, he had accomplished all this without raising
questions as to why Lois had become ill. He had documented a rare
blood disorder that had kept Clark's secret, and had protected
them both from the media as well as the hospital administration.

Truly, Bernard Klein had been a friend as well as a scientist and
physician, and Clark would forever be grateful. If it had ever
occurred to him to be angry with the doctor for initiating the
pregnancy, he certainly hadn't held a grudge. In fact, he was
pleased that the doctor had helped them to grant Lois's wish.
After all, Dr. Klein had been the one to suggest termination of
the pregnancy, and her illness hadn't been his fault.

Odd, though, that Clark's forgiving nature didn't extend to
himself. Maybe not so odd, as he had always been harder on
himself than those around him.

Dr. Klein took a moment to regain his composure before he spoke.
Clutching two wrinkled papers in his hand, he waved them before
his face. "It's all here!" he announced. "I was wrong. It was
a chemical reaction!"

Lois and Clark looked at one another for a moment before
confronting the doctor. "What *are* you talking about?" Lois
asked.

Dr. Klein looked stunned for a moment, then went back to the
beginning. "I've been doing some additional testing on the
agent I used to facilitate fertilization," he began. Looking at
the confused couple before him, be began again. "The chemical
soup I used to help the egg and sperm join," he clarified. "We
had assumed that it was the pregnancy itself that caused Lois's
reaction, but that isn't the case. It was the formula."

"But you said that it was safe. I remember asking." Clark was
confused.

"It was," he answered. "The formula itself was safe.
However," he said, waving the papers in front of him, "The
combination of the formula *and* the HCG in Lois's bloodstream
was nearly fatal."

Clark reached out and held his wife's hand. "HCG is the hormone
that meant she was pregnant, right?"

Dr. Klein nodded his head vigorously. "Yes. The level of this
hormone increases with pregnancy. It's the hormone that allows
the body to maintain the pregnancy. This explains why the illness
got progressively worse as the pregnancy continued. The level of
HCG increased, and the reaction intensified. This also explains
why Lois didn't immediately recover when the pregnancy ended.
HCG is also present at low levels during lactation and, even if a
mother doesn't nurse, the hormone still declines very
gradually."

"So it was a combination of chemicals that poisoned me, not the
baby?" Lois asked.

"Exactly!" Dr. Klein replied. "It wasn't you, Clark," he
told him earnestly. "It was the chemicals."

Clark faced Lois with tears in his eyes. The relief they shared
at knowing that it was not his genetics that poisoned her was
enormous. They looked at each other for several moments,
forgetting about the doctor until he spoke again. "This also
means," he continued, "that additional children are a
possibility. The egg and sperm could be fertilized outside her
body; then, once the chemical is removed, the ovum could be
implanted into Lois without exposing her to the danger."

Clark was still looking into his wife's eyes when the last was
said. He saw her smile and he smiled with her. "I don't think
that's something we'll be interested in," he told Dr. Klein.
"But it's something that CJ might need to know."

"Not really," Dr. Klein replied. "That was the other thing I
wanted to mention. CJ's specimen didn't contain the same
resistance to fertilization that yours did. In fact, he seems
more than able to easily fertilize an Earth female. I think you
should really have a discussion with him about taking proper
precautions should he become..." Dr. Klein blushed slightly as
he continued, "...active."

Clark smiled at his wife once more. They had been startled when
Dr. Klein had notified them of CJ's request for testing, but
they had agreed that it would be a good idea to let him find out
as much about himself as possible. They couldn't give him all
the answers, but they would allow him all the answers possible.

"Well, I do need to go," Dr. Klein told the couple. "I left
the office as soon as I received the results, and I may have left
some things undone." He recognized the look of affection in
their eyes, and he had a feeling that he was really not needed
now. Quietly, he left the room, leaving the test results
forgotten on the bed.

"So, Lois, are you ready to try again?" he asked his wife. He
knew her answer, but he needed to hear it.

Lois shook her head. "No," she told him. "It's not something
I want to go through again; at least, not now. Maybe, in a few
years, we'll reconsider, and it's always nice to know that the
possibility exists, but I'm not planning on it any time soon."

Clark agreed with her silently. He didn't know that he would
ever want to risk another pregnancy. There were too many unknowns
to it, and it didn't seem worth the risk. Besides, the joy of
having a child with her was not what he had expected, and he was
still grieving somewhat for the loss of that imaginary ideal.

With a sigh, Clark leaned his forehead against his wife's. "I
need to get home," he told her. "It appears that I need to have
a discussion with our son."

Lois drew back to look at her husband. "I know that you need
time to adjust to the baby, but I really want to come home."

Clark looked into her beautiful brown eyes and sighed. He wanted
her home more than anything, but he liked the idea that she had
nurses at her beck and call here. She wasn't able to walk yet,
and was barely able to feed herself, much less bathe and clothe
herself. He loved caring for her, but he didn't think she would
allow it once they left the hospital.

"We'll ask the doctors," he told her. "If they think it's
okay, then we'll manage something." He had his doubts, but he
would do whatever would make her happy.

He wasn't disappointed. Lois smiled, and gave him a kiss unlike
anything he had felt in a very long time. He knew that she was a
long way from being able to deliver all that the kiss promised,
but he enjoyed it just the same. "I love you," he reminded her.
Then Clark made a hasty departure, hoping all the way home that
he could get to a cold shower before his mother saw him in the
suit.

***

The shrill, piercing cry tore through the quiet of the Kent home.
CJ rolled over in bed and groggily reached for his alarm clock.
He had already crushed the object when he realized that it was
not what was producing the awful sound.

He wished vaguely that he had looked at the clock before
destroying it, but he hadn't. As the cries subsided, he got up
to see whether it was his father or grandmother that was taking
care of the baby.

He nearly tripped over Kat's body on his way out the door. She
had rolled in the night, and her sleeping bag was now blocking
his path. As he stepped over her, he wondered if she ever woke up
with noise, but he didn't dwell on it.

Kat had spent many nights in his room. Once again, her father was
away on business, and she was his roommate. Granted, she no
longer shared his bed, but that was the only concession to age
that they had made. CJ grinned a little as he plodded down the
hallway. The irony of the situation was that his father had just
completed a lecture on the necessity of birth control in the
unlikely case that CJ chose not to observe abstinence when Kat
had asked to spend the night. "Right," he mumbled. "Like I'd
take the chance of having a screaming brat of my own."

CJ peeked his head in the door of his father's room. He saw his
grandmother lifting the baby out of his bassinet, and asked her
if he could help. It appeared that his father was out on patrol
again, and the stairs gave Martha some trouble.

"CJ, can you run downstairs and warm up a bottle for me"? she
asked.

"Sure, Grandma." CJ darted down the stairs and removed a
prepared bottle from the refrigerator. He used his heat vision to
warm it slightly, then checked the temperature. Then, he darted
back upstairs. His grandmother looked tired as she set on the
edge of the bed with the baby, so he stepped in. "Let me feed
him."

Martha agreed gratefully. She was tired, and her arthritis was
bothering her. She never slept well when Jonathan was away, and
the details of selling the farm were taking longer than they
would have liked. She passed the baby to CJ, then reminded him,
"He'll need a diaper, too."

"I know, Grandma," he replied as he picked up a diaper from the
table next to the bassinet and placed the baby on the bed. Martha
watched long enough to assure herself that CJ did know what he
was doing, then she said good-night and walked back to the guest
room.

CJ efficiently diapered his brother, then fed him the warm
bottle. Once the infant was burped, he settled down next to him
on his father's bed, and cuddled the baby. It wasn't long
before both boys were asleep. CJ's last coherent thought was
that he was glad he had helped Kat with her baby-sitting so many
times, so he knew how to take care of babies.

***

Chapter 15

Simply put, the next couple of weeks were a mess for the Kents.
Clark juggled his time between the paper, hospital visits, the
occasional rescue and the absolutely essential household chores.
CJ did his best to study for his finals, in between caring for
the baby and visiting his mom. He had to stop writing for the
Planet -- there just weren't enough hours in the day -- but he
tried not to worry about that.

Jonathan and Martha finally found an apartment within their
budget, and began to move some items into it. They knew that they
would need to move out soon, because the baby was moving around
enough that the bassinet wouldn't contain him much longer. They
had promised CJ that he wouldn't lose his room, so they needed
to vacate the guest room to make room for a nursery. Frankly,
they were worried about how Clark would manage nights without
them in the house, but they weren't sure what to do about the
situation.

Martha was most concerned about CJ. She was afraid that
night-time care of the baby would fall to him. Granted, he was
adept at caring for the infant, but he was a teenager. He had
already given up his job under the pressure of final exams and
child care, and they didn't want him to lose his summer as well.
Nevertheless, the house could only accommodate so many full-time
residents, and the growing child would soon displace them.

It was on one of many chaotic nights that the knock came on the
front door. CJ was juggling a full bottle in one hand and an
uncooperative baby in the other, so he asked Kat to get the door.
When she opened the door, she was faced with a short man wearing
an old-fashioned suit and wire-rimmed spectacles. She probably
should have been worried about a stranger at the door, but he
seemed familiar in an odd sort of way.

"Why, you must be young Kathryn. How nice to finally meet you.
My name is Herbert George Wells, and I've come to speak with
CJ."

The little man spoke quickly. He had a friendly energy to his
voice that belied his obvious age. Kat thought again that she
should have been frightened, but instead she was slightly
bemused.

"CJ," Kat called over her shoulder. "There's someone here to
see you."

CJ entered the living room with his brother in one arm and a
soggy diaper in the other. He passed the baby to Kat, then
excused himself long enough to wash his hands in the kitchen. He
returned carrying a warm bottle, and apologized for the
interruption.

CJ didn't exactly recognize the man before him, but he did know
who he was. He had heard dozens of stories about the little time
traveler, and had, in fact, wanted to meet him. If anyone had any
clues as to his origins, this would be the man.

"Mr. Wells," he greeted the older man. "Please, have a seat."
CJ indicated the couch, and waited until the man seemed
comfortable. Kat settled herself on a chair a few feet away, and
began to feed the baby.

"Oh, it certainly is nice to meet the two of you," the man said
in the same friendly voice. What he wanted to do was to dive
right into the issue, but he had learned with this boy's parents
that the direct approach was not always best. With that in mind,
he decided to engage in a little friendly conversation.

"Actually, it's pretty cool meeting you, too," CJ answered.
I've been wondering about a few things, and you seem the most
likely person to answer my questions."

"I'd be happy to help with anything I can regarding your
past," Wells told him. "I'm afraid I can't answer questions
about the future, though, without causing problems in the time
line."

CJ smiled in understanding. "That makes sense, I guess. Anyway,
my questions are about the past. Specifically, they're about
*my* past. No one seems to know where I came from, or *when* I
came from. I thought maybe you'd know." CJ tried to keep the
hope from his voice, but was unable to do so. He wanted so much
to know the answers. His life was so confused at the moment, and
this one piece of knowledge would give him some comfort, even if
it wouldn't solve his problems.

Wells looked slightly confused as he regarded the boy. He had
believed that CJ understood his origins. The future CJ certainly
had an understanding of his origins, and he was slightly
unprepared for this. He glanced over at the baby and allowed a
questioning look to slip through before he answered. "CJ, *this*
is where you come from," he said, looking pointedly at the baby
in Kat's arms.

CJ looked completely confused. He had been expecting some
cosmically brilliant answer as to why he was displaced from his
own time, why he belonged here now rather than later, and this
wasn't what he was expecting. He looked down at his "brother"
for a moment. Sure, the baby looked like him, but it looked like
his father too. Family resemblances were not unusual, and he
didn't look *that* much like him.

Kat alternated glances from CJ to the baby. She saw some
resemblance, but not that much. Finally, she stood and carried
the baby over to the far wall in the room, the wall where the
family portraits were hung. She looked from the baby pictures of
CJ to the child in her arms, and wondered if the label of
"galactically stupid" was stamped on her forehead. It seemed so
obvious. As she looked from the baby to the picture and back
again, she was stunned at how similar they looked. It was rather
obvious, now, and she wondered how they could possibly have
missed it.

CJ had followed Kat, and he too was looking from the baby
pictures to the baby. It *was* him. It gave him an odd feeling to
see himself, to know he had held himself. It was beyond weird. He
looked back at Mr. Wells, who was just now rising to speak to
them. "You are in the proper time, CJ; it's this baby that is
out of time," he said. "That's why I'm here."

***

Clark sat next to his wife on her hospital bed. She was so much
better now. She was nearly back to her old self. Now she was
sleeping, still in a form of shock from the news that had been
delivered.

Clark had been as stunned at his arrival home that night as he
had been the night he had found CJ and the baby asleep in his
bed. They had looked so sweet, and yet there had been a feeling
of unreality to the scene that he hadn't understood. He did
now.

There was also level of comfort in the whole situation that
hadn't been present before. A type of understanding that he
hadn't possessed. He wondered if this were taking the easy way
out. After all, there was a certain amount of transition that was
normal when an infant entered the home, and it made Clark feel
like he was defying nature to allow this to happen.

H.G. Wells had explained that he had entered this time to check
on a temporal anomaly. Apparently, a time window had been opened
into this general time frame, and he needed to check for
disruption into the time line. They had not been able to find
exactly when or why the temporal disturbance had taken place, but
it didn't appear that Tempus, or any other villain, was at
work.

He had mentioned this to CJ and Kat earlier, and had got a shock
when Kat had nervously confessed that *she* might have been
responsible for the "rogue" time window. She'd explained what
had happened at STAR Labs when she'd visited there with CJ, and
swore that nothing more had happened, so there couldn't be any
disruption to the time line... could there?

Wells assured her that her inadvertent "interference" with the
time stream could not have had any significant effects, and she
sagged against CJ with relief. After a moment, she realised what
she was doing, blushed and moved away to flop into a chair; CJ's
eyes followed her as she did so, and he was pinker than usual as
well.

Wells was equally relieved; he knew how fragile the thread of
history could be, and to have a possible attack on Utpoia reduced
to the harmless effects of a young woman's curiosity was a great
load off his mind. It did, however, make him realise that the
Interdimensional Transport Device could continue to be a danger
if it remained in this time. Fortunately, his own such device
meant that removing the other one from STAR Labs would be a
simple matter, and he'd asked Clark to apologise to Dr. Klein
for him, but the danger was simply too great.

Clark had agreed; he'd felt that he had no choice, really -- as,
indeed, he'd felt about giving the baby to the little man.
Wells's presence did solve the problem of relocating the boy
into his proper time. If the baby weren't sent back to 1996, CJ
would not be here now; if he *was* sent back, they would lose the
opportunity to raise him now. Of course, they had *already*
raised him. Clark put his head back in his hands as the
intricacies of time travel once more threatened to give him a
headache.

Lois was better. She had been starting to look forward to coming
home, and the baby had been in that equation. Of course, she
seemed less bothered about transporting the baby back in time
than Clark, but she did appear to be in shock over the situation.
They had always assumed that they had been sent CJ to protect him
from some outside danger, but the only danger this baby faced was
a busy family. Working families had been raising their children
for decades -- they had done so themselves -- and it seemed like
cheating to send the child to an easier time.

Wells entered the room, and Clark raised his head to face him.
"I'm sure you have reservations about this decision, Clark.
Please, ask any questions that you have." Wells seated himself
in the chair next to the bed, and waited for Clark to voice his
concerns.

"It just seems so strange," Clark began. "We have to choose
something that should be out of our hands. It's confusing," he
smiled. "But it makes this strange sort of sense, too."

Wells nodded his understanding. "How a temporal loop begins is a
mystery to us all. The fact is, once a loop is initiated, it
*must* be carried out to maintain temporal stability. The circle
must be completed, or the time line will change. There are
elements that allow us to see when a temporal disturbance is
taking place, and one of those is a feeling of... wrongness...
for lack of a better word. Can you honestly tell me that it feels
right to have this infant here, now?"

Clark shook his head. "No, I can't. This has felt 'wrong'
ever since I first saw him. I thought I was just angry or guilty
because of Lois, but I guess I should have realized that it was
more."

"Having the child raised in this time line would make Utopia
impossible. At seventeen, CJ is capable of dealing with the
stresses that Lois's recovery and your parents' aging will
impose. For that matter, he can be a remarkable help, and what he
learns now will be instrumental in the formation of Utopia. His
descendants will create a world that will be ideal for all of the
inhabitants of Earth, but he can't do that if he is raised in
chaos."

"Clark," a quiet voice said from the bed. "The baby doesn't
belong here. That's why it's been so hard." Lois leaned toward
her husband, placing her hand on his leg. She gave a brief,
bitter laugh before adding, "Why isn't our life ever simple?"

Wells glanced at Lois fondly. "Are you feeling better now?" It
had concerned him when she had become so upset during their
initial discussion, and he was pleased that she was showing her
usual resilience.

"I'm as well as I can be, knowing that my baby is about to be
sent nearly two decades into the past," she smiled once more.
"Still, it does explains so much. I remember how right it all
felt back then, and how hard it is now. Just the thought of
facing the terrible twos is enough to make me ill, and I didn't
know how I was going to get through it."

Wells smiled his understanding. He hadn't realized the essential
part that he had played in situating CJ in time, but he was
pleased that he could be a part of putting this family back where
it belonged. They had been through so much, and the best part of
their lives was just beginning. It was no wonder that they were
awash in confusion when things began to go wrong.

"When does he go back?" Clark asked quietly.

"I need to pick up the Interdimensional Transport Device from
STAR Labs, then I will meet you back at your house. That should
give you time to explain things to your parents, and also to
prepare the baby for the trip."

Clark nodded, and Wells shook his hand before leaving the room.
Turning back to his wife, he looked for the pain that he was sure
to find at the loss of her child. Strangely, he saw nothing but
the relief that he felt himself. "Are you okay with this,
Lois?"

Lois sighed, and then replied, "I suppose so. I can't imagine
CJ growing up without Kat, and I couldn't live without the son
that I have now. I just feel like I'm taking the easy way out,
and I keep wondering what the catch is."

Clark kissed his wife gently, and then prepared to confront his
parents. They had been the grounding force for the baby, caring
for him when his own parents could not. He had no clue how they
would take this news, but they had to know.

***

Martha wrapped the infant in the dark blue blanket, and stroked
his cheek once more. She would miss him, but she was grateful to
know that she would be young enough to enjoy watching this child
grow into such a wonderful young man. At least, she had been
young enough, or was, or would be? The entire concept really
confused her, but Clark seemed at peace for the first time in
ages.

She had always wondered why CJ's blanket had looked as new and
fresh as the day Clark had arrived in it. CJ had carried the
blanket for years, and now it was a tattered mess that he kept
hidden in his bottom dresser drawer. She had spent hours digging
through boxes back at the farm until she had found Clark's
blanket, still new and fresh. It had been worth the effort to
give him this. She covered the baby more tightly and kissed him
gently. "I'll see you soon, little man," she told him. "I
love you."

With tears in her eyes, she turned back into the waiting arms of
her husband. Jonathan had already said his good-bye, so he merely
held his wife as she cried.

CJ was next to say goodbye. He felt as though he was losing his
brother, and it hurt. Realizing that he held a part of this baby
within himself was some comfort, but he would still miss the warm
snuggling and sweet smell of the child. Someday, he planned to
have his own children. Lots of them! He wanted to fill a whole
house with them. Of course, not in his immediate future, but
someday.

CJ reached down to allow the baby to grasp his finger, then
whispered a few words to him. Kat heard him, and stepped a little
closer to CJ. Once he was finished, he stepped back, and put his
arm around his best friend, both taking and giving comfort.

Finally, Wells carried the baby to Clark. After looking at him
for a moment, Clark finally took the baby into his arms. He
turned away from the group gathered, and spoke to his son. "Hey,
little one. I know things have been tough here. They're gonna
get better now. You are going someplace where people love you,
and will take really good care of you." He caressed the
infant's cheek, looking into the solemn brown eyes and, for the
first time, seeing his son. He lifted the baby a little higher
and gently kissed his forehead. "That's for your mama. She
wanted to be here, but we decided that this would be easier.
You're gonna be with her soon, and she will be able to really
enjoy you. Try to take it easy on her at first; she'll be new at
this, and not too sure of herself. But, I'll tell you what,
she's the best mom in the world, just as good as mine, and
she'll take the very best care of you."

Clark rocked the baby for a moment more, feeling again the love
and attachment that he had felt for the little person that had
been dropped in his lap so many years ago. He glanced down at the
infant, now drifting off to sleep, and traced the side of his
cheek with a tender finger. Knowing the wonderful person that
this baby would develop into made the decision easier and at once
made it harder. With a sigh, he conceded that the decision had
never really been his at all and, with a final kiss, he gave the
child back to H.G. Wells.

Wells once more reassured them that what they were doing was
right, and shifted the baby slightly to reach the keypad of the
device in his hand. After touching a few buttons, a window
appeared in the air, and he stepped into it. Clark stood quietly
as his son was taken into another time, and then watched the
window collapse upon itself and disappear.

As Clark turned away from the empty space, he was enveloped in a
hug by his parents. He held on, and allowed himself to cry for
the loss of the few months he'd had with the baby. Perhaps, if
he could have pulled himself from the grief and pain sooner, he
could have enjoyed the baby, and perhaps not. The saddest part
was that he would never know.

***

It was barely a week later that Clark carried his wife over the
threshold of their home. It had been a long morning, and she was
exhausted. There were balloons, banners, and flowers wall-to-wall
in the living room. Friends from the Planet, neighbors -- even
Lucy -- had joined together to welcome Lois back to her world. If
there was an undercurrent of sadness to the gathering, due to the
loss of the baby (the Kents had told everyone that the little boy
had died, and Dr Klein had helped with the paperwork), then it
was more than overshadowed by the joy at having his mother well
again.

Amid the chaos, Lois put her head down on her husband's
shoulder, and whispered in his ear. He nodded his agreement and,
instead of stopping in the living room where all the craziness
was centered, he carried his wife up the stairs and lay her down
in their bed. With a sigh, Lois curled up on her side and went
right to sleep, leaving Clark to face the people gathered
downstairs.

The group seemed to understand that Lois was too tired to deal
with their party and, while they kept it quiet, they did stay to
enjoy the food and conversation. Jimmy had flown in from New
York, where he was working as a reporter for the Times. He
casually flirted with a few of the guests, but the ring on his
left hand demonstrated that the flirting was friendly and not
serious. Martha and Jonathan sat at the kitchen table with Lucy,
discussing with her the pitfalls of parenting a teenager. Lucy
was just drifting into this world, and she felt a little lost.
Her husband had stayed home with the kids so that they wouldn't
miss finals, and she was enjoying a little time to herself.
Clusters of neighbors and Planet employees were scattered about
the room, celebrating the return of one of their own.

Clark drifted from group to group. He still felt some guilt that
he had not tried harder to locate Lois's parents for the party,
but she seemed almost grateful not to have to deal with her
mother's smothering just now. He promised himself that, as soon
as things calmed down, he would go find them and bring them up to
date. The resolution eased his guilt somewhat, and he was able to
enjoy some of the gathering, even as he felt detached from it.

"Dad, why don't you just go upstairs for a while? You look as
tired as Mom did," CJ said as he returned from the kitchen with
another case of sodas. "I'll make excuses if you want, but you
were up all night, and you look like you need some sleep."

Clark nodded vaguely in thanks. He *was* tired, and still feeling
a little too much melancholy to deal with the festive atmosphere.
With a sigh, he ascended the stairs and let himself into the
dimly-lit room that he once more shared with his wife. She was
curled onto her side, as she had been when he had left her.

Clark made sure the door was locked, then pulled off his shirt
and jeans. He carefully levitated and lowered himself next to
Lois's side in the bed. He wanted to pull her close, but he was
afraid that he would wake her. Instead, he curled onto his side,
facing his wife, and watched her sleep. He relaxed as he listened
to her heartbeat, and was soon lulled into a state of relaxation
that was neither fully awake nor fully asleep. He became more
aware of her when she rolled away from him and then backed
herself into his lap, snuggling spoon-style as they had always
slept. With a smile, Clark put his arm around Lois and pulled her
a little closer before giving in to the first true sleep he had
experienced in over a year.

***

Lois awoke to the amazing warmth of her husband wrapped around
her back. She wiggled her bottom back into his lap, and sighed as
he pulled her closer. After a few minutes of contentment, she
carefully pulled away from her husband. She sat up slowly,
allowing herself to adjust to the faint dizzy feeling that still
accompanied a change in position, then padded carefully to the
bathroom to tend to her morning business.

Once her teeth were brushed, and her bladder relieved, she walked
back through the bedroom and sat herself on the window seat. She
considered cuddling with her husband, but he was still asleep, so
he most likely needed that more than he needed her for the
moment.

CJ was already up. She supposed that he was enjoying the freedom
of not spending his weekend at the hospital with her. She glanced
down to see him running through the yard, dodging trees. She
observed carefully, much as she had done years earlier when they
had moved in. Once again, she saw him approach Kat, but this
time, instead of sitting with her, he wrapped an arm around her
at a full run, turned, and pulled her to the ground. They landed
in a giggling tumble of arms and legs, and rolled around for a
few moments before settling into what appeared to be a discussion
with Kat lying atop CJ's chest.

Lois really considered going downstairs to find out what was
going on. She was warm, though, enjoying the early morning
sunshine. She did need to talk to her son; she had still heard
voices from downstairs when Clark had come to bed, and she was
certain that CJ had handled the end of the party. If she knew her
son, the room would be spotless when she went downstairs. CJ was
the most responsible child she had ever known, and it was that
faith in him that kept her from checking on him when she saw Kat
lower her lips to CJ's in a kiss that was part experiment, and
maybe more. Discreetly, she turned away from the young couple and
gave a silent prayer that they would not get in too deep.

As she turned from the window, she saw that Clark had not yet
removed the bassinet from the corner of the bedroom. It was still
sitting there, as though waiting for the baby to be returned to
it. She sighed deeply, wondering what the little one was up to
now. She supposed that she should feel some guilt for allowing
the child to be sent away, but just looking out at CJ had
reassured her that she had done the right thing. CJ belonged
here, now, with Kat. It was a minor miracle to find someone that
you really belonged with in the world, and she was pleased that
he had done so.

After several more minutes, Lois began to feel sleepy once again.
She was certain that the constant tiredness would fade with time,
and the doctors assured her that this was the case, but she had
found that it was best to give in just now. She stood, and then
took the couple of steps back to her bed. She sat down carefully
and, with some difficulty, pulled her legs up to the bed. By the
time she had settled in, Clark was awake and reaching over to
pull her close. She rested her head on his chest, tangling her
legs with his, and fell into a healing sleep. She was back where
she belonged.

Clark looked down at his sleeping wife, content to feel her
heartbeat against his chest. He could hear CJ and Kat playing
outside, and vaguely wondered what time it was, but he didn't
care enough to check the clock. Lois was in his arms, and that
was all he needed to know. He kissed her gently on the forehead,
and allowed himself to drift back to sleep.

***

CJ caught Kat in a running tackle, and pulled her to the ground.
She had dared him to catch her, and he had certainly done so. She
laughed as he spun her through the air, and carefully cushioned
her body with his as they hit the ground. He still hadn't
mastered levitation, but he could manage to remain airborne a few
seconds longer than most.

Kat playfully kicked at CJ, relatively sure that she couldn't
hurt him. They rolled a few times in the soft grass before she
came to a stop on his chest. Looking down at him, seeing a light
in his eyes that hadn't been there for so long, she felt a great
deal of relief. "Okay," she relented. "So you *are* still
faster than me. Boys are *supposed* to be faster than girls."

CJ looked up at Kat and wondered at the softness atop him. She
certainly didn't look soft. In fact, Kat was one of the most
athletic girls he knew. She ran, played soccer, and had even
tried out for cheerleading once, although she had dropped out
when she got her job. Still, there was a softness, both to her
body and her eyes, that he hadn't seen before. He looked up into
her wide green eyes and really considered giving her a hard time.
In fact, he had just decided to really embarrass her when she
leaned a little closer to him. Lost in the moment, he kissed her.
He didn't plan it, or analyze it, he just felt it. He felt it
from the warmth of his lips to the tips of his toes. Who would
have thought that lips could have so many nerves?

When Kat finally pulled back, looking down into soft brown eyes
that were slightly fuzzy, she knew that something had changed.
She tried to think of something brilliant to say, something
profound and fitting to such a moment, but the only thing that
came out was a whispered, "Wow...."

CJ looked up at his best friend, and had no clue what to do. This
changed things, and he wasn't sure what to think of the
situation. The one thing that he did know was that this was Kat.
She was as much a part of him as his love of books and his skill
with writing, and she would never hurt him. He echoed her
whispered, "Wow," before reaching a hand up to wrap around her
head, threading his fingers through the cool brown strands of
hair. When his lips met hers this time, there was less surprise,
and more enjoyment as he let himself get lost for a moment in the
sensations.

They stayed that way for a long time, just enjoying the newness
of their first real kiss. Then Kat suddenly realized that
something wasn't right. When she tried to pull back, she
realized that CJ was floating about six inches off the ground,
levitating his own weight as well as hers. She considered
mentioning it, but decided instead to just enjoy and not spoil
the mood. After all, every girl wanted a boyfriend that was
"super".

***

Epilogue

Herbert George Wells stepped from the window with a bit of a
spring in his step. He had left the baby with a short note, just
enough to tell Lois and Clark that the baby was theirs. He knew
from the history books, and the legends of the current day, that
this was all they would need. Frankly, he wouldn't have left
that much, except for the innate honesty of Clark; the super-hero
most likely would have turned the child over to Child Protective
Services, concerned that he was stolen or missing, without this
little bit of help.

He sighed as he sat in the self-adjusting chair that dominated
his living room. This was a wonderful time to live in. Aside from
resting and enjoying the life here, he had no worries in the
world of Utopia. Certainly, Lois and Clark's descendants had
made this world a wonderful place. It had taken several
generations, but it had all begun with the dedication and honesty
of the reporting team that he had just left the baby with.

He glanced up at the picture on the wall. It was one of several
family portraits that the Kents had taken over the generations.
This particular shot held nearly thirty people, including CJ and
Kathryn, their six children, and their children's spouses and
children. They were a remarkable group, full of energy and life
-- and, above all, integrity. He briefly allowed his mind to
wonder what would have become of Utopia if CJ had grown up in his
birth time rather than the time he was meant for, but he didn't
allow the train of thought to go far. It simply wasn't meant to
be.

Without his proper placement in time, CJ would not have been what
he should have been. In addition, he would not have met Kathryn,
and his children would not only have been different, but their
spouses would have been different. The near-perfect world that he
now enjoyed would not exist, and millions of lives would have
been lost. It was not a world that he chose to think about. He
had seen enough alternate dimensions to understand that a single
change in history could violate a time line for an eternity.

With a feeling of accomplishment, and gratitude that he could be
a small part of the formation of Utopia, he leaned back in the
chair and relaxed. Within moments, he slipped off to sleep,
dreaming peaceful dreams.

THE END